Previously: The Princess Shireen of House Baratheon was burned at the stake.
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Mother’s Mercy
Marines: I’m so scared.
Democracy Diva: Me too.
Mari: Camp Liar, Liar, Heir on Fire. Icicles are melting and Melisandre looks super pleased with herself. She goes into Stannis’s tent to continue being pleased with herself and the Lord of Light. She says that Stannis will for sure capture Winterfell because the Lord of Light has shown her Bolton banners burning. Melisandre is trying to be affectionate with Stannis but I guess he’s a little bit bummed about setting his daughter on fire, or something. He leaves her, bumping her in the face as he goes.
Outside in the camp, a soldier comes up to hit him with the bad news that about half of the soldiers have deserted. Melisandre looks less pleased about that so BOOYAH.
Diva: I have never seen Melisandre look like a lost little girl before, but that’s all she looks like right now. You can almost forget she convinced a dude to murder his innocent daughter to melt some fucking snow. Except, NO YOU CAN’T, THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE TO FORGET. A different advisor might have realized that there would be real human consequences to princess-burning blood magic, but Melisandre is blinded by the (Lord of) Light.
Mari: Another soldier comes and he’s got bad-news-face too. Stannis tells him to out with it because it can’t be worse than mutiny. We cut to some soldier leading him a little ways into the woods. Selyse is hanging from a tree.
I cared very little for Selyse, dating back to the days of fetuses in jars, but I wasn’t expecting to see her hanged.
Diva: The most horrific thing about this show is that I’m actually finding myself looking back fondly on the days of fetuses in jars. WHAT HAS THIS SHOW DONE TO ME?
Mari: I’m not entirely sure, but it involves lots of rape and murder and weird blood magic.
As two soldiers are cutting Selyse’s body down, another soldier comes with more bad news: Melisandre was just seen riding out of camp. Stannis tells Bad News Soldier #3 to get the men into marching formation. They are going to Winterfell anyway.
The Wall. Jon is telling Sam the story of the big-ass Other army. Sam asks what Jon’s going to do. Jon says he’s going to hope the Others don’t learn how to climb the Wall. Kind of fair but also you probably need a better plan. Sam asks about the dragonglass, but that’s lost forever. And anyway, they would need a mountain of it. The only way he was able to kill Professional White Walker was with his Valyrian steel sword.
Jon Snow is having a bit of a pity party because he’s the first Lord Commander in history to sacrifice Night’s Watchmen lives to save Wildlings. The boys toast to being hated. Sam uses this super opportune moment to be all, “hey, so, can you send me away so I can become a maester?” Jon is like WTF, because if Sam is gone, who will be left to give him advice he can trust? Sam suggests Edd, which is just funny to me because Edd is the wall-mate we forget most often.
Diva: I laughed at this too, because of my previous reminder that Edd is that character on the Wall no one remembers unless, like me, they are obsessed with his character in the books. He doesn’t do much more than dole out some extremely dark and hilarious one-liners, but for me, that’s enough.
Mari: Anyway, Sam says he’ll be more helpful to everyone as a maester, especially now that Maester Aemon is gone. Sam goes on about how Gilly, Sam Jr and he will surely die if they stay.
Jon sighs and gives a sad little head nod. He does remind him that the citadel will make him swear off women too. Sam says they’ll bloody try and Jon guesses those are the words of a man who has gotten some. Jon asks how he managed after being almost beaten to death and Sam smiles that they did it very carefully.
Diva: I don’t have high hopes for a reunion, because when have two characters we like ever been able to reunite after a dramatic goodbye? Except for Jon and Ghost, pretty much no one. But at least our boys got to have one last sex talk.
Mari: Look, at you, looking on the bright side.
We cut to Sam’s departure, complete with sad little wave to say goodbye to Jon.
To the south, stupid hateful awful Stannis Baratheon is marching with his sorry-looking bunch of men. Winterfell is in sight.
Inside the castle, Sansa uses a corkscrew to break out of her locked room. I’m so scared for her.
Just outside the castle, Podrick has been hunting and collecting firewood. He hears men yelling and drops everything to run back to Brienne. He tells her that Stannis’s army is approaching, marked by the flaming heart banners they carried at the Battle of the Blackwater. Brienne gives a look out to the tower she told Sansa to light a candle in if she wanted out. We see Sansa has just arrived with her candle. She makes her way in. Brienne looks torn, desperate, and turns away from the tower, no light in sight.
I don’t know how often I’m going to stop to tell you that I’m having feelings, but just consider it a given. Feelings, feelings, feelings, especially as one second later, the candle is lit.
Diva: I’m having too many feelings to handle, so I’ll just laugh at the fact that Sansa has a super-bright LED-lit candle that can apparently be seen in daylight with snow all around from really far away. I’m going to laugh at a lot of small, unimportant details this episode, because otherwise I’m going to be crying in the shower for the next four hours.
Mari: Good strategy is good. LOL LED candle!
Stannis is giving orders for digging trenches. He wants a foraging party sent out before the siege at sunrise. One of his men tells him there won’t be a siege. Stannis looks toward the castle and sees Bolton’s mounted army riding straight for them. The two armies clash and Sansa watches this from the Tower of LED Candles of Hopes and Prayers.
Diva: My favorite detail of the faraway shots of the armies meeting: you can see the soldiers in the rear of Stannis’s army breaking and running away before they get anywhere near a Bolton soldier. Can’t say I blame them.
Mari: Cut to the end of the slaughter. We see a bunch of Stannis’s men, dead. Stannis himself is alive, but hurt. Two Bolton soldiers find him. Stannis kills them both, but not before one of them slices the back of his knee. He’s down, his leg bleeding into the snow profusely. We hear footsteps and before we see who is approaching, we hear Stannis ask if Bolton has women fighting for him now.
It’s Brienne. She introduces herself, explaining that she was Kingsguard to Renly and she was there when he was murdered by a shadow with Stannis’s face. Stannis has an appropriate, “oh shit.” reaction. He confesses to having murdered Renly with blood magic. Brienne pulls out her sword and sentences him to die. She asks for any last words and Stannis is looking around, kind of lost and confused. You can almost imagine him asking himself how he ended up here. How this happened to him. (D: We’ll actually see this expression on a lot of characters this episode, and it gets me deep in the feels every time.) He tells Brienne, “go on. Do your duty.” We get a POV shot of Stannis looking up at Brienne as her sword comes down.
Diva: ALL HAIL GENDRY, FIRST OF HIS NAME, KING OF THE ANDALS AND THE RHOYNAR AND THE FIRST MEN! I’m down.
Mari: So down.
We get a gruesome look at a bunch of fallen soldiers. Ramsay says it’s time to head back, but a stupid soldier starts making noises and trying to crawl away. He hears Ramsay walk toward him and surrenders. Ramsay accepts his surrender and kills him anyway. Ramsay tells the man with him that they should head back. “My wife must be lonely.”
The camera pulls back and we see a bigger scope of the slaughter.
Sansa walks back to her room and while trying to avoid one of Ramsay’s men, walks straight into Myranda holding a bow and arrow. Theon is with her. Sansa says she knows what Ramsay is and if she is going to die, she wants to die with some piece of herself left. Myranda smiles and asks who said anything about dying? Sansa’s father was Warden of the North, so Ramsay needs Sansa. Or at least he needs some parts of her, in order to produce an heir or two. Then, he’s going to have fun with those same parts of her. Myranda nocks the bow again and asks if she should get started with the fun now.
Diva: I was completely prepared for this death (and not just because Myranda is a character whose motivations have never made an ounce of sense, so I definitely will not miss her), and still gasped when she hit the ground. That sound. My god.
Mari: As the two of them look at the dead body, the Bolton army is returning. Theon grabs Sansa’s arm and they start running. Theon leads her to a particular parapet, looks over at a snow bank and gives Sansa a look. They hold hands and after a breath, jump.
We cut to Ser Meryn. Every time we see him, the show seems to be going, “DID WE TELL YOU HOW AWFUL HE IS?” You did, show. You did. That isn’t going to stop them from this next scene, though. Meryn stands before three adolescent girls and he’s got a switch in his hands. They are all whimpering and terrified. He whips the first girl across the back and she cries out. He whips the second girl and she cries out as well. He whips the third girl and she does not make a sound. He crosses in front of her and hits her again, but she does not make a sound. He breaks the switch across her head and she does not make a sound. He says that he’s got his work cut out for him and sends the other two girls out of the room. They run in terror.
The third girl pulls her hair out of her face and looks defiantly up at Meryn. He punches her in the gut AND WHAT KIND OF HUMAN BEING IS THIS? I feel sick. (D: I don’t think I actually breathed during this entire scene.) From her position on the floor, the girl gathers herself and Meryn watches her. She raises her hand to her face and in a quick series of movements, pulls off her blond wig to reveal ARYA GONNA KILL YOU SO HARD STARK. I figured it was coming but it was still an effective reveal. Arya leaps up onto Meryn like a NINJA and stabs him with a baby knife in the eye. When he’s on the ground, she stabs his other eye. Meryn is screaming like, well you know, like someone’s just stabbed his eyes, so Arya gags him. Then she stabs him multiple times in the chest.
Arya stands and tells Meryn that he was the first name on her list for killing Syrio Forel. She’s gotten some of the other names on her list and the Many Faced God has taken a couple others. We get a way too good look at Meryn’s bloody, eyeless face. He’s the one whimpering now. Arya asks if he knows who she is. He makes unintelligible noises. Arya grabs him by the hair and stabs him again in the gut. She stands and says that he knows who she is. She is Arya Stark. She pulls the gag out of his mouth and asks if he know who he is. She answers: You are nothing. You are no one. Arya slits open his neck.
This is the psycho-killer Arya that we’ve been building up to since Arya saw her father murdered. The show was real heavy-handed about making sure we knew Meryn was a real bad guy before Arya brutally murdered him, but this was STILL really hard to watch. Blerg.
Diva: This is basically word for word what’s in my notes, “blerg” included. Arya crosses a name off her list, a man who deserved all the worst things in the universe, but we take no pleasure in his death, because we’re seeing what it does to Arya. And it’s truly terrifying.
Mari: Arya heads back to the Hogwarts School of Assassins and puts back the face she used in order to get into Meryn’s room. She smiles at it fondly, but A-Man and Nameless Cunt are waiting for her. A-Man says that Arya has taken the wrong life. Nameless knew she was right about Arya. She wasn’t ready. Nameless grabs Arya’s arms and brings her forward to A-Man. He says that Arya stole from the Many Faced God and now a debt is owed. He brings out a bottle of poison, saying only a death can pay for life. Nameless grabs Arya’s face and she is freaking out, but A-Man takes the poison himself. He falls dead and Arya runs to his body and cries. Nameless asks why Arya is crying and she’s like, “HELLO? DEAD. He was my friend!” Nameless basically tells her that she hasn’t been paying attention. A-Man is standing again just behind her.
Arya asks who is dead on the floor if A-Man is alive. He says that person is no one, just like she should’ve been when she grabbed a face from the Face Wall. Arya grabs at No One’s face and there is another face underneath. She keeps pulling as A-Man says that Arya is still someone. To someones, the faces are like poison. Arya reaches the final face and it’s hers. As she looks down at her own face on the dead body, her vision blurs. Her eyes cloud over and she goes blind.
Dorne. On a little pier, Myrcella, Trystane, Jaime and Bronn get ready to leave. Myrcella kisses Prince Doran goodbye. Doran looks over at Ellaria and she steps forward after a little hesitation. She asks Myrcella to forgive her and gives her a kiss on the lips. It’s weird and also I immediately assume DRUGGED LIPSTICK.
Myrtle (D: I assume you mean Myrcella, but I refuse to correct your error because calling her Myrtle is giving me some much-needed giggles in this episode of horror) (M: So it shall remain. Thanks, auto-correct!) gets on the boat and Jaime gives everyone a nod.
Bronn says goodbye to one of the Sand Snakes, the one who was fond of flashing her breasts at him, and says maybe he’ll come visit her. She says maybe she’ll come visit him because something totally unnecessary with the word pussy in it. Okay, bye now Bronn. See you later Sand Snake.
Diva: Someone fire the writer of that pussy line. Please. My god. That was truly the most poorly-written line in this show’s history. It’s stupider than any of the myriad stupid things that have happened in Dorne this season.
Mari: I’m not even sad to leave it.
On the boat, Daddy Uncle Jaime gives Myrcella her lion necklace back and tells her not to lose it again. She promises to never take it off. He knows that she didn’t want to leave Dorne, the only place worth living in Westeros, but he’s glad she’s coming home. He’s also glad Trystane is coming with him, as he seems like a “nice boy.” Myrcella asks if he thinks Cersei will like Trystane and Jamie is like, “yeah sure,” but Myrcella doesn’t believe it. Jaime asks if she’s ever known Cersei to like anyone besides her own children. Myrcella says, “she likes you.” Awkward.
Jaime isn’t so sure of that anymore either. I guess that’s the cost of RAPING SOMEONE YOU IDIOT, NO I HAVEN’T FORGOTTEN. (D: A+) Things get EVEN MORE AWKWARD as Jaime tries to have a talk with Myrcella. Not any talk you and I have ever had, but I’m assuming it’s the “so I fell in love with my sister and I’m your uncle dad” talk. He starts by stuttering around some stuff about how you don’t choose who you love, it just ~*happens*~. No word on how you absolutely choose who you stick your penis in, but whatever.
Myrcella stands and cuts him off because she knows where this is going. She knows he’s her father and she’s actually glad he is. She gives him a hug and Jaime is shocked, but soon registers it enough to return the hug. She pulls away and we interrupt this one second of (albeit, weird incest-tinged) happiness to show Myrcella with a nosebleed because it was drugged lipstick.
Diva: I would like to state for the record that I do not understand the motivations of anyone in Dorne, ever. Basically none of the actions that took place in this episode – nay, in this season – have made sense. Even the non-Dornish characters that we’ve known since Season 1 make decisions that make no sense in the context of their personalities and histories. Tyrion would be falling on his ass laughing to see Jaime trying to earnestly talk about feelings with anyone, let alone his daughter-niece who is practically a stranger to him.
Mari: And now Trystane is on a boat with a bunch of people who are going to extra hate him if Myrcella dies. Great job, everyone.
We cut back to the pier where Ellaria and her daughters are watching the ship go. Ellaria has got a nosebleed too. Her daughter gives her a handkerchief and she wipes her nose and at the poison on her lips. She takes the antidote and walks away super satisfied with having just killed a child. (D: She and Melisandre have that in common.)
And on that note, I’m handing it over to Diva!
Diva: Meereen. We begin, of course, with the greatest boy band music video of all time, as the camera pans across Tyrion, Daario, and Jorah brooding on the steps beneath Dany’s vacant throne.
Mari: This is better than that one time I called Myrcella Myrtle.
Diva: I’m glad that’s our new barometer for amazingness.
Anyway, Tyrion tells both of Dany’s would-be suitors that they don’t have a chance in hell with their dragon queen, but he knows a little something about loving the wrong woman. Missandei enters, arm-in-arm with Grey Worm (YAY!), who is still bandaged and slow, but recovered enough to be all, “Jorah, didn’t the queen exile you? GTFO.” Daario explains that Dany would be dead without Jorah, and Missandei explains that she herself would be dead without Tyrion, the “little man,” as she calls him in Valyrian.
RANT TIME: Really? The Great Masters who hate Dany for freeing their slaves are going to listen to… a freed slave? I adore Grey Worm, and I’m all for giving him a bigger role on Dany’s Cabinet. But THIS MAKES NONE OF THE SENSEZ. If Meereen were going to listen to someone lowborn just because they could fight, Dany would have been free to marry Daario, whom she actually likes, or no one at all, rather than having to go after Lionel Richie Hizdahr. The whole point of that plotline was that Dany needed a highborn Meereneese former slaveowner to win the city to her side! And now we’re supposed to believe that this same city is going to listen to one of the Unsullied, who are famous for being eunuch slaves who only know how to obey? WHY?
Mari: Basically because not everyone could go on the dragon hunting field trip.
Diva: Ugh, the Great Contrivance Spirit makes me tired.
Daario convinces Grey Worm to stay, and Missandei with him, to rule the city with Tyrion while Daario and Jorah go off on a road trip buddy comedy that will definitely not be as fun as the Arya and the Hound comedy tour. (M: RIP Hound!)
Tyrion watches from Dany’s balcony – it’s another strange fish-out-of-water moment of the episode, to see him up there – as her suitors ride off to find her. And who appears but our old friend Varys, telling Tyrion he needs to learn all of his enemies’ secrets in order to rule. They do their cute, “if only I knew a spymaster!” “if only you had experience running a shithole of a city full of liars who hate you!” thing.
Somewhere north of Meereen, a dirt-covered Dany tells Drogon that they need to go home. Her white Tom Ford gown is now smoky gray but still chic in that singed-by-dragonfire kind of way.
Diva: Petting Drogon gently, she climbs on his back, begging to go home, but he’s not having that shit. He just wants to nap in a giant pile of burnt bones, like cool kids do. For reasons unknown to people who have brains, Dany leaves her dragon behind and goes on a solo walk through the hills. She hears hoofs, and turns to see a Dothraki rider – maybe a Khal, based on his long, bell-adorned braid. Three more riders appear – his bloodriders? – and then the rest of the khalasar follows. Dany takes off her ring and drops it to the ground – I guess as a clue for her suitors to find, even though I don’t think we’ve ever seen this ring before? – as the Dothraki ride up and circle menacingly around her.
Diva: Dany’s accessorizing is clearly a complex issue.
King’s Landing. A dark, dank prison cell opens, and it’s shocking to see Cersei curled up on the floor, filthy and broken. This time, when the Septa tells her to confess, she obeys. Next thing we know, she’s on her knees in front of the High Sparrow, begging for forgiveness. She wants to know if they’ll grant her freedom if she confesses, but he just promises to treat her in accordance with her sins. Ruh-roh. Cersei confesses to having sex outside of marriage, with Lancel. When the High Sparrow gets judgy, we see a spark of Cersei’s old pride as she rages about King Robert and his whores.
Cut to a naked Cersei, the septas scrubbing her body roughly. They sit her down and cut her hair, her famous blonde Lannister locks, as Cersei silently cries. When it’s over, she’s left naked and alone, covered in shorn hair.
Mari: And bleeding, right? I couldn’t tell if they cut her while cutting or if those were old injuries.
Diva: I’m not sure, but yeah, on this show, it’s a pretty safe bet she was bleeding.
The septas lead Cersei out, in a rough shift and her shorn hair. They stand her on the steps of Baelor’s Sept, before a huge crowd. The Sparrow announces who she is and why she is here. As he drones on about Cersei presenting herself before gods and men without artifice, she’s barely listening. Her eyes are on the Red Keep, high on its hill, the roads between the Sept and the Keep clogged with thousands of people waiting to see their queen brought low. The septas tear off her dress and nudge her down the stars. Completely nude, Cersei reluctantly starts down the steps into the crowd, as the meanest septa chants, “SHAME, SHAME, SHAME,” and rings a bell, giving everyone their favorite reaction gif of 2015.
Cersei’s pride is not yet deflated. Her spine is straight, her head is held high, and the crowd is silent as she approaches, making room for her to pass.
This scene was excruciatingly long, but I respected the hell out of this show for following Cersei’s walk for as long as it did. When this season started with the flashback to Cersei hearing her prophecy, I knew Cersei’s walk would be in the finale. For once, I’m glad they didn’t shy away from how ugly and brutal this was. Showing us a minute of the walk wouldn’t have really delved into her pain. Taking us with her on that walk made us see the story through Cersei’s eyes, and I think that was a very important choice. And while we all have gotten some measure of pleasure from seeing this evil queen brought low, I’m happy to fight anyone who calls this punishment just or fair or deserved. Remember, this is not her punishment for murder, incest, treason, and all the other horrible things Cersei has done. This is her punishment for having sex outside the bonds of marriage, after her husband cheated on her countless times. Robert never had to face the wrath of the gods (or their servants) or the commoners for his affairs; neither would any other man. This is a punishment exclusively for women, and it’s horrific, and it brings a whole new (old?) meaning to a walk of shame. (Shame. Shame. *ding*)
Mari: When this show does things like this correctly, it’s what makes it brutal and gripping and hard to look away from. Here is Cersei who we love to hate, who has done terrible, horrible things, getting punished for the wrong thing. And we watch her look up to the Red Keep with so much hope and determination and I can’t even. Here is Cersei who, even though I don’t root for her, has always struggled against what it means to be a woman in this world. Too many emotions. Glad it’s over.
Diva: It’s so bizarre, the moment Cersei enters the Red Keep, surrounded by her guards in shiny and bright armor, and Grand Maester Pycelle looking the same as always, while Cersei stands before them covered in blood and shit and god knows what else. She’s home, but the visual is clear: she doesn’t belong there. Qyburn runs over and wraps her in a Lannister crimson cloak, and she weeps in his arms. He introduces Cersei to the newest member of the Kingsguard – a man so obscenely huge, Cersei is at eye level with his stomach. His face is hidden, but there’s really only one man in Westeros who’s ever been so huge that he could squish Oberyn Martell’s face with his hands. You can just barely see his eyes, and the skin around them looks gray and blue and dead. The mystery knight picks up Cersei like she’s a little kitten, as Qyburn explains that the knight has sworn that he will not speak until all of Cersei’s enemies are dead. Cersei’s eyes are still watery, but when she hears that, they seem to burn with a bit of that old Cersei spark.
The Wall. I’m going to need to take a big swig of my bourbon-spiked coffee before this starts. *gulp* Okay. Our darling Onion Knight has arrived at the Wall to beg Jon for assistance. Davos reminds him that Jon saved the Wildlings’ lives, and now they need to fight for the realm. Jon says it’s not their fight, but he is interrupted by the arrival of Melisandre. She looks as defeated and devastated as Stannis did when he lost everything, and as Cersei did when that woman spit in her face. Jon asks her about Stannis, but Davos’s first question is about his princess Shireen. Melisandre just stares at him, finally at least looking a little bit horrified at what she’s done, and walks away. Davos knows what that looks means, and his furrowed brow breaks my heart all over again.
Diva: I legit have tears in my eyes just from that gif, so, yeah, #FEELSFEST.
Back in his chambers, Jon reads over some letters and broods like only he can. Ollie rushes in to tell him that one of the wildlings knows where Jon’s uncle Benjen is, explaining why Benjen was in the previouslies when he hasn’t been seen since, like, S1 E2 or something. Jon hurries out with Ollie, and Ser Alliser Thorne is outside, telling Jon that the wildling saw Benjen alive just a few weeks ago. Alliser ushers him over to a group of a dozen or so men, and a stake that says TRAITOR. Jon stares at it, and seems to know what it means.
The first knife in Jon Snow’s stomach comes from Ser Alliser, of course. “For the Watch,” he tells Jon. Five or so more men stab Jon next, all saying the same thing. Ollie comes forward, crying silently, and Jon barely manages to whisper his name. Ollie stabs him, for the Watch, and the men back away, with Ollie still crying.
We see Jon, dead in the snow, his blood pooling out beneath him.
What a season. I think we all found it excruciating to watch, though taking our time recapping it was definitely the right decision for my ability to still enjoy this show at some point in the future. (M: Cosign. It’s been so long and this all still made me cry.) And aside from the constant gut-punches that made me dread each coming episode, the show fucked up every inch of the Dorne storyline (seriously, LITERALLY NONE OF THAT HAPPENS AND DORNE IN THE BOOKS IS SO GOOD YOU GUYS) and that will always bother me, because I am defiantly #TeamDorne.
Mari: I think the show kind of lost it’s way a little bit, especially at the beginning of this season. I think they got to carried away with being the shockiest, most naked TV show ever. They forgot they were also telling a story and lost a balance between highs and lows and gave us only lows. I wouldn’t have been able to watch this straight through because there was so little balance. But, we made it. We made it and for all that, something must be said about the way these characters and this show manages to pull your heart out at every turn. The reason it sucks so bad sometimes, what they do, is because I care about this story and so many of these characters.
Diva: Agreed.
I won’t bother you with predictions about the fate of Jon Snow – I think the posters and teases for next season prove we haven’t seen the last of those luscious locks – or any of the other characters we left dead or facing impending doom (which was basically everyone). I think I’m finally getting excited for the next season, though I’m dreading the show taking on future, unpublished book storylines and watering them down like they did with Dorne. Thank you for dealing with us and our months-long breaks between recaps. You guys are the best. (M: Best of the best of the best.)
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
I'm a J.D. by day/blogger by night who directs her snark and judgment primarily towards celebrities and their many red carpet mishaps. Blogging from the style capital of the world (just kidding - I live in DC), I rant and rave over the best and worst in fashion and pop culture.
