Charmed S01 E20 – The Prosiness of Two

Previously: Andy finally found out about the Halliwell powers.
—

The Power of Two

Marines: Halliwell Manor. Piper and Prue rush around trying to locate things like lip gloss and a plane ticket– things that Phoebe has all arranged in front of her, perched up on a table in the hall. She grabs each item and concentrates. When she does this with the ticket, she has a premonition of Piper watching a plane take off. If that’s SFO, I’d really love to know how she knew from outside that one of the planes taking off was hers.

Phoebe snaps out of it and her sisters discover that she has the very items they are looking for. She tells them the wonderful news that she was trying to have a premonition on command and it worked. The bad news is that Piper is going to miss her flight. Probably because you stole her crap, Phoebe.

Piper exposits that she’s going to Honolulu for work, but she didn’t have time to do things like pay the bills or cancel her hair appointment. Phoebe volunteers to get her to-do list done. Piper realizes that Prue and Phoebe have never been alone together and wonders what happens if they need the power of 3. Prue is all, “the power of 3 is pretty much a sham of a plot device. We’ll be fine.” (Something like that.) As Prue and Piper hurry out the door, they leave Phoebe with a few more things to add to her chore list.

Phoebe boo-hoos about being a “housewife” even though she’s unmarried. The phone rings and Phoebe greets Marianne, saying she totally forgot about Alcatraz but won’t be able to make it, due to the errands SHE VOLUNTEERED TO DO. She takes that back and decides to go. Then she crumples up the to-do list and throws it into the living room like the brat that she is.

Alcatraz. A Floating Woman taunts a ghost-man named Jackson because he’s been stuck on the island since his execution 36 years before. Jackson says it’s no big, because he’s learned to break the physical plane in that time, which is perfect for things like kicking cans and revenge taking. Floaty says that revenge is so mortal and Jackson tells her to go to hell. It’s a perfect-totally-not-at-all-clunky opening for Floaty to announces that going to hell is her day job. She ferries souls there. And! Listen to this: she doesn’t want Jackson’s soul, she wants a witch’s soul. Her totally-brillaint-not-at-all-clunky plan is to get Jackson off the island so he can get his revenge which will of course lead a witch to try and stop him and of course the only way for the witch to do so is for her to make herself vulnerable to Floaty. I hope you followed all that. Not really, because I’m sure we can make it through this episode without understanding much.

SPEAKING OF WITCHES! She smells one now! Phoebe is on the tour looking pretty bored. The tour guide says something about a ghost and then locks himself in a cell. Floaty does something to him that makes him pass out (THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS) and Phoebe freaks out because she can see the ghosts. She is talking to them too, making everyone else on the tour think she’s nuts. Jackson jumps into Tour Guide’s body and Floaty says she’ll see Phoebe later.

I AM THE SAHN.

Moody 90’s music takes us through a scene where the coroner is taking away Tour Guide’s body and Phoebe is giving a statement to the police.

Buckland. Prue is in a meeting and Claire basically tells her to buckle down and stop having so many family emergencies. Buckland has some potential buyers and Prue has to make a big impression. An assistant pokes her head in to say that Prue’s sister is on the phone with an emergency.

Phoebe asks Prue if she’s ever heard of the Ghost of Alcatraz. Not that she saw this ghost because she was totally not at Alcatraz, but her friend Marianne saw two ghosts there. Phoebe did a little research and found out that some ghosts need a dead body to transport them across water. Claire comes out to glare at Prue so she loudly tells Phoebe that she’s going to have to handle the furnace explosion by herself. She whispers for her not to forget to buy tampons at the market and hangs up.

LOLPD. Morris asks if Andy took any case files home ’cause some are missing and he’s hoping the captain isn’t the one reviewing them. Morris asks why Andy has been walking around like a zombie since he saw Prue again, but Andy can’t tell him anything. We complained in comments last episode about how the detectives didn’t seem to answer to anyone so here: a woman walks in with a case for them! That’s something! She explains that a victim was stabbed in the chest 13 times. The knife found at the scene had Jackson’s ultraviolet fingerprint on it. Except, you know, he’s dead. Andy takes the file and runs.

Prue gets home and none of the to-do list items are done. Phoebe says she knows she promised to do it, but she got side-tracked and this other thing seemed more important. Then, she asks Prue if they are going to fight about something so soon and I really, really dislike her. There was a moment there when I thought, “maybe I don’t hate her,” but no, friends. I think I do. Prue looks at her like she might punch her in the face.

Andy visits. Prue wasn’t sure she’d see him again and he’s all, “well… I’m here for a case.” He explains about the dead guy murder and Phoebe is all over it. She tells them about the Ghost of Alcatraz and how Jackson was the last person executed at Alcatraz. Except 10 seconds of Google searching quickly informed me that 0 inmates were executed at Alcatraz. COOL, CHARMED WRITERS.

Phoebe explains the ultraviolet fingerprint as ghost ectoplasm and confirms with a picture that Jackson was indeed the ghost ahem her friend Marianne saw. Andy is a little freaked out by the ghost thing and wonders out loud how he’s supposed to stop this killer.

Jackson ghost-walks into the office of a Judge Renault. Hilariously, Jackson turns off the lights in his office and Renault just turns on his desk light and keeps working. Jackson chokes and stabs the judge who convicted him. Floaty shows up and says that now that Jackson has gotten his revenge, he needs to help her get a witch. Jackson laughs because he’s just getting started.

Andy and Morris are on the scene the next day. Morris is doing his rational, disbelieving thing while Andy is sure that the ultraviolet prints on the murder weapon will belong to Jackson. Andy’s off to put together a list of potential victims.

Buckland. The buyers are waiting on Prue who comes in late. She’s only introduced to one person before Andy also comes in and takes her away from her very important meeting. Outside, he explains that Jackson has killed again. Prue marches back into the meeting to presumably excuse herself.

Halliwell Manor. Phoebe is up in the attic looking through the Book Shadows, when Prue walks in with Andy. Phoebe is all, “HELLO? BIG SECRET!” but it’s okay because that thing is only like 43% useful.

Phoebe tells Prue that she only found one remotely useful thing. In order to vanquish the evil spirit, they have to get on the astral plane, meaning that one of them has to die. Prue’s like, “nah. Keep looking.” Andy meanwhile is shocked again because this is all too incredible to believe. And by incredible maybe he means, “seriously, how does this world of terrible magic plots exist?” I don’t know, Andy. I don’t know.

While he’s standing in front of it, the Book of Shadows opens up to a page by itself! HUZZAH! I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THAT TO HAPPEN! Prue tries to say that it happens sometimes, but no it doesn’t. They are always blindly flipping through pages. Anyway, the book opens up to the truth spell Prue used on Andy and she tries to be all, “nothing to see here,” and flips away from it. Phoebe, the worst sister ever invented and all around annoying turd, flips back to it and says there must be a reason it happened.

Cut to Andy heading down the stairs, yelling at Prue for the truth spell.

 

 

 

Andy asks how much time she gave him to react to the truth and she admits it was a minute. But a very telling minute. He says he deserved more time.

Phoebe comes downstairs and says that they don’t know how to vanquish Jackson yet, but they can stop him from killing his next victim. She stops short and is all, “oh, am I interrupting something?” HOW IS SHE THIS OBTUSE? Anyway, Andy asks how they can stop the next killing and Phoebe says she has a power too. Barely, girl. Barely.

LOLPD. Andy checks out the murder weapon from the judge-killing. After he leaves, the cop on evidence duty tattles on him. Andy next checks in with Morris who has that list of potential next victims started. Andy grabs the list and runs off without giving Morris any information about what he’s doing. When he leaves, Morris is approached by two inspectors from Internal Affairs, investigating Andy.

Outside, Andy climbs in Prue’s car and hands the murder weapon to Phoebe. She explains how her visions work and then does the thing. In her vision, she sees Jackson stabbing an older lady. Phoebe snaps out of it and says that she actually felt the lady’s terror this time. Oh, great girl! Your powers are growing and becoming even lamer. Not only do you have to see people in trouble, YOU HAVE TO FEEL PEOPLE IN TROUBLE? WORST. Phoebe looks through Andy’s pictures of potential victims and finds the old lady.

We cut to Jackson just about to murder her face off when Prue, Phoebe and Andy bust in. Phoebe uses a Very Useful Kick to get the knife away from Jackson and Prue telekinesises it out of his reach. Jackson says they can’t save themselves forever and leaves. Andy meanwhile just goes, “Prue? What’s happening? Prue? Prue?” for the whole scene.

When the girls get home they are fighting over the fact that Phoebe lied about going to Alcatraz. Phoebe thinks the real reason Prue is angry is because she didn’t do that to-do list and Prue probably thinks she slacks off all day long. (Um, she doesn’t?) Prue says she’s sorry for asking her to do things while she’s at work. Phoebe goes off on a whole rant about how they assume she’ll do things around the house because she doesn’t have a real job, which isn’t fair. Maybe she has a point? I can’t tell over the sound of her annoying.

Piper calls and says she’s working hard, but really she’s surrounded by TV Hawaii, relaxing.

 

 

After the phone call, Prue says they have to put away their issues and figure out how to defeat Jackson. She asks if they just reached a compromised and Phoebe rolls her eyes and looks away.

LOLPD. Andy tells the Old Lady that they are going to put her in a hotel until the investigation is over. Andy tells her they should keep the ghost thing a secret. Morris asks Andy AGAIN what’s going on and Andy says AGAIN that he can’t say. This makes for really compelling TV. Morris tells Andy about the internal affairs investigation.

Manor. Prue and Phoebe find a potion for luring evil spirits. It involves the blood of one of his victims and his grave in Palo Alto.

We cut there. The girls are a little jumpy and when they hear a strange sound, Prue says it’s probably a vampire or zombie. “Great,” Phoebe says. “Where’s Buffy when you need her?” SHE’S BUSY ON BEING ON A FAR SUPERIOR SHOW. (This episode originally aired one day after The Prom. FAR. SUPERIOR.) (I appreciate the shout-out, though.)

 

ANYWAY. The girls locate his grave, leave a picture of themselves, splash the potion, and run.

Jackson is about to get his murder on again when his chest starts burning and melting. Floaty appears to be all, “sucks to be you,” and tells him to find the witches, he needs to visit his grave.

That night, Andy takes his secret Prue file out of his desk and tries to get it out of there, but he’s intercepted by the dudes of Internal Affairs. They question Andy about all his unsolved cases and accuse him of specializing in freaky cases. Andy gets fed up and tells them to either charge him or drop dead.

Manor. Prue is wearing what looks like a cardigan that is too small for her and is pulling between the buttons, but she isn’t wearing anything underneath it. I… words… fail.

Prue is making a concoction to stop her heart. She says she’ll be fine as long as someone administers CPR within four minutes. They have their touching sister moment in which Prue says she takes her sister for granted. Mid-feels talk, Claire calls and fires Prue via answering machine.

Jackson shows up. Phoebe says she’ll hold him off while Prue dies. Phoebe promptly gets knocked out; Prue successfully dies. Her spirit climbs out of her body and starts chanting the vanquishing spell. Andy arrives and sees a knocked out Phoebe. He checks on her and then finds a dead Prue. He starts CPR on her but too soon. Thankfully, Jackson can’t wait to get his murdering on, and comes for Andy with a cake knife. Prue calls out to him, which I guess he hears, Andy sees the knife, deflects, and this allows Prue enough time to say the spell one final time. Floaty appears to collect Jackson’s soul.

 

 

 

Prue is alive, Phoebe comes to, and the ghost is gone.

Buckland. Claire is all, “no, for real, you’re fired.” Andy busts in and lies that Prue has been helping with an investigation and she couldn’t say anything because it was secret. Claire buys this and I guess rehires her. Cool.

Andy and Prue go back to her office. He tells her that the truth is that one day he wants to settle down to boring life, a wife and kids, and definitely no demons. Prue understands. If she could avoid it, she would too.

Manor. Prue says she burned Andy’s case file. Phoebe wonders how Andy could’ve heard spirit!Prue.

Piper’s home! She took an early flight because she was worried but her sisters say nothing interesting happened while she was gone. I couldn’t agree more.

 

 

Next time on Charmed: Leo shows up again and Piper uses a spell to gain his powers in S01 E20 – Love Hurts.