Previously: Aria couldn’t stop watching Shana’s funeral on YouTube.
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Miss Me x 100
Jessica: So this is the 100th episode of this show. Let’s do a quick round-up of what we know after approximately a century’s worth of episodes.
Question 1: Is Alison alive?
Answer: Yes!
Question 2: Who is A?
Answer: No freaking clue.
Ok good, you’re all caught up. On to the episode! (M: This is my favorite thing that’s ever happened.)
Marin Manor- backyard. Travis is looking through a telescope while Hanna, bless her, is more concerned about the dress code for the presentation (presumably for a class thing they’re doing together– hello contrivance, my old friend). Travis tries to bring things back around to astronomy, but Hanna’s distracted, because tomorrow is Ali’s first day back at school. And we know actual school won’t be happening, obviously.
Mari: Seriously, they are all freaking out when they spend a grand total of 5 minutes at lunch, 2 minutes in the hallway and 1 minute near or around a classroom every other day. It will be okay.
J: Hanna’s worried people will think she and the other Liars are still Ali’s puppets, like before. Travis tries to reassure her, but it doesn’t really work. Nice try, guy.
Still night, Rosewood’s Main Street. Aria and Ezra are taking a nighttime stroll because he’s a vampire. Just kidding, but wouldn’t that be great? (M: I do already dislike him as much as Spike!) Aria says Shana is haunting her for accidentally push-murdering her. Ezra, ever helpful, says it’s Aria’s own fault she’s feeling guilty, and he wishes he could fix it for her– like make her a soulless creep like yourself? Sorry, I’ll try to reign it in. Aria seems to find this sweet, as she brushes back his bangs, then stops herself and keeps walking.
Aria continues that she’s just waiting for another blackmail text from A, maybe a photo of her standing over a dead body. Finally, finally one of the Liars may have learned something in 100 episodes! A is everywhere and never going away!
They stop suddenly as they see Ali chatting with the driver of a car, facing away from them so they can’t see who it is. Aria calls out and the car drives away. Alison asks if this nighttime stroll is a date and Aria and Ezra say no rather unconvincingly. Ali claims her dad dropped her off at his office to pick up some forms for school tomorrow.
Ezra bumbles through an apology about Ali’s mom as the city bus pulls up in the background. When it drives away, the music gives us a dramatic entry to Jenna, complete with dark sunglasses and cane. She and Ali have a stare-off (or Ali does and Jenna happens to be facing in the right direction), and the music continues to assure us that this is A Big Deal.
SHHHHH.
Hastings Household. Spencer is making tea, and Toby is back! With longer, much worse hair. (M: How does his hair keep getting worse? It seems impossible and then it happens.)(J: With this, plus Hanna’s new-but-totally-the-same hairdo last episode, I have no idea what’s going on with the hair on this show.) Spencer shares that her dad has been avoiding her. A+ parenting once again from Shitbag Hastings!
Toby gets in an F. Scott Fitzgerald reference as things turn to Alison. Spencer says she believes Ali when she says her ordeal changed her, though Spencer points out they still don’t know exactly what that was, since Ali’s made up the kidnapping story. Toby says he’s all for second chances, but also for getting rid of someone toxic. Speaking of, his phone rings and it’s Jenna. He hasn’t talked to her since she moved to New York, but answers anyway. He says he’ll be right there and hangs up. “Shana’s dead,” he says. So now people care about this? I always forget that time, hours, days, weeks, move differently in Rosewood.
Mari: Her funeral was on YouTube. Why did no one else know that Shana was dead? Surely she had friends or family in Rosewood. No? Okay.
J: IT WAS ON YOUTUBE. Let us never forget that fact.
Later. All the Liars and Ali are gathered at I think Spencer’s house. Spencer isn’t sure what to tell Toby, but Aria says the truth. Alison looks upset because she loves lies so much she wants to marry them, but the other Liars back Aria up and tell Spencer it’s her decision.
Hanna sums the situation up: “Let’s face it. We blinded Jenna, killed her girlfriend, and she’s back to punish us for it.”
Mari: That’s not untrue but why doesn’t anyone remember the, “they were stalking us, making our lives impossible and she came after us with a gun” portion of this story?
J: Probably because they keep losing evidence and also don’t use their words, ever.
Ali says she didn’t know that Jenna was living in New York, which means Shana lied when she said Jenna didn’t know that she was coming after them. They’re pretty sure Jenna is back in Rosewood to finish what Shana started. So, I guess basically, to kill them all.
They bemoan the fact that even with A dead (ha!) they still have to deal with all kinds of crap. Namely, a blind girl wanting to murder their faces off. #RosewoodProblems
Alison returns us to the main episode topic, saying that the Liars have done so much to help her against all her enemies, but tomorrow in school she’s going to try to make amends to everyone she hurt, which I imagine is a large list. Aria wonders if that includes Jenna, and Ali doesn’t answer. (M: Let’s not get crazy.)
Next morning. DiLaurentis Domicile. Ali’s putting on makeup and psyching her up in the mirror. “I’ve been through a lot worse,” she says. “You can do this.”
High School of Why Do Any Of You Still Go There?? The Liars are waiting nervously outside, arguing over whether or not Ali is coming. When she arrives, she walks through a crowd of people staring and whispering. The Liars can’t tell whether the people love her or hate her, as Ali stops to talk to two frizzy-haired girls who she used to make fun of.
Paige is watching too, and Sydney comes up to watch the “Queen of Mean” hand out hugs to the two girls. Paige is fed up and walks off, while Mona and Lucas watch evilly from the sidelines. Ali approaches the Liars and thanks them for waiting for her. The music swells as the five of them walk in slow motion down the hall, while everyone stares and moves aside. You can just tell that the show makers have been waiting LITERALLY 100 EPISODES to do this. So, you know, appreciate it, people.
Mari: Because the concept of moving is worthy of a cut to black, obviously.
J: Elsewhere, Hanna and Lucas are attending cla— no wait, they’re walking around and talking. Lucas wants to talk about anything not Alison, and mentions his totally-a-person girlfriend is coming into town, and invites Hanna to his party to introduce her to all his friends… that he has now that he was homeschooled… ? Hanna’s in if she can bring Travis, and heads off. Lucas makes a suspicious phone call.
Mari: See also: Lucas is suspicious and makes a phone call.
J: Hastings Household. Spencer’s watching in shock as her mom packs her clothes. She asks if Melissa is joining them but Mariska Mom will only answer questions once they get to the hotel. Spencer says she’ll help if she knows WTF is going on. MM says that she never checked in to the spa that Shitbag Hastings sent her to, but has been working with a private investigator, and learned that Shitbag and Melissa both lied about their whereabouts on the night Mrs. DiLaurentis was killed.
MM is upset because she and SH promised never to involve Melissa or Spencer in …. activities unspecified, since she trails off. She starts to cry and Spencer promises they’ll take care of each other and they hug.
Rosewood High School of Now It’s Lunchtime I Guess. Emily leaves a message for Spencer. They haven’t seen Ali though she texted that she’s in “guidance counselor hell.” Aria brings up that she had the brilliant idea of going to Jenna’s after school. Her guilt has resurfaced and she feels like maybe she can help. Both Hanna and Emily think this is a terrible idea, but this is Aria so nothing they say sinks in. She storms off.
Swim practice. Sydney convinces Emily to go to a Frozen sing-along hosted by the Glee club that night, and Emily reluctantly agrees so long as she can hum instead of sing. Sydney leaves and Emily walks up to Paige nearby. Paige admits she left earlier because she can’t stand to be in the same room as Ali. Emily tells Paige she’s brave and shouldn’t forget it. Paige just gives these pouty puppy dog eyes and I really feel sad for her. Feel better Paige! You’re way better than Alison now.
Mari: Only one of you faked your own death and it isn’t you Paige!
J: Though she did sorta try to drown Emily… but in Rosewood everyone’s got a least one death-faking, girl-blinding, car-throwing or attempted-drowning in their past, so that definitely doesn’t seem to be held against you that much at all.
Jenna’s House. Aria doesn’t knock but just opens the door and goes walking into someone else’s house. (M: Not the best way to start making amends, girl.) She calls out to Jenna once, then finds her in her room, crying. Blind Jenna looks up and asks if someone’s there, but Aria just backs away and leaves. Jenna sobs some more.
Fields House. Emily has brought Paige and Alison together in an attempt to clear the air. Alison says she’s sorry for the way she acted. Paige struggles to hold back tears while she says that she hated Alison and was happy that she was gone. Ali gets teary-eyed too and says she’s sorry. They’re both crying now, and Emily looks awkward like maybe she regrets this plan.
Mari: Something tells me Paige is beyond an, “I’m sorry.”
J: Marin Manor. Hanna is surprised Spencer trusts her to give her the homework assignments, but Spencer says she’s the first person she thought of when she learned her mom was leaving her dad. Aw. (M: Not Aria… whose mom left her dad…)(J: Oh yeah….) Spencer believes her dad was just trying to protect her by killing Mrs. DiLaurentis. Hanna’s mom knocks and says that Travis is downstairs. Ashley asks if everything is ok at home and Spencer makes up something about plumbing problems. When she leaves, Hanna says it would have been ok to tell her about her parents splitting, and Spencer’s not even sure why she lied. She’s having all these my-parents-are-separating feels and Hanna hugs her and it’s super sweet and sad at the same time.
Fields House of Feelings. Paige isn’t there anymore, and Alison asks if Emily wants to order food, but Emily says that she has a school thing she’s going to. When Alison asks to tag along, Emily awkwards that she asked Paige. Ali seems upset, but says she gets it, and asks if she can stay in Emily’s room while she’s gone, since her dad is working late and she doesn’t want to be in an empty house all alone. Emily says it’s fine.
Before she leaves, Ali says she owes Emily an apology as well. She always made Emily think her feelings for Ali were one-sided, when they weren’t. “Those kisses weren’t just for practice.” Emily doesn’t know what to say, and leaves looking shocked and confused. I just have to say it’s a bit suspect, coming after Emily revealing how important Paige is to her by bringing her to Ali. I’ve got at least one foot stretched out on the Heartless Cow ottoman.
Mari: Yep. Actually, right after this moment I flew over to the ottoman because I can’t handle how emotionally manipulative she is.
J: Rosewood’s One Coffee Shop. Hanna is ordering coffee for herself and Travis. Some people move in line behind her to reveal Caleb! with new hair on his head and his face. (M: I don’t like it.)(J: Me neither! Seriously, what is up with everyone’s hair??) They exchange subdued hello’s, and Caleb maintains his bad boy status by almost getting into a fight with a guy in a letterman’s jacket nearby, which Hanna steers him out of. She wonders how long he’s been back and why he hasn’t called, when her coffee comes up, and Caleb sees she has one for herself and the other is labeled Travis, and doesn’t answer. When she turns around from picking them up, he’s gone. Not like, gone to another table or to another counter, but just like, GONE.
Lucas’ Party of I Totally Have a Girlfriend, She Was Just Here A Second Ago I Swear. Hanna’s drinking away her pain with blue punch and leaving Caleb yet another message. She drops her phone and doesn’t see a text from Ali asking what she’s up to. Lucas shows up to chat. His girlfriend is conveniently nowhere to be seen, though Hanna teases him about “doing it” with her. Travis comes up and tells her that she’s had enough. In true drunk person fashion, she’s alternately flirty and grumpy with him. He drags her off.
Frozen Glee Club party. Emily is grabbing popcorn when Paige runs up with some gossip— Shana’s dead, and she thinks that she and Jenna were dating. Emily pretends she doesn’t know, and Sydney stands there all, “Who are these people?” It’s fabulous. #WeAreAllSydney. Emily explains her awkwardness with Jenna is that Ali and Jenna hated each other, so Emily and the other Liars had to by default. Then it’s time to let it go, and go sing “Let It Go,” so they walk into the auditorium.
Fields House. Alison leaves and starts to walk down the street. A car turns on its headlights and starts following her, and she picks up her pace.
Montgomery Manse. Aria walks in, turns on a lamp, puts her things down, and the camera pans back to show Jenna standing like a creep in the doorway. She wants to know what Aria was doing in her house earlier. Aria offers tea but Jenna just wants answers. Aria stammers that she heard about Shana’s death and just wanted to make sure Jenna was ok, and throws in an apology about having a part in blinding her because hey, why not? Aria says she knows what it’s like to lose someone, because of those years they thought Ali was dead. Jenna counters that at least Aria had her friends, and she has no one. Aria offers tea again and a chance to talk about Shana. Jenna agrees and walks inside.
Ali’s still being stalked by the mystery car. A shadow is thrown up on a building behind her, and she runs into the nearest building, which is the church. As we all know from watching Season 1, this probably won’t end well. She sends an SOS text to the other four Liars telling them where she is. (M: “The church,” because while Rosewood has multiple murderers, it only has one church. #godless) Then she hears a noise and decides to go investigate because she’s got time to kill, I guess. But it’s just the wind guys, blowing the shutters! She closes it and turns around to see Mona standing right behind her.
Ali claims not to be scared, but Mona replies, “You’re not as good a liar as you used to be.” She says she can prove all of them were in New York the night Shana was murdered. Mona wants Alison out of town, and says she’s not fooled into thinking Ali has changed. Ali throws back that Mona has become the bully, and how she almost killed Hanna (remember? when she threw the car at her?). Mona replies, “No one feels worst about that than I do” and claims to be better now.
Alison says she’s staying in town, and everyone wants to be her friend, which is what Mona is afraid of. Ali says she can easily take over Mona’s “army of losers” and even turn Mona into a loser again if she feels like it. Mona slaps her IN THE FACE. and Alison does the same, but her slap draws blood. She demands that Mona leave her alone, and walks out. Mona’s murder expression makes me think that’s probably not going to happen.
Marin Manor. A disapproving Ashley puts a drunk, sleepy Hanna to bed. She’s not sure why Hanna is acting out, and promises to hash it out with her when she sobers up in the morning. “Why would you do this to yourself?” she asks, cuddling up on the bed next to her daughter. “Caleb’s back,” Hanna replies, then drifts off to sleep.
DiLaurentis Domicile. Emily is staying over to keep Ali company. Ali wonders if Emily remembers what she told her when she pulled her out of that barn. An incident I don’t really remember… I think it was in season 1 or 2. (M: Maybe even 3 or 4. Who knows? Not me.) Emily says that she remembers Ali saying that she missed Emily the most. “You were the hardest one to leave behind,” Ali says.
Ezra’s Pedopad. Nooo, we’d made it through almost an entire episode without coming here! Aria walks in with pie, saying that even though A is dead (ha!) he should still lock his door. “Why pie?” he asks and that just makes me want to punch him more because 1) seriously, why is this happening and 2) Ezra you don’t look a gift pie in the mouth! Aria goes into the Shana/Jenna thing and Ezra takes this chance to wipe non-visible pie crumbs off her lips, then touches it to his lips? IDK, maybe he just liked her lip gloss. Aria pauses, then moves on, saying she thinks Jenna loved Shana all along and wasn’t just manipulating her like Ali said.
Ezra lifts his shirt to show his surgery scar to make a point about how Shana was evil by wounding him. He keeps talking but Aria’s all distracted by abs and they start making out, which looks like it’s probably leading to sexytimes and just, ugh.
Mari: His gunshot wound turns her on, I guess. That’s cool.
J: DiLaurentis Domicile. Emily and Alison are sharing a bed. Emily asks if Ali’s awake and they roll over to face each other. Emily leans over to kiss Alison and she kisses back. This is intercut with shots of Aria and Ezra having sex in his bed, which I feels undercuts the momentousness of this new Ali-and-Emily thing that’s taking some interesting turns.
Hey look, High School! Hanna is dealing with her hangover TV style, which means sunglasses and a black beanie for some reason, and complaining about how loud everyone is talking. (M: Has anyone in real life ever dealt with a hangover with a beanie? Please let me know.) The Liars and Ali wonder how Mona could have known about New York, or sent the “New York minute” text to Ali’s phone the very moment she got back to town. Spencer counters with the fact that she used the internet to make her own satellite last night, and while her point is that anyone can learn anything on the internet, I just love the idea of Spencer Hastings creating some satellite to do her bidding. Maybe if she did more of that, she’d have a leg up on the whole A thing. The term “blue-snarfed” comes in and I can’t quite get what that means, but it sounds bad.
Mari: Honestly it sounds like Smurf vomit to me.
J: They walk around the corner to be confronted by Mona, Lucas, the girls who Ali hugged in the beginning and a handful of other people. Spencer says they’re not afraid, but Mona wonders what lies Ali has told them. Turns out, Mona taped Ali’s take-over-your-army-of-losers speech in the church. At the slap all the Liars jump simultaneously and it’s kind of hilarious. Alison starts to talk, then her eyes narrow and she walks away. I thought she was going to confront Mona again, but she went into a nearby bathroom instead. The Liars bust in and ask her to explain. Ali says that they can’t trust Mona because she manipulates them, but Emily points out that Ali once again lied to them. They all walk out and Ali looks devastated.
Spencer and Toby are sitting in his car. They talk briefly about A then move in for some adorable cuddle time. which turns into make-out time.
Playground and also it’s nighttime now. Caleb is sitting on a swing in the dark when Hanna walks up. She asks why he never called back and he says it’s because he didn’t want to mess up what she had with Travis. She asks why he came back but he doesn’t answer, instead commenting on her hair. They sit in silence.
Mari: The answer is because his other show got cancelled, right? I can see why that would be uncomfortable, bro.
J: I blame the hair.
Fields House. Emily is pretending to watch a movie, ignoring Alison, who says she knows she messed up. Finally Emily asks why she lied, and Ali says it’s because she was afraid of losing Emily. She runs her hand along Emily’s cheek and leans in for a kiss but Emily gets up and walks away angrily. The movie she was watching suddenly switches into breaking local news, with police getting ready for an announcement about the unknown girl buried in Ali’s grave.
Hanna on the swing gets a text message and drags Caleb along with her. They get to the Fields’ house (or maybe it’s DiLaurentis house?) and everyone is already there. Caleb and Alison share a look but don’t say anything. The police announcement is unfolding. Emily holds Ali’s hand, prompting side eye from Hanna and a whisper to Spencer asking if they’re together. Spencer accuses her of drinking again. Rude.
As the police chief leads up to the reveal of the dead victim, Hanna grabs Caleb’s hand and Aria holds Ezra’s hand, so I’m just going to assume that Spencer is holding Toby’s hand too. I’m not holding anyone’s hand, FYI. The dead girl is Bethany Young, a 17-year-old patient from Radley hospital who they all thought just ran away. Great job, LOLPD.
The announcement’s over, but before anyone can say anything, an explosion blows out all the windows. Everyone falls to the ground, then runs outside. It looks like… all.. of their cars exploded? It’s hard to tell exactly, but there’s a lot of rubble around and a nearby house is on fire, which turns out to be Toby’s. As Caleb asks if anyone else is inside, Toby sprints towards the flames. Meanwhile, everyone’s phone rings at the same time. They all look at each other, and no one looks at their phone.
Cut to an unknown apartment room. Black gloves turn off a phone, as movers say that’s the last box and leave. A black-hooded person sits down next to a radio tuned to the police frequency, with chatter coming in about the explosion. NotDead!A turns to a box of dolls, pulls a blond one out and sets it next to a shrink-wrapped doll house. Just as the camera pans toward the face, we hit the end of the episode and the screen goes black.
Well we’ve got the return of some old characters, Jenna and Caleb, plus some interesting reveals, like the Sydney/Jenna friendship and the Alison/Emily relationship, and THANK GOD we don’t have to pretend that A isn’t around anymore. Also, A is definitely upping his/her game because, giant explosions, damn.
Next time on Pretty Little Liars: Toby’s house keeps exploding in S05 E06 – Run, Ali, Run.
I'm a chronic book nerd and love storytelling in all forms. I'm particularly excited by the rise of the television show as an art form with long, cinematically beautiful plots and complex character arcs (I also watch cartoons). My travels in the past handful of years have led me through three continents and most recently landed me among the majestic mountains of Colorado. Some day I will compile all my travel journals/blogs into one place. Some day. Until then, you can find me with craft beer in hand, ready at any moment to deeply and passionately discuss survival tactics for the zombie apocalypse.
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
