Previously: Magic flashbacks in the old aunt house.
Content Warnings: Blood, violence.
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Episode 8
Marines: Season 2 started airing January 8th on AMC in the U.S. So, uh, I guess it’s time to wrap up season one, huh?
We start the episode watching again as Diana, trying to sense her way to Matthew, walks straight toward Juliette. Matthew realizes something is wrong and super runs to Diana. Juliette turns Diana, so that she’s between Juliette and Matthew. (T: And sniffs her. Stop it.) (R: So all vampires are creepy, not just Matthew) Matthew growls and asks if Gerbert Baby is around, too. Juliette tearfully says that she’s left him. She cries that Matthew abandoned her. Diana is glaring. She was just trying to take a magic romp in the woods.
Matthew is inching closer to them and threatens Juliette if she hurts Diana. Juliette says she has to see how Diana managed to pull Matthew and demands that they kiss, or else she’ll stab Diana in the neck with her pointy nails. Matthew tells Diana it’s going to be alright, and then kisses her. Juliette watches for a second before thinking that’s enough of that, and pulls Diana back away. She cries some more about how she was sired and created by Gerbert Baby to be the object of Matthew’s desire. And now she has no value. Matthew says he’s sorry, which was apparently the wrong thing to say.
Rebecca: Imagine this is how you meet your new man’s ex? Y’all are just hiking in the woods together and then suddenly some lady is threatening to cut your throat and demand you make out in front of her.
Juliette flings Diana to the side and then attacks Matthew. She takes a CHUNK out of his neck and then a CHUNK out of his chest. He collapses and bleeds a lot. Diana pushes Juliette out of the way and gets to Matthew. Juliette yells that her magic can’t save Matthew. Diana looks back at Juliette, her eyes black and full of fire. Magical Indoor Wind starts up, and Juliette looks SCARED. Diana’s arm burst into flames and then she pulls them back, and a fire bow appears in her hands. She releases the fire arrow and it slams Juliette through the barn and kills her. Juliette didn’t really deserve to die. Her story was tragic. However. THAT WAS NEAT LOOKING. WOW.
Rebecca: That was some video game shit, and I am hyped. Except, yes, why is it we’re getting badass women fighting over Matthew let them fight over something worthwhile.
Mari: Yes, for sure. He does not deserve.
Diana goes back to Matthew. He gives his final, gaspy goodbye, but Diana isn’t ready to let him go. She stands and prays to the Goddess to save him. the Goddess responds and says there will be a price. Diana repeats a lot of times that she will give anything. A knife appears in her hands.
Rebecca: I definitely just yelled “Let him die” at my TV.
Sarah is getting the mail when she sees Miriam crying out for Matthew and super running into the woods. Sarah yells for Emily and runs after Miriam.
Everyone arrives at the barn– Miriam, Marcus, Sarah and Emily. I’m not sure how Sarah and Emily caught up to the vampires, but okay. Marcus tries to help Matthew, but Diana yells at him to get away and puts up a magic bubble around herself and Matthew. Diana cuts her wrist and feeds the blood to Matthew, but it isn’t enough to close up both wounds. Sarah is yelling for Diana to stop, but instead, she offers her neck to Matthew. He takes a bite and it gives him some flashbacks of all the times he’s sniffed or wanted to bite Diana, I guess. Their “love story.” (T: EW, David!) It reminds us that Matthew once said he wouldn’t be able to stop if he ever started feeding on her. But the last thing we see is them exchanging I love yous. In the barn, Matthew makes himself stop feeding on Diana. She looks real rough after being a healing snack. though.
We cut to inside the house, where Matthew still has some open wounds, but is walking around all fine. Diana, on the other hand, is in the bed, conscious but weak. (T: So much has happened and the opening credits are still running!) Marcus rushes in as he went on a mission to steal some blood for a transfer. He sets Diana up to receive the blood.
I’m really unsure what the Goddess did in this situation. I’m sure the price to pay will come back, but like, what did she do?
Rebecca: She, uh, gave Diana a knife. Vampires can’t feed without it, you see. Thanks, Goddess!
Mari: -_-
Domenico visits Gerbert Baby and reports that he’s got no news of Juliette. And all he knows of Matthew is that he’s not at Sept-Tours. Domenico stands there smirking for a bit until Gerbert is like WHAT? Domenico says he’s got some other news, risky news, that would probably require a reward. Gerbert calls him a greedy little shit and demands the news anyway.
Later, Gerbert descends into a cellar/dungeon sort of place, remarking as he does how much loves the smell of frightened witch. Jesus, Gerbert, just buy a Bath and Body Works candle like the rest of us. (T: I’m sure Goop makes those, too.) (R:Witch Mist on sale now!) Gerbert asks what Satu did with Meridiana, the witch in the box. Satu answers truthfully that she let her go. Gerbert asks if Diana is more powerful than Meridiana, and Satu says yes. Gerbert is mad that Satu kept him from all that power. He creeps real close to Satu, and she’s shaking in fear. Gerbert notes that Diana really did defeat her good, considering that her power hasn’t come back. Satu says that Baldwin is keeping her alive and locked up here because she’s dangerous to him. Doesn’t Gerbert want to know why? Gerbert pulls her hair. I think that means yes, but violent.
Rebecca: I’m disappointed this is how Satu’s character is being used at the moment. She’s more interesting than these Big Bad Men who all look the same. I hope she gets back out in the world soon.
Mari: Hard agree.
Miriam and Matthew are still at Diana’s side. Miriam says that Diana did a very brave thing, considering that Matthew may not have been able to stop drinking from her. (T: Bravery, death wish, they’re the same!) She’s full of surprises, including the fact that she has witch fire power, which is not something that came up in her DNA markers. Miriam wants to study Diana more. Matthew says no, but Miriam says that they could really learn a lot about witch lineages and powers they thought were extinct. Matthew says he’ll ask Diana.
At that, Diana stirs. Miriam makes herself scarce. Diana pets Matthew’s face as she says that he’s craved her all this time, and yet he resisted her. (T: She’s clearly so into it, and I’m so upset.) She asks if Matthew loved Juliette, and he admits that he did once, but she was Gerbert’s creature. Diana’s like “I killed her…. and I’d do it again bop bop.” No ragrets. Matthew is more concerned with the fact that they have nowhere to hide. He asks what if they time walked? What if they hid somewhere in time?
Baldwin arrives at the congregation and orders a servant to gather everyone to decide Satu’s fate. (T: If these dudes kill Satu, I’m leaving.) (R: Same.) He calls Matthew and lets him know that Gerbert knows Satu is in Venice and is asking the Congregation to get back together. When they do, it will be impossible to stop them from investigating further, presumably into the Matthew/Diana thing. Their time is running out.
Rebecca: If this hiding in time thing isn’t cool and interesting, I’m gonna be so pissed. Like if they just go, “Same house, but now it’s the ’70s!” please. Diana just shot a fire arrow, I know the cool potential is there.
Mari: I do like how we are already bracing for disappointment.
After the call, Matthew notices that the doors to the living room are rattling. He investigates and from the fireplace flies a little… something. Diana joins him and he asks what the something is. It’s a poppet, which witches use to cast spells. Matthew recalls that her ancestor Brigid Bishop got into some trouble because of poppets, and Diana confirms that one was used as evidence when she was convicted at Salem. Diana examines the poppet and finds a pearl earring. To you and I, it may seem like… a pearl earring… but Matthew knows that it’s Ysabeau’s and she lost it hundreds of years ago. He wonders what the heck the house is trying to tell them.
Thais: I have so many questions for Matthew, starting with, how deeply has he cataloged his sire’s jewelry collection?
Mari: Honestly, because it was just… a pearl earring.
We get a brief look at Ysabeau at Sept-Tours, sitting at her dead husband’s desk. Then we see Hamish looking through old books. Then Marthe hands Hamish something and says Matthew will also need this thing. Hamish promises to make sure he gets it. Ysabeau sends Matthew and Diana all her love with Hamish.
Back at the Bishop house, Marcus is objecting to the time walking idea. Matthew acknowledges the risks, but they need to hide. Emily asks what Diana thinks, and she says that she needs to go somewhere and sometime when she can learn about her magic. Matthew knows that they need three objects from a specific time and place to travel there, so he’s got that stuff coming since he’s old as shit. But how do they get back? Emily says it’s very hard and they will need powerful spells. Sarah adds that it will require training.
Cut to training, in the woods. The training mostly consists of telling her to open her mind and focus. Groundbreaking.
Diana fails the first time.
Thais: And asks how come it didn’t work? Like, you’ve never shown interest in developing your magic, now you want it to work with no effort? Who am I kidding, of course it’s going to work in a few minutes.
Mari: Em tells her to stop focusing on the details of the room she’s traveling to and focus on Matthew. She wants to be with him, right? Magic is in the heart.
Rebecca: The fucking eye roll I just did.
Mari: It was a collective eyeroll.
Matthew is pacing because he’s worried. Miriam tells him to calm down.
Diana focuses and uses her heart magic. And time walks into the house. Matthew hugs her and says he knew she could do it. Miriam looks shocked. Maybe it’s supposed to be that she’s impressed with Diana’s mad skills, appearing out of nowhere, but I’d like to think it’s because Matthew is all “I knew you could!” when one second ago he was like “she could be stuck in time!!”
Rebecca: I’m with you, Mari. She had a very this lying, motherfucker look on her face.
Mari: I thought so.
Gerbert visits Knox, and reveals that he knows that the prophecy about the witch with the blood of the lion and the wolf is about Diana. Wow. He… did not previously know this…? Wow. (T: He says he’s been trying to figure out the prophecy forever, when it’s been a couple of days since we heard it with him.) Gerbert also knows that Baldwin is helping his brother and Diana. If they can prove it, they can remove Baldwin from the Congregation and then find Diana.
Hamish arrives at the Bishop house with everything Matthew requested and some add-ons: Sophie and Nathaniel! (R: AIIIEEEEE!!!) I am actually pretty excited about this moment. Not because I think them finally meeting will be astonishing, but because I’ve always liked Sophie and Nathaniel more than most of these characters so I’m happy for them to fulfill their quest.
Thais: I officially don’t know the difference between Hamish and Baldwin anymore. So sorry, y’all!
Rebecca: Same.
Mari: I only know because I’m recapping and I can say with confidence that at this moment, it barely matters.
Inside, Sophie explains that she wanted to meet Diana sooner but didn’t know where she was until Agatha told her. Matthew asks how they can trust a demon on the Congregation, and Nathaniel tells him shortly that Agatha is his mother. Sophie hands over the status of Diana she’s been carrying around, the one that has been passed down in her family until this time. Matthew recognizes it as a chess piece he lost in a wager many years ago. Sophie wonders how it got to be in her family, and Matthew says he has no idea. Nathaniel wants to leave, but Sophie says no. She trusts these people and they should know: her parents were witches and she is a demon. Everyone is astonished at the news.
Later, Emily shows Sophie and Nathaniel upstairs to their room.
Diana and Matthew are holding the chess piece and Ysabeau’s lost earring respectively. Matthew says these two things were in the same place on the same night: All Soul’s Night. They know this all has to do with their time walking. And All Soul’s Night is in 6 days. They’ll have to be ready by then.
Rebecca: I like the long setup of the chess piece getting to Diana. I enjoy when story elements are sprinkled in early, but it feels like the earring didn’t get the same care and attention, and I wish it had. It would have been fun to see two objects circling around the story only to come together when Diana and Matthew needed them the most.
Mari: For them to have planted the chess piece so early and literally shoot an earing out at the eleventh hour… a choice.
On the porch, Sophie is carving pumpkins with Em and Sarah. (T: She adorably has carved entirely too many, and I could follow these folks for the rest of the show.) Nat and Marcus are chopping wood and chatting in the driveway. Sophie is glad to see it, knowing that Nat needs someone to talk to. He wants to change the world, but it’s hard to do it alone. Em asks who Sophie talks to. She says she’s fine, but there is a real hard sniffle that follows those words. Plus, Em heard her crying in the bathroom last night. After a push from Sarah, Sophie shares that she keeps having this dream that the Congregation are coming for her and her baby. Em says she’s amongst witches now, and they will do everything they can to not let that happen.
Rebecca: Okay new show! Nat and Sophie stay with the Aunts and raise a witch/demon baby. Make it a sitcom. Call it Two and a Half Witches.
Mari: Immediately yes. Immediately.
Nat gets a call from his mother. He says they’ve got 3 witches, 3 vampires and 3 demons at the Bishop house and no one has died yet. His mom shares that she’s on her way back to Venice as the Congregation is reconvening. She passes a message for Diana to be careful.
Rebecca: o no is she gonna die? She said “I love you.”
Mari: Diana and Matthew are dressed up and ready to test time walk back 25 days. It works and they arrive at Sept-Tours on the night they spent dancing.
Thais: So I guess time-walking is time-and-space-walking since she can travel all the way from the Midwestern US to France?
Mari: Correct.
We watch them briefly at dinner and then Matthew dances with his mom again. (R: for 8 million years. I am so bored.)
Back in Venice, Knox and Gerbert are still plotting. Gerbert was present when Phillipe first set up the Congregation. He made it so a De Clairmont must always be on the team. If they kick Baldwin out, and Matthew is a no, then Marcus is next. Gerbert says they won’t have any problems with him, though. (T: I agree, Marcus seems pretty meek.) Knox knows Baldwin won’t go easily, but Gerbert is confident they can beat him.
Bishop House. Matthew confirms that he got to say goodbye to his mom. Nat is telling Marcus that he doesn’t want him anywhere near his baby’s DNA. Miriam asks if he doesn’t want to know if his baby is witch or demon. Sophie wants to know. Sarah stands and proposes a toast to unusual friendships.
Thais: They seem pretty casual about this idea. Just, “I guess we’ll be stuck in a different time, then?”
Mari: Later, Hamish and Diana are sitting on the porch together. Hamish says that Matthew is keeping his cards close to his chest. Doesn’t Diana want to know where they are going? Diana says no. She just wants to be present for the time she has left in the present. Girlfriend, you can spare a minute to ask pertinent questions and then be present all you want. Hamish also brings up the fact that Diana will be totally reliant on Matthew in the past, and that Matthew himself will be a different person. (T: And he’s already such a catch now, soo….) Diana stays quiet.
The Congregation gathers for Satu’s trial.
Nathaniel, Sophie and Hamish prepare to leave. (T: I’m confused. This was just an overnight international visit? To deliver a figurine? Huh?) (R: Noooo! My sitcom!!) Matthew gives Nat a paper with Sept-Tours’ address and tells him to bring Sophie there if things get bad. Em and Sarah will be there, too, because he doesn’t want them at the Bishop House when the Congregation comes calling. Matthew says there is a big fight ahead of them, and Nat says he’s been fighting all his life.
Diana thanks Sophie for bringing the statue. Sophie is glad she did and glad she met Diana. It all feels important.
Rebecca: So either all these people are going to die or Diana and Matthew will be gone longer than planned? Or, it’s not important and the show is bad.
Mari: lol
Hamish asks Matthew about the Book of Life. What if someone gets their hands on it while they are gone. Matthew says in the present, the book is missing pages anyway. In the past, however, it is whole. Hamish tells him to come back with the book. They say goodbye and leave.
At the trial, Satu admits that she abducted Diana. Baldwin is like cool, you are kicked out and the witches will punish you BYE. Satu keeps talking, though, and says that she did it because she believes that Baldwin was working with Matthew to keep Diana from the witches. And she was proven right. (T: Oops!) Satu says she took Diana to a safe place and Matthew and Baldwin followed them there. Baldwin says there is no proof. Plus, why would he help his brother? Gerbert tells everyone about the Knights of Lazarus, established by Phillipe and his sons to further the vampire cause. Baldwin says it’s philanthropic. They protect those who cannot protect themselves. Knox accuses him of having been ordered to protect Diana, but he says he hasn’t. Gerbert calls him out on the lie, though, on account of being able to hear his heartbeat. Knox calls it a vampire conspiracy to keep Diana and the Book of Life to themselves. Gerbert says to prove he isn’t in cahoots with Baldwin, he’s calling for him to step down from the Congregation, effective immediately. Baldwin says he doesn’t intend on stepping down, so Gerbert says they’ll make him. Agatha chimes in and says that they don’t use force in this chamber. Gerbert stands up, murderously, and declares that Baldwin has committed treason and the punishment is beheading and death by fire. Agatha objects again, saying that they all have a vote on what happens in this chamber. (T: Agatha’s the only one who can keep her shit together here.) (R: right? men are so emotional.) Satu asks if that includes her. Knox says yes, considering that she’s still technically a member of the Congregation. Baldwin says he is, too, then. Gerbert starts to call for a vote, but Agatha says she needs to take a recess and confer with the other demons.
Rebecca: I love when one of the old white guys is like, “This is how it’s done! We wrote it hundreds of years ago and no one wrote another way to do it so we do it this way!”
Mari: Topical.
Em and Sarah pack up their car to head off to Sept-Tours. (T: LOL are they driving there?) There are tearful hugs and goodbyes.
The Congregation re-reconvenes for a vote. Three people vote against Baldwin: Knox, Gerbert and Satu. Domenico very pointedly doesn’t vote with them. He really took that “greedy little shit” insult to heart. I love it. So, Baldwin is safe, (R: yay?) but Knox still demands to know where Matthew and Diana are.
Later, Domenico tells Baldwin that he’ll be hearing from him. And then Agatha finds him too to say that she’s got her reasons to protect Diana, but Baldwin owes them a debt. Baldwin is very in debt.
At the Bishop house, Miriam swabs Diana’s mouth so they can continue to study her while she’s gone. And then it’s time for Miriam and Marcus to leave, too. (T: To give them alone time, which… they will have plenty of in the past?) Miriam hates goodbyes so she just gives Matthew an arm squeeze. Alone, Matthew gives Marcus a very fancy paper that declares him the new Grand Master of the Knights of Lazarus. Marcus is like “I can’t!” and Matthew is like “you must.” And they hug. (T: This must be a group just for dude vampires. I would have picked Miriam.) (R: A much, much better choice.)
Matthew is brooding on the porch. Diana uses her magic to light the jack-o-laterns, and Matthew smiles for one second, but then broodingly says it’s time to go. (R: Way to ruin the fun, you wet blanket.)
Baldwin calls Matthew, who doesn’t answer. He leaves a voicemail telling him his time has run out. He has to go now.
We watch as Knox, Satu and Baldwin arrive, cloaked in magic. Satu’s magic is back. Meanwhile, Matthew and Diana are chatting it up upstairs. He reveals that they are going to London 1590. (T: Such a good time for women. I’m sure Diana will love it.)
The house is protected by magic, but Satu prepares to break it down.
Upstairs, Matthew and Diana prepare to time walk….. really slowly.
Satu busts the door down.
Diana spins around in shock.
The end.
Okay a few things:
1- Satu just joining forces with Knox and Gerbert is so stupid to me. Satu, WHY. You would never, girl. PLEASE.
Thais: Right? They were so close to letting her be executed!
Rebecca: I AM SO MAD!!! This better lead to some ultimate Satu betrayal for fuck’s sake.
2- The beginning and middle of this season were SO BORING, but these final 3 episodes did so much better at pacing and, you know, actually having story. And while Diana’s emotional powers can be sometimes eye-rolly, the visuals around her powers are generally cool.
3- God, Diana and Matthew are bland. I fee like I like pretty much everyone, except like Knox and Gerbert, better than them.
(Thais: And don’t forget Gillian, I def don’t love her, but I can’t remember if she’s still alive.)
Rebecca: I genuinely want to like Diana and Matthew’s relationship. This vampire has no personality excepting sweater-sniffing, and it’s getting old. Diana at least jokes around sometimes, I think? Well, she definitely did once or twice, and that’s something. Please someone magic Matthew some actual charisma I’m begging.
4- I think this season is still better than the first book, which was also boring and sometimes bland, but never got better and had 0 cool visuals.
Next time on A Discovery of Witches: Did they time walk? Find out in Season 2!
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
I'm a loud Brazilian who loves all things fantasy, horror, and YA. I spend most of my spare time reading, bellydancing, making lists, and watching way too much TV. My name is pronounced Tah-ees (it doesn't have a notable meaning, but there's a French opera with the same name!).
I am a book, movie, and TV fanatic over the age of 30. I love baking, video games, and D&D. Legally I must tell you I am a disaster. I've written like 6 novels but haven't had the real courage to query agents yet, and also I don't know how to make decisions (DISASTER). So please send me wine for Courage. Maybe a heart too. Oh and also a brain.
