Previously: Hardin stayed out all night and got into a fight and made Tessa feel like shit.
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Samantha: FYI, dear readers, this chapter has a content warning from us to you for A Story About Rape.
Tessa’s reading on the couch when she decides it’s time for bed. She has held strong and not gone to bed with him but that goes up in smoke when she realizes he’s having a nightmare. She wakes him up and soothes the itty baby and holds him. He’s all sweaty and clammy, and he begs her to stay so she does.
Marines: If you bet on this argument being ended by trauma, you win nothing but the knowledge that Anna Todd is richer than all of us.
Samantha: We cut to her in the shower the next morning. She’s hoping that he’s still asleep when she gets out but he must have sensed that and made sure to be awake. He’s all normal and calm, but she gives him the cold shoulder. He thought that all was well since she came to bed, but she tells him that it’s not. She wants answers about the secrets, fights, and nightmares or she is done with him. Definitely super for real this time.
He tells her that she won’t understand, and she tells him that she gave up a lot to be with him. She mentions her relationship with her mother, but I also want to throw in her mental health and independence. (M: RIP) He gets all mad that she’s threatening to leave and demands that she tell him that she won’t. She leaves for work.
She wonders why he thinks that she would judge him when she didn’t even judge him for breaking his poor stepmother’s dishes.
“…I can’t ignore the feeling that I am missing something very obvious here.”
God, me too Tessa, and it’s terrifying. #WhatDidHardinDo
Mari: I like that she thinks she can forgive Hardin for anything because of some broken dishes. It’s gonna be a little more difficult if he reveals that he’s a serial murderer, Theresa.
Samantha: She feels better at work and Hardin sends her some “I’m sorry please come home” texts. Kimberly is happy that she stood up to him but thinks she should text him back now. So Tessa tells him that she will be coming home after work. Riveting. She gets out a little early and gets her hair trimmed and a manicure, cause the wedding AKA Probably the Climax of the Book, is tomorrow.
She gets home and Hardin is pacing around and she says that he’s “unrecognizable” because because his hair is down and he’s wearing sweats. Is this like the magic glasses effect? (M: She only recognizes him in t-shirts and anger.) He made her dinner and she’s all shocked. They agree that he’s an asshole. He’s acting all pitiful and scared which is garbage and I don’t care. She reminds him that she needs answers and he says that he’s going to give them to her!
He prefaces the story with how no one but his mom and dad know this story. When he was 7 his dad was wasted at his usual bar and he picked a fight with some soldiers and smashed a beer bottle over one’s head.
Ooooh, this is going to be our version of the Crack Whore?
Mari: Dad or Mom issues to explain away the garbage and abusive behavior of the main character? Uh-huh, yes.
Samantha: His dad then left the bar and the soldiers went across the street to his house for payback. Except that his dad didn’t go home, they just thought he did, and they found Hardin’s mom asleep on the couch.
Oh come onnnnnnnnnn. It just had to be this. It had to be a “rape the woman for the heroes pain” plot point, huh? JFC. Does Hardin’s mom even have a damn name?
So Hardin hears her screaming and comes downstairs. Her nightgown is ripped open. Bet it was white too. He couldn’t leave her even though she was telling him to go. He tried to fight them off but couldn’t and then put band-aids all over her body to try and fix her.
Tessa is crying and can’t believe his nightmares are from this absurdly terrible garbage trope. He tells her that it felt good to talk about it and that after that he would only sleep on the couch so that if someone broke in they would get him first. He went to some therapists but nothing helped him until Tessa.
UGH. First of all, therapy is a good and worthwhile and helpful endeavor. Secondly, ladies, you cannot fix men! You are not the cure.
He tells her he’s sorry he was out all night because he doesn’t want to be his dad. Tessa shifts her anger from Hardin to his shitty dad. Hardin begs her not to leave him, and she promises.
Damn. That was our crack whore storytime but it wasn’t whatever thing he does that’s hideous and relationship ending.
Mari: Sam hit all the low points: using a rape to feed Hardin’s pain and using that to make Tessa think she can’t leave him. We are supposed to be okay with Hardin’s behavior because he’s had trauma in his past and especially because “nothing has helped.” He’s tried, you see, and our main character is now forced into the position of being the only thing that… what? What exactly because he’s still mean, abusive, violent, and irresponsible. What is Tessa’s presence exactly curing him of?
Whatever. I’m off to see if I have any friends or acquaintances who rated this highly on Goodreads.
Samantha: I literally unfriended someone who did.
Next time on After: Mom-alert in Chapter 91.
I'm a 28 year old graduated English major and almost librarian. I can often be found singing too loudly (poorly) in the car or spending some time (hours) on Tumblr. I am a lover of Harry Potter, the Spice Girls, and too many other things.
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
