Previously: Buffy tried to get one up on the Mayor, but Willow ended up kidnapped, freaking spider things were released and the Mayor said that B and Angel weren’t going to last.
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The Prom
Lorraine: I watched the entire episode, got down to the end of this post and came back here to fairly warn you all: this post gradually melts into lots of feels and little snark. Also, Team Heartless Cow, I’m telling you in advance to shut up.
K: Good thing I live on the other side of the world, because this episode (as I said in an email to the Ladies of Snark prior to commenting) gives me Negative a Millionty Feels. Sorry…
Sweeney: I love this episode and I might actually board a plane with the express purpose of hurting you.
Lor: Plus, I’m sure after the violence we’d definitely have time to explore Australia. It would be swell.
Buffy sleeps and Angel is watching her really creepily. Or maybe it’s romantic. I find the whole “I was watching you while you slept” thing more creepy, especially since Angel’s face is like five inches from Buffy’s. (K: Definitely creepy.) ANYWAYS. She wakes up and they banter about her bed head and the fact that Angel’s place is not very girl-friendly since he owns no mirrors and there is no natural light.
Buffy snuggles up to him and starts suggesting a few, “we’re a legit couple” modifications to Angel’s place. Angel just grunts noncommittally, though Buffy doesn’t seem to notice. She keeps on about how it would be nice to spend the night after the prom, which btdubs, Angel is going to.
K: DIDN’T YOU PEOPLE BREAK UP LIKE SIX EPISODES AGO? What the fuck parallel universe have I stumbled into?
Sweeney: We covered this last episode. KEEP UP.
Lor: Angel tells B she should get going and she whinges; surely they have a few hours before sunrise. She stands and opens the curtain a bit and sunlight streams in. I’m not sure why Angel would put his bed facing the curtain, because that’s just asking for trouble. He jumps away in pain as the sunlight touches him. Buffy apologizes and Angel looks at her like, “bitch be crazy.” Roll credits.
Xander is strolling up to school and Anya calls out to him. He’s all, “what up ex-vengeance demon!” and it all seems a little too-soon and too-lax, considering that Anya is actively looking to regain her demon powers. But also, it’s hilarious. (S: Can’t even be bothered by the too-soon-too-lax because this is when I realized that Anya does a lot to make Xander more likable.) Anya says it’s Xander’s “fault” she’s stuck in high school, as he was the unfaithful douche she came around to punish. Instead she lost her powers and is stuck with “feelings,” the current prevailing one the desire to go to the prom with someone. Xander sarcastically wonders why she doesn’t have a date. Anya: Men are evil. Will you go with me? Xander hems and haws, but we all know he’s going to say yes.
Sweeney: NO BUT SERIOUSLY. Anya is wonderful. “I have all these feelings and I don’t understand it and I don’t like it.” SAID ME, EVERY SINGLE DAY OF EVER.
Lor: Cut to Xander telling the other Scoobies he said yes, as it came down to Anya or a sock puppet, and then he demonstrates this with his hand. I want him to stop immediately. (K: AGREED. OMFG, MAKE IT STOP.) Buffy looks on the bright side, as they now all have dates. Plus, she’s got a pretty, pretty dress, though I would forewarn her that wearing pretty dresses doesn’t often work out for her. (S: SO MANY LINKS, B.) “Angel’s gonna lose it,” she happies. And then has to awkwardly clarify that “it” is definitely not his soul.
Angel is walking around the Brooding Bungalow, when he spots one of Buffy’s notebooks, where she’s doodled, “Buffy and Angel 4eva.” (S: Sorry, that’s my notebook. I left it there when was I practicing my lurking.) The Clarinets of Mopiness are all “dooo deee doooo not likely forever dooooo.” I translated them for you. (K: A+ on the translation skills.)
Someone knocks on the door and it’s Joyce! I’m not sure why I exclaimed that, but I guess I went through a mental list of people it could be and Joyce was not one I considered. She enters and comments politely on his spacious house. “Yeah,” Angel replies. “I need a lot of brooding room.” She also notices the manacles on the wall, and is appropriately skeeved out. Joyce is here to talk to Angel about Buffy. Radda, radda, radda, Buffy and Angel are from two different worlds, she’s just a girl, Angel is old enough to be her ancestor. She says Buffy is like any girl in love in so much that she cannot see very far into the future. Angel knows all of this, thinks about it more now that B is staying in Sunnydale. Joyce says she hopes he cares about Buffy enough to make hard choices.
Meh. I get that this is the set-up for the end between these two, but I’m not sure I like Joyce butting in here. Concern is nice and and but I think Joyce should’ve minded her own business or spoken to Buffy directly. Also, we know that Angel has been having doubts, but it sucks to think about him coming to any conclusions with outside influence.
K: Literally the only reason I can think of for Joyce sticking her nose in here is that Kristine Sutherland was contracted for a certain number of episodes and they were running one short. Because REALLY?? NO. NOT OKAY, JOYCE.
Sweeney: +1. I know that I have every bias against this scene (love of Buffy/Angel, hatred of Joyce) but it annoys me for both of the aforementioned reasons. She doesn’t need to be there for the Big Plot Point and is clearly just there to fill out her episode order.
Lor: Wiggins Library. Willow is describing something horrific and Giles is all, “demon?” but nope. Prom dress. Buffy asks him to get his mind out of the Hellmouth and he reminds them that Mayor McSleaze is soon to be ascended. From the pages that Willow stole from the Books of Asc, we learn that the Mayor will be transforming from mortal to demon, though the problem is now, which demon? Wesley enters with Cordelia and he says that they shouldn’t be wasting time on another effin’ dance. Cordy flirts that he would look “way 007 in a tux.” Buffy turns to look at Xander at that moment, and he gives her an adorable, “I’m okay. Really.” smile. Aw.
The talk turns back to what everyone is wearing to the event. Giles: And I shall be wearing pink taffeta as chenille will not go with my complexion. Can we please talk about the Ascension.” Honey. I don’t think chenille goes with anyone’s complexion.
Buffy says she knows that they have a lot of pre-Ascension work to do, but that if they are all going to die on Graduation Day, they might as well enjoy prom. Buffy: One night of glory, not too much to ask.
K: Oh, Buff. You live on the Hellmouth. Pretty much ANYTHING is too much to ask.
Sweeney: Totes too much to ask, but still a valid point from Buffy.
Lor: The Drums of Doom tell that it was definitely too much to ask. In a run down house somewhere, a pair of hands puts a video into a VCR. Inside a cage, a demon-y thing forced to watch the TV.
Church ‘o Dreams: Buffy and Angel are getting married. Buffy looks very pretty in a relatively simple and traditional dress. (K: Simple, but ENORMOUS. I’m pretty sure she raided an entire ballet company worth of tutus for the tulle that makes up the skirt) Angelic Music is angelic. The groom kisses the bride and they head towards the bright light of the exit. Bells toll. Once outside, Angel looks a little uncomfortable in the sun (poop face!) but it is Buffy who erupts in flames because she’s wearing a pretty dress, so doom.
Angel startles awake and pants, which is funny because he doesn’t breathe.
After the Not Commercial Break, Angel helps Buffy down into a sewer in search of a vampire that got away. Buffy suggests letting the vampire get away (WHO IS SHE?) but Angel says he needs closure. Heard the anvil fall? Buffy asks Angel about his tux, but he tries to keep the conversation and focus on vampire hunting. Said Hunted Vamp jumps down into Buffy’s path. “Not now,” she says as she quickly dusts him, probably just to remind us all that Buffy is still Buffy and a badass.
Sweeney: And our favorite forever.
Lor: Vampire dusted, Buffy confronts Angel about getting wiggy over the prom. He counters with his worry that she’s getting too invested. Angel says they need to talk but like, probably not in a sewer. Buffy wants him to just spit it out, so he does. He says their being together is unfair to her. She asks if this has anything to do with what the Mayor said last episode. Angel this the Mayor was right and Buffy says he can’t be because he’s the bad guy. It’s a little bit of that Buffy “bad is bad” mentality, though I can’t agree. I think bad guys get to be more honest, if they choose to be. They don’t, after all, have to worry about hurting feelings. See: Every time we’ve seen Spike so far.
K: Does this make Team Heartless Cow a bad guy?
Sweeney: Team Feels says: No comment.
Lor: Things get heavy:
Angel: You deserve something outside of demons and darkness. You should be with someone who can take you into the light. Someone who can make love to you.
Buffy: I don’t care about that.
Angel: You will. And children —
Buffy: Children? Can you say “jumping the gun?” I kill my goldfish!
Angel: Today. But you have no idea how fast it goes, Buffy. Before you know it, you’ll want it all. A normal life.
Buffy: I’ll never have a normal life.
Angel: Right. You’ll always be a Slayer. But that’s all the more reason why you should have a real relationship instead of this. This freak show.
Those last words, more than anything else, slam into Buffy. Sarah Michelle Gellar starts doing that wide-eyed confusion thing she does. B turns away to leave but Angel grabs her and apologizes. It kills him to say this all. “Then don’t,” Buffy counters. Who is Angel to decide what is right for her? She’s thought about this all, and she isn’t some swoony school girl. Angel is trying to think with his head and not his heart. Buffy: Heart? You have a heart? It isn’t even beating. And that was Buffy’s return volley. Ouch. She can’t stop loving him and she wants her life to be with him. Angel says he doesn’t. He’s leaving town. Buffy is shocked and the Plinkling Piano of Melancholy takes us out of this scene to shots of Buffy and Angel moping separately.
K: Now every single time Buffy has to go into the sewers to chase a demon/vamp/freak of the week, she’ll be all “Angel broke up with me down here. *cries*”
Lor: At least it’s the sewers and not some place actually happy.
Some time after, Willow sits on Buffy’s bed as she tells her that Angel is leaving town. Willow does her best friend duty of trying to make Angel the bad guy, especially for breaking up with B pre-prom. Buffy says, though, that in the long run, Angel is right and Willow agrees apologetically. She was hoping for the best for her friend and knows it must be horrible.
K: Risking possible death for going against the warning at the top of this post, Team Heartless Cow is so over this on again, off again “have all the emotions but none of the follow through on account of it causes soul loss” relationship this season that she has no fucks to give. Sorry.
Sweeney: We get it, cool kids. But since not even my Angel love can compete with my Buffy love, TEAM FEELS IS NOT SORRY IF WE SNOT ALL OVER YOU.
Lor: Especially because in that scene Buffy could’ve been talking about losing her favorite pencil, and my heart would’ve been broken. Because I love Buffy and Willow. So, yeah. HAVE SOME SNOT.
Dilapidated Domicile with the Drums of Doom and Deranged Doggy Demon. The Doggy Demon thrashes around his cages so much he manages to break free.
K: As proof that the special effects team used their full budget on the protective dome over the Box of Gavrok last week, because the Doggy Demons are literally just people in half-assed body suits wearing masks. Oh, Sunnydale. Don’t ever change.
Lor: Xander passes a shop window and again sees Cordelia, holding up the same dress from last episode. He goes in and thanks to a co-worker, Xander learns Cordelia works in the shop because she’s broke thanks to her daddy cheating on his taxes. She tangents about how she’s sure Xander is enjoying her misery, but is interrupted by the Doggy Demon breaking through the window into the shop. Xander, because he manages to be both awful and good in ways I have yet to understand, bravely tries to take out the DD, but he’s overpowered. The DD seems to consider Xander for a second before attacking a well-dressed extra.
Sweeney: Gotta take them out before they speak. Actors get way more expensive once they have lines.
Lor: Wiggins Library where the Scoobies are all watching the attack on security video. Cordy points out that the DD passed on Xander to go after the well dressed dude. Apparently, the well-dressed dude was ripped to shreds, even though it didn’t look like “ripped to shreds” exactly. More like this:
Buffy doesn’t want to see any more of the tape and Wesley lets us all know we are dealing with a hellhound. That’s practically what I called it! I’m so good at TV. They are vicious demon foot soldier trained to kill and eat brains. With absolutely no segue, Wesley wonders what Cordy and Xander were doing together at the store. Xander covers for Cordy.
Sweeney: I know Anya only had that one interaction with him up to now, but I’m still attributing all of Xander’s glory in this episode to her arrival.
Lor: On the video, the Scoobs notice a mysterious boy standing around looking villain-y. It’s a Sunnydale High student they identify as Tucker. Willow hacks into Tucker’s email and finds a threatening message about prom. Xander laments having bought a ticket and Willow wonders if she can return her dress. Buffy won’t sit and take that, though, and says that they are going to prom dammit. “I’m gonna give you a nice, fun, normal evening if I have to kill every single person on the face of the earth to do it.” Xander gives a fun eye-brow raise and “yay?”
After a fade to black, Buffy is a woman on a prom saving mission. She sends Wesley after Tucker. He’s all, “I could use some beautiful back-up with boobs,” and so Buffy tells Cordy to go with him. It almost happened that way, I promise. (K: She’s not kidding. It pretty much did.) Oz and Willow are going to track down the other guy Tucker was emailing about prom destruction, David. Xander gets magic shop duty, to see if anyone’s been buying supplies for hellhound raising. Buffy figures that Tucker’s been having to feed this Doggy Demon brains.
Cut to a slaughterhouse. Vegetarians look away! An employee gives Buffy an address for the strange dude who has been buying cow brains. Across the room, Angel is also here, buying blood. This is really the first time we’ve addressed Angel and blood, right? It’s kind of awkward to see him with a plastic shopping bag of it.
K: The butchers and abattoir workers of Sunnydale must know ALL the evil gossip, on account of they’re the ones who keep all the vampires and demons from starving to death!
Lor: Angel spots Buffy and asks how she is. “Right as rain” she lies through her teeth. She’s allowed to lie to him now that they are broken up. He starts to say that he misses her and she shuts that shit down real quick, because no. Fuck you. Also, she can’t be crippled by emotions right now; she’s saving the prom. He asks if she’s still going, and she is, but only to make sure no demonic doggies show up to slap fight people to death. Angel offers his help but she shuts that down too.
Cordelia is leaving work and her co-worker tells her not to forget her dress! Cordy says she didn’t actually finish paying for it, but someone did! Cordelia is shocked and we all know it was Xander and he continues to have an A+ episode.
Buffy returns to the Wiggins Library, where none of her cohorts had any luck. No worries! Buffy has the address and she sends them all to go get ready for prom. They protest, but she sternly sends them off to have fun. Giles tells her that going after Tucker is a little rash, but Buffy says that if he wants to go after the gang and tell them they can’t a perfect night with their dates, then he can. Giles is an excellent substitute-parent and deduces that Angel isn’t taking her. (S: As Sandy Cohen is the gold standard of Actual Parents, Giles is the bar that all Substitute Parents strive to reach.) “Angel is leaving me,” Buffy says. “He’s leaving town.” Giles takes a breath and says he’s sorry and damn it, I’m already tearing up again. I love me some understanding Giles. He says he doesn’t know what to say but that as he understands, “this sort of thing requires ice cream of some kind.” RIGHT YOU ARE.
K: I have no feels, but I’m always up for ice cream! That said, I agree that Understanding Giles is the best.
Lor: B says ice cream can wait (never) as prom saving, remember?
Sweeney: Sorry, I love this line so it gets direct quoted: Best thing about being a slayer? Kicking ass is comfort food. I love her. I mean, I’m still going to eat ice cream rather than go to the gym, but I love her.
Lor: She speaks to the girl in me who knows she should probably go to the gym instead. I often drown her in ice cream.
Prom. Xander walks in with Anya on his arm making vengeance demon small talk. Wesley and Giles are in front of the snack table. Wesley chokes as Cordelia enters in her gray dress with a killer slit up the leg. (K: #AWKWARDWESLEYBONER) Oz and Willow enter and they’re adorable. Wesley goes over to Cordy and compliments her and they walk off arm in arm. Anya continues to talk Xander’s ear off and they run into Cordy and Wesley. Xander compliments Cordy and they smile a little at each other. A dress for a little infidelity. I say they’re even. Giles watches the door anxiously but there’s no sign of Buffy.
Buffy is inside the Dilapidated Domicile. She attacks Tucker and notices the VHS tapes of Carrie, Pretty in Pink and Pump Up the Volume. Tucker is pretty pleased with himself and his Demon Doggy training. Buffy wants to know why he’d ruin prom and we get a flashback to Tucker asking a girl out and her saying, “no.” Imagine if she would’ve used more colorful words. Buffy apprehends Tucker easily and goes to lock him in a closet. There, she sees three empty crates. Three Demon Doggies are already on their way to prom.
Outside of Sunnydale High, Buffy shoots one Doggy with a crossbow. The other two give chase, but only until they hear the sweet stylings of Kool & The Gang’s “Celebration” coming from inside the school. Clearly, they head back towards the prom. Buffy finds them clawing at the gym door and she fights them. One she manages to knife in a way I don’t understand even after rewinding the scene twice. We’ll call it Prom Magic. Another well-dressed extra exits the gym and the sole remaining Demon Doggy starts to attack him, but Buffy grabs it by the leg, drags it away and snaps its neck. The well dressed extra squeaks out, “bathroom?” and Buffy points him down the hall. Buffy drags the doggy corpses out of the school, pulls out her prom dress and lets down her hair.
Inside, there is dancing and merry-making. Buffy enters in a pink dress. It isn’t ugly but it’s a smidge ill-fitting. Also, her hair looks lovely from the back, but from the front, it’s got these weird pieces at the front that make me want to find her some gel.
K: Which makes me sad for her, because the whole first half of the episode, I was like “DAMN. Buffy’s hair is kicking some serious butt in this episode”. Notable, of course, due to how horrific her hair has been this season. Awkward highlights, weird bangs, unfortunate 90s styling choices…
Sweeney: That’s a great point. Relative to the rest of this season, I give tonight’s hair a general win.
Lor: We fade to sometime later during the superlatives award ceremony. They crown some idiot class clown and Xander is miffed he didn’t win. Buffy is getting some punch, her back to the stage, seemingly not paying attention. Jonathan walks to the microphone and lowers it down to his height. He asks if Buffy Summers is present. She hesitates, then turns toward the stage warily. There prom-committee gave Jonathan this prepared statement:
Jonathan: We’re not good friends. Most of us never found the time to get to know you. But that doesn’t mean we haven’t noticed you. We don’t talk about it much, but it’s no secret that Sunnydale High isn’t really like other high schools. A lot of weird stuff happens here.
Student: Zombies!
Student: Hyena people!
Student: Snyder!
We’re shown Giles who smiles at Buffy so proudly and warmly. I can’t even.
Sweeney: +1. FEELS THAT CAN ONLY BE EXPRESSED IN GIFS.
Lor:
But whenever there was a problem, or something creepy happened, you seemed to show up and stop it. Most of the people here have been saved by you or helped by you at one time or another. We’re proud to say that the Class of ’99 has the lowest mortality rate of any graduating class in Sunnydale history, and we know at least part of that is because of you. So the senior class offers its thanks, and gives you, uh, this.
Jonathan grabs a small umbrella. “It’s from all of us, and it has written here, ‘Buffy Summers, Class Protector.” MY GOD THE TEARS.
The crowd parts for Buffy as she accepts her award. She smiles as they all clap for her, this strong, beautiful heroine who saved them all so recently, and did it with a broken heart. I’m sorry. That was morose. I CAN’T HELP IT THE TEARS MADE ME DO IT.
Sweeney: ALL. THE. TEARS.
K: Team Heartless Cow loves Jonathon’s speech and Proud Giles and the fact that Buffy gets recognition and generally finds this whole scene far more emotional than Heartbroken Buffy. However, Team Heartless Cow is SLIGHTLY confused about why it’s a shiny umbrella covered in tinsel…
Lor: Well, now you’re just TRYING to ruin things.
Giles is sitting down and Wesley comes over to sputter about asking Cordelia to dance. Giles: “For God’s sake, man, she’s eighteen, and you have the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone. Just have at it, would you, and stop fluttering about!” This was probably supposed to make me laugh and ease my feels, and I supposed I laughed, BUT I JUST LOVE GILES SO MUCH. IT GAVE ME MORE FEELS.
Sweeney: Once you fall down the feels hole, even the jokes give you feels.
Lor: Giles walks over to Buffy who is holding her little umbrella. He’s proud of her and surprised that her classmates were so gracious. Buffy says that sometimes people surprise you, and Giles, with his eyes on the entrance agrees. He grabs her umbrella and walks away. Buffy turns to see Angel in a tuxedo. You’ve come a long way since crushed velvet jackets, Angel. A long way.
Sweeney: TUXEDO ANGEL. BE STILL MY NOTEBOOK DOODLING HEART.
Lor: Well, now I have to include this:
They approach each other and Buffy says she didn’t expect him to show. “It’s a big night. I didn’t want to miss it,” he says. He starts to warn her that it’s only a one-night thing but Buffy stops him. She understands. He asks her to dance. The camera pans around them, and as they hold each other, we see shots of Willow lovingly stroking Oz’s hair, Jonathan with his date, and Wesley and Cordelia. Buffy leans on Angel’s chest as a cover of The Rolling Stone’s “Wild Horses” sends us off.
K: It occurs to me that maybe the reason this episode doesn’t give me ALL THE FEELS is that a) my Year 12 formal took place in June. We graduated in December. Therefore, it didn’t really have that “end of an era” feel about it. And b) I went to a girls’ school, and the only boys I knew were my younger brother’s friends. As a result, I went to the formal with my cousin. If you think that wasn’t seriously awkward turtle, you’d be wrong. Because we have the same surname, so my whole class was like “OMG, KIRSTI’S SECRETLY MARRIED.” Yeah. That happened. Basically, if I’d been in Buffy’s shoes, I would have been all “Yup. Cancel the prom. No one needs that shit.” </random personal segue>
Lor: I don’t think you have to be able to relate to something completely to feel the feels. I didn’t even go to my senior prom. I mean, I’m laughing at your story with your cousin (and K even emailed us photographic evidence and it was HILARIOUS) but your argument is denied.
My argument: This episode was a lovely end for them. In fact, it really serves to highlight the problems I had with Angel and Buffy’s evolution in season 3. This could’ve been even more effective had there not been all that silly on and off again throughout the season. I know that commenters and shippers and all of you who have seen past season three have your opinions on who is best with Buffy. Rather, which characters “belong” together. I can’t speak for any of that, obviously, and I don’t want to. Everyone has there opinions. Here is what I can offer: Angel was a big part of why I fell in love with Buffy.
Sweeney: I love this episode so much. There are no words, only feels.
Next time on Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Graduation day get closer and Faith hits too close to home for Buffy in S03 E21 – Graduation Day, Part 1.
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
Nicole is the co-captain of Snark Squad and these days she spends most of her time editing podcasts. She spends too much time on Twitter and very occasionally vlogs and blogs. In her day job she's a producer, editor, director, and sometimes host of educational YouTube channels. She loves travel, maps, panda gifs, and semicolons. Writing biographies stresses her out; she crowd sourced this one years ago and has been using a version of it ever since. She would like to thank Twitter for their help.
I'm a 30-something librarian and I still live with my parents because I'm super broke. Leader of Team Heartless Cow. I have an inexplicable love for 90s television, eat too much chocolate, and read more than is good for me.
