Previously: Ezra trapped Aria in a ski lift so they could have a totally normal relationship chat.
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She’s Come Undone
Marines: Aria cries as she fills her friends in on the ever-increasing creepiness of Ezra Fitz. See, he didn’t kiss a random girl and THEN find out she was 16. He knew all along that she was a minor but he’s awful and decided to exploit her anyway. Additionally, he had a “brief” relationship with Alison when she was 14. So. I actually just got really, really gaggy.
Sara: It seems like the word ‘relationship’ is not really accurate considering it was between a FOURTEEN YEAR OLD and a grown man in college. Gross gross gross gross.
Mari: Aria has only read bits of Ezra’s story, enough to believe that he didn’t kill Alison, but he does have a theory that one of the Liars did. The girls are all shocked. Spencer asks who he’s trying to pin it on but Aria didn’t read that far and didn’t think to ask. Her stupid logic is that knowing who is being accused of murder “doesn’t matter” because they know it isn’t true. Emily points out that Ezra could be a horrible person and also A, but Aria stands up for him. “Ezra’s not A. He’s a writer who found a great opportunity to make a name for himself and he used me. He used us.”
Yeah, I still think that’s putting it lightly.
Jessica: Thanks Emily, maybe he’s still A! Keep the dream alive.
Mari: The girls chalk all his stalker equipment in Ravenswood to his “research” for the book. Except it’s the illegal, stalker kind. Emily figures that Ezra knew about A all along and never said anything. Aria cries and says that Ezra never really loved her.
SHHHH.
Aria is brooding in bed and she flashes back to her first meeting with Ezra in which he tells us he just graduated from Hollis. NO ONE BELIEVES YOU, SHOW. We watch the rest of the scene until Ezra says he’d like to know more about Aria. In the present, she starts out of bed and runs to the waste basket to throw up. I KNOW, ARIA. I TOLD YOU IT MADE ME GAGGY TOO. (J: Ditto!) (S: Three out of three Snark ladies need to barf!)
Spencer comes downstairs to find both her parents waiting in the kitchen. This makes her suspicious because her parents are barely ever around and barely ever together. Her father quickly outs with news that they are sending her to a rehab center in Philly because they know she’s taking pills again. Spencer begs them not to send her. This relapse isn’t as bad as the last time and she doesn’t want rehab and Radley on her (life?) record as she’s applying to colleges. (S: Does this stuff actually go on your record, or is this another stupid PLL plot?) She promises to kick the habit herself and her parents agree under the conditions that she take the withdrawal medication under their supervision and she come straight home after school every day.
Rosewood High for Students with a Lot of Legal Problems. Hanna finds Travis (no, I did not at all remember this guy’s name. Thanks, Google!) at his locker, looking even more like a Bargain Wentworth Miller now that he’s in a suit. She apologizes for kissing him and he tries to be all, “it’s cool!” and walk away, but Hanna follows. Travis explains that he doesn’t have time to chat because he’s off to court. Wilden was blackmailing his dad for a reason and I guess now that reason has come to the light? I’m not sure. Hanna apologizes to him, but Travis says it isn’t Hanna’s fault.
Jessica: Love to know that the Rosewood PD has its priorities straight. “We still don’t know who killed that teenaged girl or Detective Wilden, but we do know why Wilden was blackmailing this small business owner, so let’s do that!”
Mari: Emily spots Spencer half-napping on a bench in the hallway. I bet she could spend the entire day there and not a teacher or authority figure would notice. (S: Unless that authority figure wanted to inappropriately flirt with her, of course.)
Suddenly, Aria storms past them and into the school. (J: She’s wearing her skull shirt, so we know she’s mad!) Spencer and Emily follow after her. Without slowing down, Aria tells them that she means to confront Ezra. The girls don’t think doing that at school is wise, but Aria’s got crazy eyes right now and storms into his classroom anyway. There is a substitute teacher. Aria demands to know where Ezra is and the sub says he took time off for a family emergency. Aria storms back out and now Hanna’s there too. Class is definitely going on, but of course our Liars just all happen to be hanging out about the school. Aria yells that she’s TOTALLY OKAY BIG EYES BIG EYES BIG EYES, but her friends look at her with enough, “no. Girl. Stop.” that she at least agrees to let Emily drive her home.
Spencer abandons that whole school thing and decides to go visit Toby. She brings cronuts as a peace offering and Toby says they sound disgusting. I’ve never had one, but I think they sound amazing. This is probably why he has Dem Abs and I have Dem Flab. Spencer apologizes for ruining their date the previous night, but Toby is more concerned with her pill habit. Spencer says she has it all under control and she’s totally done with pills.
Jessica: Meanwhile, I’m more and more fascinated by his hair. How long does he take to style it each morning? Is he still a carpenter? I can’t imagine spending all that time just to wear a hard hat.
Mari: Still at school, Paige calls Emily over. I can’t tell if they are together or not right not and it’s not like I remember. Paige wants to hang out, but Emily says she has errands and then has to go check-up on Aria. Emily says they can meet after all that and have dinner together. Emily opens her purse to get her cell phone out and the envelope of Alison’s money is all open and hanging out in her purse. Paige asks about it and Emily lies about her grandma giving her cash for her birthday. Paige is suspicious. Also, she looks fantastic with this longer hair. (S: SO MUCH BETTER.)
Aria goes to Ezra’s apartment and lets herself in. He isn’t there, so Aria starts rifling through his things. She finds a pretty elaborate timeline of events surrounding Alison’s disappearance, and boxes of files, including one dedicated solely to her. She also finds some tapes and a reel to reel tape recorder. She clicks it on and the tape is of Alison saying that she’s safe for the moment, but telling whomever is recording that he cannot tell anyone he helped her.
LOLPD. Hanna apparently came over to convince Detective Holbrook that Travis’s dad only committed a little bit of a crime a few times. This is what happens when you flirt with minors, Holbrook; they think they can cut school to come find you in the middle of the day and tell you how to do your job. So annoying, amIright? Hanna pulls out the guilt trip card and reminds Holbrook that when a cop wants to make your life impossible, there isn’t much you can do. She’s referring to Travis’s dad and Wilden, but also that one time Holbrook thought her mother was a murderer. He suddenly realizes that maybe he should be discussing this case with Hanna. She tells him that the fact that Wilden was a corrupt cop must count for something. Holbrook says his job is to state the facts, not his opinion.
Jessica: “I shouldn’t be talking to you about this case.” – Detective Holbrook, AFTER talking to Hanna about this case
Mari: Aria is still going through Ezra’s stuff and she finds his stalker journal. It makes her cry some more. When she sees “Aria doesn’t suspect a thing,” she gets really angry and starts trashing the apartment. THROW SOME STUFF FOR ME TOO ARIA. THIS IS HOW I FEEL ABOUT EZRA ALWAYS. ALSO, MAYBE GRAB SOME EVIDENCE AGAINST HIM.
Sara: I’m going to need way more than a few broken lamps and picture frames to fully feed my wrath. Flip the couch over! Cut all the buttons out of his shirts! DOG EAR ALL HIS BOOKS.
We cut to the Pedopartment where the other Liars find Aria just sitting on the floor amongst the mess. They get her up and Spencer, bless her heart, asks if they shouldn’t COLLECT SOME OF THIS EVIDENCE. Hanna is all, “not now, Aria is having feelings.” Spencer still grabs a handful of stuff because I guess a little bit is better than nothing.
Emily is making the PO Box drop and she’s being watched.
At the courthouse, Travis is surprised to find Hanna waiting for him. Holbrook comes out of the courtroom (or bathroom?) and gives them a little nod. Travis says that Holbrook spoke up for his dad, resulting in some probation instead of jail time. Travis has to go be with his dad, but he thanks Hanna before he goes.
Jessica: Be careful Hanna. PD bribery is a slippery slope, as your mom knows too well.
Mari: In her room, Spencer is going through her handful of evidence. It included a business card for Marc Pope, a private investigator. On the back of the card is the note, “P.I. who followed Spencer?” Spencer calls the number and gets a voicemail box with the recorded message, “Pope Private Eye. Leave a message, we’ll find you.” Um, creeps. She hangs up quickly and then collapses in bed with some withdrawal pain. She pulls out the pills that A left her and pops a couple.
Jessica: I’m waiting for another Spencer drug dream. Come on any second. Maybe the next one will be a groovy ’60s psychadelic thing.
Sara: My fingers are crossed for a futuristic sci-fi dream!
Mari: C.) All of the above.
At the PO Box, Paige confronts Emily about being a lying liar. Emily leads her outside where Paige asks lots of questions about what the heck Emily is doing and why she’s leaving money for “A.D. Incorporated.” Real stealth name there, Alison DiLaurentis. Paige grabs the money and threatens to take it to the police so Emily admits that Alison is alive.
Aria is the biggest idiot of all time and is burning pages from Ezra’s Big Journal of EVIDENCE. OMG WHY. I hate these girls. I know Aria is feeling really bad and all, but the best revenge would be CHARGES AGAINST HIM. Somehow, in a way I didn’t follow because there was rage ringing in my ears, talk turns back to the tape which they remind me was Alison talking to Grunwald. Yeah, I really, really didn’t remember that. Aria doesn’t understand how Ezra got his hands on the tape. Hanna is hungry so Aria tells her to go get food because she’ll totally be fine alone and probably won’t, I don’t know, storm into any schools or destroy any apartments if she’s left alone. Hanna grabs the journal from Aria and tells her to wait before burning anymore of it.
Paige can’t believe Emily never told her about this Alison thing. Paige tells Emily that she’s putting herself in danger. Emily risks it because Alison needs her. Paige reminds Em that Ali used and abused them. Emily makes all kinds of excuses for Alison, saying she definitely isn’t as manipulative as she used to be. Paige, bless her too, is all, “SHE’S FAKED HER DEATH FOR 2 YEARS. OF COUSE SHE’S STILL MANIPULATIVE.” The caps lock are mainly me, but a little bit Paige. She threatens to tell the DiLaurentis family that Ali is still alive but Emily says that can’t happen! For reasons! And because she’s hiding from A! And stuff. Emily would never forgive Paige if something happened to Alison. Paige says fine, she’ll stay quiet if Emily cuts off communication with Alison.
One Coffee Shop. Hanna runs into Detective Holbrook and thanks him for speaking up for Travis’s dad. They smile at each other and then hug. Hanna follows it up with a kiss and this is not the first time she’s done this. Hanna, what are you doing?
Holbrook jumps back all, “WHAT. NO.” Hanna apologizes and takes off.
Sara: I have to admit, I was caught off guard that a grown man was not cool with a minor kissing him. Rosewood has ruined me.
Spencer goes downstairs and her father in the kitchen. She tells him that she was thinking about the night Ali went missing because she can only remember pieces of it. She was taking the pills back then too. One moment she was in the house fighting with Ali and the next thing she remembers, she was outside telling the girls that Ali was gone. She pulls out the card for the PI. It’s the same PI Papa Hastings hired to follow Melissa. Spencer cry-asks if he hired that PI to follow her too. Does he think she had something to do with Alison’s murder? Papa Hastings non-answers about what a hard time Spencer is having with the withdrawal and then is spared further bad parenting by a knock at the door.
It’s Toby. Papa Hastings is overly bright as he suggest they go take a walk. Spencer doesn’t want to talk a walk; she wants the truth. Papa Hastings doesn’t care. Spencer storms out.
Emily agrees to Paige’s demand to stay away from Ali, as long as she can drop off the envelope.
Aria picks up Ezra’s journal and flips through it again, this time to the back. In it is a single sheet of paper from a literary agent. The letter says that Random House loved his latest installment and the agent wants to talk about the ending. Aria calls the agency and pretends to be someone who works with Ezra. She asks for the publication date of the book so they can throw him a party. The helpful lady on the phone says there isn’t one yet, but Ezra is in the office discussing that with the literary agent at that moment. Aria hangs up.
Jessica: I’m about as mad at Ezra’s literary success as I am about E. L. James’.
Mari: A+
Later that night, Toby returns to the Hastings House because he lost Spencer. We cut to Spencer arriving at the DiLaurentis house. She demands to know if Mrs. D saw her hurting Ali or perhaps guiltily standing near or around a shovel. Mrs. D just tells her she looks rough and moves to call her parents. Spencer grabs her arm and asks the question again. Mrs. D tells her to leave immediately.
Hanna pulls up somewhere just as Aria does. Aria gets out of the car and is storming off, explaining to Hanna that Ezra lied about destroying the book to save their relationship. NOW she knows that everything Ezra has ever said is a lie. NOW. Not like 5 boxes of stalker files, one ski-lift trap and a purposeful meet-cute ago. Now.
Aria is marching to Principal Hackett’s house to confess everything about her relationship with Ezra. Hanna is all, “but Ezra will go to jail!” Not that she’s taking his side or anything, but she asksAria to think about the fact that this will affect her family too. Whatever. I don’t care because I don’t actually believe anything bad will ever happen to Ezra. (J: Ugh. Worst because true.)
Sara: RAGE RAGE RAGE. Ezra should go to jail because he stalked a goddamn teenager so that he could sleep with her and write a book about her and EXCUSE ME BUT I AM STARTING TO HULK OUT.
Mari: Principal Hackett looks outside, and no one is there.
Aria is storming away from Hanna again, this time on the way back to her car. Aria tells Hanna to get lost because she wants to be by herself BIG EYES BIG EYES BIG EYES. Hanna relents and Aria drives away. (J: Aria gives the best crazy eyes)
Toby waits with the Hastings parents until Spencer shows up. Toby tells her that she needs help and she goes upstairs without a word.
Emily visits Aria and finds her packing a bag. She doesn’t know where she’s going, but she tells Emily to move out of her way and leave her alone.
Spencer cries in her room.
Paige leaves an anonymous letter for the LOLPD saying that Alison DiLaurentis is definitely alive and they should start searching under the super stealthy name A.D. Incorporated.
A-nonymous. A flips through a few pages of Ezra’s manuscript and them puts them in a fire. Seems about right for something Ezra wrote. (S: LOL.)
Next time: Aria hooks up with a random and Spencer goes to rehab in Pretty Little Liars S04 E22 – Cover for Me.
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
I'm a 30-something with three kids who spends an embarrassing amount of time watching teen television dramas. There's a whole lot of Internet out there, and I plan on reading all of it before I die.
I'm a chronic book nerd and love storytelling in all forms. I'm particularly excited by the rise of the television show as an art form with long, cinematically beautiful plots and complex character arcs (I also watch cartoons). My travels in the past handful of years have led me through three continents and most recently landed me among the majestic mountains of Colorado. Some day I will compile all my travel journals/blogs into one place. Some day. Until then, you can find me with craft beer in hand, ready at any moment to deeply and passionately discuss survival tactics for the zombie apocalypse.
