Previously: We found the real worst school for magic.
Content warnings: Violence, nudity, gore, ableism, incest, infertility, and a hysterectomy.
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Betrayer Moon
Marines: A very dirty boy is on a bed. We only see him from the neck up, but we can tell he is struggling. He is also telling a story, and I just feel like he should focus that energy on either surviving or showering. In the shadows, a man we cannot see is standing. He is wearing a wolf medallion. A second man is sitting on the bed, tending to Dirty Dying Boy. We now see that Dirty Dying’s got three deep gashes on his chest. The story Dirty Dying spends his breath on is about a monster pregnancy and how that’s the kind of monster who got him. He swears it to the Witcher who steps out of the shadows. The man tending Dirty Dying shushes him, but maybe he should stitch him? Like those wounds are just gaping, chilling.
The Witcher names his price: three thousand Orens, up front. The man pays up, Dirty Dying coughs his last breaths, and the man yells over his dead body.
Ginny: How is dabbing Dirty Dying man’s mouth with a nasty cloth going to help when he’s got gaping wounds on his chest? I’m shocked he died. SHOCKED.
Mari: Cut to Other Witcher on his mission. He finds a blood trail, which it leads to a meat locker. Nothing about this is good. Other Witcher’s eyeballs are all black so he’s had his Witcher Herbs and Spices, but they are no match for whatever monster is here. It moves too quickly for Other Witcher to even see. And it ultimately gets him before he even strikes at all.
Cut to a sweaty Geralt in bed with a woman. She points out a scar and says she knows this one, and starts singing a song about a vampiress. She finds another scare on his stomach and attributes it to a kikimora. Then she finds a scar on his knee and says she doesn’t remember the bard singing of this one. It’s the wound that Renfri gave him. Geralt’s face shows he’s in physical pain over this. He hates it here.
Jessica: Everyone is very sweaty and scantily clad. I am not complaining.
Mari: 3/3 Snark Ladies love it here.
The woman asks who would dare and try and rob him of his treasure. A woman? Geralt says it was a princess. She asks if Geralt was in love and what was her name? Geralt drily replies that when you live as long as he does, all the names start to sound the same. The woman is not happy with that answer. She sits up and drinks a swig of water, saying that if destiny were “a kinder bitch,” a whore like her wouldn’t have to settle for her client’s telltales.
Ginny: Lady, he doesn’t want to talk. That’s not what he paid for. Let us enjoy sweaty Geralt in bed thank you and goodnight.
Mari: After a pause, the woman says that a friend of Geralt’s came through a month ago, headed to Temeria. Another Witcher. Geralt sits up at this and interrupts the woman to ask what’s in Temeria. They are both interrupted by pounding on the door. A man says it’s been three nights, so Geralt has to pay up and leave. Geralt ignores that for now and asks the woman about Temeria again. She says they have a pest problem. The miners there rounded up 3,000 Orens to have it dealt with, but Other Witcher took the coin and ran. More pounding on the door. Geralt grabs his coin purse and hands it over to the women, but it’s not enough.
Ginny: He had to sit through questions about his scars and past relationships. He deserves a discount.
Mari: Every introvert seconds this motion.
We cut to Geralt, outside, telling Roach not to judge him. (J: But it definitely looks like he does though. I love Roach sass, it’s my favorite.) Geralt turns back to the innkeeper and says he’ll be back in a few days with the rest of the payment. He threatens that if anything happens to his horse… The innkeeper says Geralt doesn’t scare him. Geralt’s expression hardens, and he gets real close to Innkeeper’s face. Geralt asks to be pointed to Temeria and it sure seems like Innkeeper IS scared of Geralt as he silently points in the general direction.
Ginny: You best take care of Roach!
Mari: After the title card, that good fantasy music plays us through Geralt walking a cold and lonely road. A helpful sign tells us that Temeria is realm of monsters and cowardly kings.
Streets. A bunch of angry miners are gathered, discussing striking until the king does something about the monster that is terrorizing them. Someone else suggests just moving on, heading south and finding new work. A third man goes even more XTREME and tells them in Nilfgaard, the usurper rallied the people and took the kingdom for a lousy king. Third Man says they do the same here. Everyone cheers.
Ginny: This plan doesn’t seem to include how they’re actually going to get rid of the monster.
Mari: An amazing point and apparently Geralt, who is hanging out near them, agrees. He judges their plan hard. Xtreme Plan Man isn’t excited to see another Witcher, since they’ve already been swindled by one. (G: Well it’s not like you’re going to attempt to kill it.) Geralt lays out new terms: payment after he’s done and at a third of the price as an apology from his guild to theirs. Xtreme Plan asks what happens if Geralt can’t kill the monster. Geralt matter-of-factly says he’ll die then.
Geralt asks Soldier in Charge if Foltest has a plan. Soldier in Charge answers by telling some soldiers to see Geralt to their borders. Temeria has had their fill of Witchers.
Ginny: Honestly don’t know why any Witcher would even bother to help anyone. No one is grateful.
Mari: It’s very poorly explained why everyone is this salty towards Witches anyway. You want your monsters killed or not?
Border. The soldiers who are accompanying Geralt are mysteriously knocked from their horses. Geralt draws his sword and looks out into the creepy, foggy snow. A woman is out there, and she tells him he can put down his sword. She isn’t going to hurt him. Geralt’s like OKAY WITCH, A LIKELY STORY. The woman says she’s a sorceress who works for King Foltest. This is Triss Merigold, my forever favorite from the video games who was done kinda dirty in the books.
Ginny: I really need to read the books.
Jessica: I don’t know the books, but she seems pretty cool. I’ll root for her for now. SINCE RENFRI IS DEAD. #neverforget
Mari: Geralt is not impressed with the King’s plan to publicly kick Geralt out and then send his errand girl to pay him to kill the monster. Triss says it’s her plan and her coin. Plus, she doesn’t want Geralt to kill the monster. She wants him to save it. Geralt just looks at her for a long time.
And then, after establishing more snowy fog over Temeria shots, we cut to somewhere underground-looking as Triss tells Geralt the history of the monster: it started attacking six years ago and it’s coming from the crypt where the king’s sister, Adda, is buried. Rumor has it that she was having an affair when she died. Geralt asks if she was pregnant, and Triss says if she were, that child would be the sole heir to the throne. Foltest fled the castle, the creature has kept killing, and the Brotherhood sent Triss here to cure the creature. Geralt says vokudlak can’t be cured. Triss replies that it’s a good thing the creature isn’t a vokudlak. I still have no idea what a vokudlak is, but I’ll be happy if I can stop typing it.
Ginny: Hopefully we’re good on the vokudlak front now that we know this is not a vokudlak.
Jessica: I sense the start of a new drinking game…
Mari: Deeper underground, Triss offers Geralt 2,000 Orens if he can identify exactly what killed all these people. And there are a bunch of dead people, their bodies preserved in salt. Geralt spots Other Witcher from the cold open. His eyes are gouged out. Geralt grabs Other Witcher’s medallion, pissed that Triss let everyone believe that Other Witcher fled with their coin. She was obviously trying to cover up the fact that whatever this creature is, it bested a Witcher. (G: Rude!)
Geralt gets on with examining the body, digging his hand into Other Witcher’s hollow chest. He determines that the heart and liver are missing, and there is only one creature who is that picky: a striga. Triss thinks strigas are old wives tales, but Geralt says they are just rare. It means that someone put a curse on Adda, but it didn’t stop with Adda. She was pregnant with a girl who is now the striga.
Ginny: Talk about a rough childhood. You’re a lonely striga and everyone keeps thinking you’re a vokudlak.
Mari: Truly, the worst.
Aretuza. Yennefer and Istredd are having sex. She’s conjured up a whole audience though? Istredd is like “um, they are just watching us” but Yennefer ignores that and keeps riding. And when they are done, the conjured audience claps for them. (G: weird power flex but ok.) We cut to them getting dressed. Isredd asks how long she thinks they will get to keep doing this. Yennefer doesn’t know, what with him about to go on some exploration. Yen says that maybe he will be too busy for her. He says maybe she will be too busy for him, especially after she’s had a taste of Aedirn revelry and King Virfuril’s hotness.
They keep bantering until the topic of the initiation comes up. Yen has feelings because all the others see their ideal self so clearly. They all know what they want for their enchantments. Istredd tells her to stop worrying so much, but she thinks that’s easy for him to say, since the boys can go do their magic without changing anything. Istredd gets serious and asks Yen what she wants. She considers and answers that she wants to go back to Aedirn and never be the scared, powerless girl Istredd first met again.
We cut to Yen meeting with her magic plastic surgeon, or whatever. He’s very dramatic and also he calls her nature’s first draft, which is rude as hell. Yen picks out a gray gown and is holding it up to her body when Tissaia walks in. She sends Magic Surgeon out of the room and gets close to Yen for a pep talk: everyone looks in the mirror and sees some deformity, except them. They get to remake themselves on their own terms. Yen can “free the victim in the mirror forever.” Yen says she doesn’t know where to begin, so Tissaia tells her to close her eyes and imagine the most powerful woman in the world.
Ginny: Thinking about what I would change if I had a magical plastic surgeon. I definitely would have been one of the girls turned into an eel, though.
Mari: Without a doubt. I would’ve been eeled like the first night, tbh.
Geralt and Triss are before King Foltest, his captain of the guard, and Soldier in Charge. Foltest is stuffing his face, and while not exactly appealing, I haven’t eaten dinner yet. I would also like to be stuffing my face. Captain is prickly about the whole situation, not believing anyone would curse Adda, and definitely not believing the rumors that she had a lover. Geralt starts describing the monster, and how she slithered out of her mother’s womb. (G: are you still hungry?) (M: -_-) That’s enough for Foltest, who orders Geralt to leave. Geralt makes his way to the door and then does a little “after you” gesture to Triss and the soldiers. And they walk out first, giving Geralt enough time to close and lock the door behind them. Classic. I can’t believe they fell for that, am I right?
Mari: Alone now, Geralt asks Foltest who the princess’s father was. Foltest threatens Geralt, but Geralt presses. He noticed Foltests’s reaction when he mentioned the striga’s father. Foltest reminds Geralt that he is a king, and that’s pretty much Geralt’s point. Foltest could kill the striga, produce an heir, and this whole nightmare would be behind him. So, who is the striga’s father? Foltest says that when he was a kid, he used to hear stories about how the mutations Witchers endure make them void of emotions. He figures it must be true, because only someone like that could accuse a brother of sleeping with his murdered sister.
Ginny: You’re not helping your case dude when you are very clearly trying to change the subject.
Mari: On top of that, that’s not even what Geralt is saying, dude. He’s accusing you of sleeping with your sister… who was later murdered not of sleeping with your murdered sister. I feel like there’s a pretty big difference, though yes, all of it is unpleasant.
Jessica: I feel like it’s Game of Thrones’ fault that that distinction needs to be pointed out, too. Also, why is incest suddenly a part of every epic fantasy show???
Mari: I wish I had an answer.
Fotest’s men finally break down the door, though Foltest stops them from attacking Geralt. Foltest tells Geralt to leave Temeria and never return.
Ginny: Geralt is really earning his coin here from these fools.
Mari: Sorcerers in a Circle. Tissaia tells everyone that Cintra continues their animosity toward their organization. King Dagaorad has banned mages. King Dagaorad was Calanthe’s father, reminding us all that the Yen at magic school portion of this is way in the past.
The update on Nilfgaard is that King Fergus sucks. Tissaia says that Fringilla will be there by end of week (G: with “sanity and bread”) (J: So…. helpful?) (M: Almost too good to believe.) One of the mages, Stregebor, says that Fringilla is fine, but is only capable of doing what she’s told. He says this with apologies to her uncle, who is also in attendance. It’s soon clear to me, though, that this is rehearsed. Said Uncle is like hmmm, too true, maybe we can consider sending someone there with a bit more SPINE. Then he passes it back to Stregebor who comes through with a spine joke and suggestion that Yennefer be the who goes to Nilfgaard. His trump card is that Yennefer is of elven blood, something nobody is supposed to know, and something about the politics with Cintra mean that she can’t serve in Aedirn as part elf.
Ginny: That’s great that Yennifer has elven blood and all but I’m team sanity and bread.
Mari: A deep 2020 mood.
Tissaia calls Uncle out on this blatant nepotism, but he suggests that they put it up to a vote. He’ll even recuse himself. All in favor of sending Yen Nilfgaard instead of Fringilla?
We cut to Yen standing with her dress again, looking in the mirror. Magic Surgeon comes in and grabs back the gray dress, handing her a red number, telling her that King Fergus chose this dress. Yen is confused.
We cut again to Yen storming into Tissaia’s office, demanding an audience with the Chapter. Tissaia says she handles court assignments and new information came out tonight that made her think Yen would be a better fit for Nilfgaard. Yen says she thinks Tissaia was overruled by the Chapter, and mocks her for this. Tissaia stands and tells her it was actually Yen’s own blood, as efforts in Cintra prevent them from placing anyone with elven blood in Aedirn’s court. Yen thinks Tissaia told the Chapter about her parentage, but she didn’t. Stregebor did. From there, Yen can guess the rest.
Ginny: Well look on the bright side Yen. You’re not an eel.
Mari: Or a vokudlak.
Striga Castle. Geralt is crouched, waiting, looking at the two guards who nervously guard the entrance. Triss finds him there and asks what he’s doing, if he’s going to kill the girl, and why he cares. Geralt asks why Triss cares and neither of them answer. She figures that Geralt has already thought of a way past the guards. Geralt picks up a rock, throws it so it thuds against the door, and the guards run away in a panic. Which fair. They lasted pretty long considering the creepy snow and crows and stuff.
Ginny: Guaranteed they aren’t getting paid enough for this.
Mari: Whatever it is, it isn’t enough.
Inside the castle, Triss is talking about being able to sense secrets and dead bodies. (J: Fun trick.) She sees a portrait of Adda and Foltest as kids and wonders what happened to them. When Geralt doesn’t answer, she asks if not answering questions is part of his brooding charm. He stares at her for a long time. He really likes doing that. He does ultimately answer, though: Foltest is the striga’s father.
They find Adda’s room and start poking around. Geralt sniffs deeply. Triss finds a creepy music box, which is mostly creepy because it is a music box in a creepy place. It has a hidden compartment and inside are letters from Adda’s mother, Queen Sancia.
Cut to Triss and Geralt showing Soldier in Charge [SiC] the letters. Apparently, the letters prove that Sancia cursed her own children for their affair. Geralt asks what SiC’s relationship with Adda was. He says that he was her confidante and protector. He even puts forth the idea that Adda’s relationship with Foltest wasn’t consensual– Foltest raped Adda and cursed the child to cover it up. Geralt considers that but then gets right up in SiC’s face (SEE?) and says the only problem with that story is that he smelled SiC all over Adda’s sheets. Old scents and new scents. SiC nervously asks what he would be doing in a dead girl’s bed, but Geralt smelled exactly what he was doing. SiC cracks, yelling that Foltest had no right. He seduced her and abused his power and was always nagging her for attention. SiC cursed Foltest as payback, refusing to just expose the affair and hurt Adda in the process. Geralt asks him how they lift the curse, but SiC says he won’t tell. So Geralt punches him in the face.
Ginny: That would basically be my first reaction. Does anyone take responsibility for their selfish actions around these parts?
Mari: Aretuza. The initiation ceremony is happening, but Yen is missing. Istredd wonders where she is and Fringilla hears his thoughts and think-responds with a “haven’t you heard?”
Jessica: Telepathy seems to be the magic kids’ version of note passing or a group text.
Mari: I would imagine you’d be even more likely to get caught.
Istredd finds Yen down in their bone caves. She’s writing a letter for her father to sign, pinky promising he’s her real dad and she’s not of elven blood. Istredd tells her that won’t work. Besides, she’s already missed the ceremony. The enchantments have been cast. They argue about spying on each other, since he told her secrets to Stregebor, but Istredd wants to make it right. He wants Yen to travel with him while he conducts his research. Yen says that sounds like slow suicide. He doesn’t think she can mean that, but she does, and she keeps pushing him away. Istredd realizes how much he’s been played, just like Stregebor said he’d be. Yen doesn’t want to be schooled by Istredd and his romantic view of the world, when her world is cruel. Istredd tells her that victimhood is not her color, and she spits back that heroism isn’t his.
Before Yen leaves, Istredd tells her that she’s just really mad because she lost her chance to be beautiful. To have all eyes on her. Yen says it’s what she is owed. Istredd tells her that no amount of power or beauty will ever make her feel worthy of either.
Ginny: “There’s a million things I haven’t done but just you wait, just you wait.” – Alexander Hamiltion and Yennifer of Vengerberg
Mari: Accurate.
Ball. All the sorceress are dancing with their kings. Fringilla is dancing with King Virfuril, but he is not having it (G: Did she not bring him the sanity and bread?) (M: Definitely should’ve lead with that.) He stops her mid-dance and suggests they take a rest. Tissaia is making the rounds and stops to greet Queen Sancia and her children, Adda and Foltest. ~TIMELINES~
Tissaia moves on and greets Virfuril, who rudely says that an Aedirnian would’ve had better footwork than Frangilla.
Ginny: What a wanker. Get over yourself.
Mari: 0 sanity and 0 bread for you.
Yen finds Magic Surgeon and goads him into performing the beauty surgery on her. He says he’ll need time to prepare the anesthesia herbs, but Yen says she doesn’t need them.
Ginny: You might want to reconsider that, Yen. That chair with the restraints is not a joke.
Mari: In the future, Geralt gets back to the abandoned castle only to find a bunch of Foltest’s men blocking the entrance. He’s like DEEP SIGH, but gets ready to fight them all off. Foltest walks out, however, and he calls off his men. Foltest is v emotional as he asks Geralt if this will really work. Geralt honestly says he doesn’t know. Foltest asks if his daughter will be normal. (J: Dude are you serious??) Geralt answers that she’ll need special care, since she has lived as an animal for so many years.
After thinking about it for a long moment, Geralt gives Foltest Renfri’s brooch as a gift for the princess once he lifts the curse. Geralt says this isn’t his first time trying to save a princess who others see as a monster. Foltest asks what happened to that other princess, and Geralt has to say that he killed her, so maybe this wasn’t the best story to bring up just now. (G: lol seriously. I think Geralt has had enough at this point.) Foltest says he really tried not to be incest-y, but incest won in the end. He envies Geralt living forever and never falling in love. Geralt looks pained, because people always say this type of stuff to him. “God, I love how emotionless and alone you are!” And Geralt is weeping on the inside.
Ginny: No wonder why Geralt is pissed and chugging herbs. He’s gotta fight this thing until dawn?!
Mari: The Other Witcher didn’t last a minute.
Yen is getting ready for surgery. She asks Magic Surgeon to leave her eyes and the scars from her attempted suicide. Magic Surgeon tells her that the cost of the surgery is the ability to have children. Yen consents.
Ginny: Ok, at first when she said leave my eyes “and these as well,” I thought she was referencing her boobs and not her scars.
Mari: They are nice boobs. Worth keeping.
The striga comes out of her crypt. Geralt is all pale and black eyed and ready to fight. He leaves SiC still tied up in the room, despite his pleading to be released. The striga finds him there and disembowels him.
Ginny: That’s what you get you idiot.
Jessica: Definitely not crying over that one.
Mari: We watch the striga walk through the castle, screeching and gross, umbilical cord still attached and dragging, and honestly I can’t believe I’m watching this again. I hate it. Geralt is waiting for the striga with a silver chain. He winds it up and around the striga, and we see the silver burn her, but then she makes short work of breaking out of it. “Fuck,” Geralt says. The correct reaction.
In one of the most heavy-handed moments of the entire series, and that’s saying a whole heck of a lot, we cut from the striga to Yen having a hysterectomy. Her yells meld with the striga’s screeches.
Ginny: I’m crossing my legs while watching this. Dear lord this is rough. Do you think she is regretting not getting the herbs now?
Mari: 1000% yes.
Geralt and the striga fight. It’s going okay for Geralt until the striga slams Geralt to the floor and then drools all over him. I’m sure he’s more upset by the slamming, so it is up to me to be most upset by the drool. The striga picks Geralt up and starts slamming him into walls. He has to poke her eyeballs to get her to drop him, but she still throws him again and he loses his sword. The striga ends up on top of Geralt once more, and he has to use Aard to blast through the floor, creature and Witcher falling to the next level down.
Geralt is up and moving faster than the striga. We get faster cuts between Geralt, setting up magic barriers and Yen’s magic surgery. She screams, the striga attacks Geralt. Yen’s bones are shifted, causing her a lot of pain. The striga tries to run out of the room, but comes up agains the barrier Geralt erected. When the striga attacks again, Geralt punches her with silver knuckles. Yen is screaming. The sun comes up. The striga and Geralt both make a mad dash for her crypt, but Geralt knocks the striga out of the way and gets there first, climbing inside and sealing the crypt with magic. The striga screeches. Yen screams.
Ginny: We’re all screaming!
Jessica: You scream – I scream – we all scream for …. sanity and bread?
Mari: Geralt lets himself out of the crypt and sees the princess, now in a human body, naked on the ground in a fetal position. Geralt approaches her slowly and cut to Yen, in an identical position. Because see the parallel here DO YOU SEE IT? LOOK AT IT.
Geralt gently rolls the princess over. She’s awake, but scared, and she’s still got claw-like nails. She attacks Geralt, getting him in the throat really good. He bites her neck to get her to back off, but he’s bleeding profusely and passes out.
Ball. Yen makes her grand entrance and makes a bee line for Virfuril. Tissaia tries to head her off, but it’s too late. She’s introduced herself to Virfuril as Yennefer of Vengerberg, one of his subjects, and just the type of mage he was in the market for. Virfuril leads her out onto the dance floor and they sexy dance. Fringilla runs away, upset. Istredd, Stregebor, Sabrina and Tissaia all watch Yen dance with a variety of “oh, damn” emotions.
Ginny: “I am not throwin’ away my shot.” – Alexander Hamilton and Yennifer of Vengerberg, post magic surgery.
Mari: Triss tends to Geralt’s wounds. He calls out for Renfri while unconscious. When he comes to, he asks after the striga princess, who is alive, and spending time with the Sisters of Melitele. (J: God help those Sisters.) Foltest told everyone that SiC defeated a vokudlak, and the joke was on me because I had to type vokudlak one more time. (G: It’s almost over.) Geralt is ready to collect his coin and be on his way. Triss asks who Renfri is, and Geralt is unsurprisingly unforthcoming. Tries doesn’t believe that Geralt is all about monsters and money. (J: No, but the title of his new album should be.) She tells him that they are each surrounded by a vortex of DESTINY! Geralt grabs the coin purse and inside is Renfri’s brooch, returned to him, perhaps meant for a different princess.
Ginny: I too sleepwalk but unfortunately I don’t think it has anything to do with DESTINY.
Mari: I’ll wrap up by saying that we talked about this at length during our podcast episode about The Witcher, but this show has some issues with ableism, it’s portrayal of women, and of infertility. This episode has all three and it’s centerpiece scene is one where we draw direct parallels between the striga and Yen. It felt gross to me and all the worse for the way it was so heavy handed.
I did not enjoy watching this the first time around, and somehow I made it through a second time around so VOKUDLAK and CHEERS TO ME FOR MAKING IT.
Next time on The Witcher: Geralt and Jaskier go to a ball in S01 E04 – Of Banquets, Bastards and Burials.
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
I'm a chronic book nerd and love storytelling in all forms. I'm particularly excited by the rise of the television show as an art form with long, cinematically beautiful plots and complex character arcs (I also watch cartoons). My travels in the past handful of years have led me through three continents and most recently landed me among the majestic mountains of Colorado. Some day I will compile all my travel journals/blogs into one place. Some day. Until then, you can find me with craft beer in hand, ready at any moment to deeply and passionately discuss survival tactics for the zombie apocalypse.
I'm a legal assistant in Boston who loves reading, snarking, cats and french fries. Oh let's not forget naps - naps are good. I blog about my life and whatever else I feel like blogging about. It's the melting pot of blogs.
