Dear Traumateers,
Lorraine: August was a crazy month (we tend to only have crazy months). After writing our TYMK post from Paris (!!!) we continued to drink lots of wine and have lots of fun for another 10 days. Then, sadly, we had to make our way back home and can we just say that neither of us are big fans? Leaving Paris, Sweeney and Harley was the saddest and I can honestly say that I’ve spent the last three weeks very frequently wishing it was vacation time again. Vacation all the days, all the time, always.
Sweeney: HOW ARE WE ALREADY SO FAR FROM VACATION? On the plus side, I can watch all the videos of us and, you know, cry into some chocolate or something.
Lor: I love that gif forever and now extra wish I were there.
Alas. We had to get back to regular life and crap. On the bright side: our Snark Squad schedule fell back into normalcy; we came back from Paris with lots of ideas for future projects; I brought home chocolate and cookies and cute little paintings for my room and a miniature light up Eiffel Tower; my bed is as wonderful as I remembered it.
So, that’s been our life this month. Vacation and then decidedly not vacation.
And with that, recap of recaps time.
Last Month:
Dawson had a terrible idea for a double date and Pacey kissed Joey to much rejection. Dawson scares all his friends on Friday the 13th and sabotages Jen’s budding relationship. Pacey and Joey enter a beauty contest and Katie Holmes butchers “On My Own.” Joey has a chance to go to France and somehow this leads to making out with Dawson. Ew. That ended season 1. Kirsti and Diva ranked the episodes and that mostly meant putting Pacey episodes at the top. Season two’s big starting plot point was basically that second kisses are hard. Dawson forgets Pacey’s birthday and is generally a terrible friend. The gang is paired off for a school project and Jen throws herself at Dawson.
In The OC, Ryan steals a car for his brother and brings Marissa along for the ride. Melodie covered the episode where Luke’s father is pulled out of the closet. (Here, we jump back in time to when we covered the Christmukah episode in 2012.) Next, Coyote Rose took us through the New Years episode, in which Ryan runs in slow motion to get his kiss with Marissa at midnight. Anna May launched our new favorite OTP, Sandy and Bagels and also Rooney randomly was a thing that happened. Ashlea covered a trip to Palm Springs in which Oliver got creepier, but no one believed Ryan about it. Wendy dusted off the good ole Stalker Boyfriend Meme thanks to the batshit behavior of both Oliver and Ryan. Oliver locks Marissa in a room and waves a gun at her, and for that, Dutchface called him a smeghead.
We wrapped up season one of Veronica Mars and gushed about our love for the impressive season. Season two started with the reveal that Veronica is dating Duncan and also a bus crash. Veronica helped prove the bus driver didn’t commit suicide and Wallace takes on a case of his own to impress a girl. Veronica spies on Kendall and discovers both a real estate scam and that she’s sleeping with Logan. Her next case involves taking easy money from a freaked out woman determined to find something wrong with her boyfriend.
In Rosewood, Spencer is not taking the Toby is A news well and refuses to attend another memorial for Ali. Emily and Jason find a picture of Ali on a boat with Wilden and accuse him of all manner of evil things. Mama Fitz comes back into the picture long enough to shit stir and Spencer gets looked in a steam room. Spencer finally tells the girls that Toby is part of the A team, but Emily refuses to believe it.
After a bit of a break, the girls finished season one of Supernatural and it ended with the Winchesters in a crazy car accident. Kirsti ranked the season one episodes while Sara had a baby. Following the accident and at the start of season two, Dean’s spirit roams around the hospital.
On Charmed, Prue is framed by her evil bosses and arrested by her ex-boyfriend. Speaking of ex-boyfriends, Phoebe’s is back, and a life of crime has changed him for the better. Kind of.
The Democracy Diva examined the Mockingjay propaganda posters and I’m sure none of use are yet over those tire pants.
Sweeney reviewed I’ll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson and gave it a B+.
Coming Up:
We still have quite a few things in the works – we can now definitively say that by the end of the year, we’ll have at least three new shows in our lineup – but only one is happening this coming month. As per your votes, we’ll be adding Gotham to the lineup. The show premieres on Fox on Monday, September 22nd, so be sure to tune in.
After a break for vacation and then to allow Sweeney to finish VEDA, Segue Magic will be back starting next month and we’re pretty excited about that and some vloggy projects that will follow closely behind it.
Really, we could save this final announcement for next month, but damn we love announcing things. While we’ll wait until next month to tell you what show it is exactly, we can tell you that we will be welcoming a new face to the Snark Lady line-up. In addition to being a long time reader and active commenter, she’s the queen of snappy one-liners, is not afraid to call BS when she sees it and probably likes at least 1 character you hate. Everyone welcome and (if we flatter ourselves a little) (a lot) congratulate Stephanie! Check out her Twitter or click here and be jelly of her gorgeous illustrations. We’re super excited she agreed to do this with us and probably would’ve cried had she said no.
ETA: We have also decided that we’re dedicated to driving ourselves completely insane by blogging all the things. While Gotham won the poll (and will be on the lineup) we’ve also decided to tackle How To Get Away With Murder, alongside Democracy Diva, Esquire – a recent law grad herself. The show premieres on Thursday, September 25th. We’ll see you there.
(We’re also planning #gameofsnark style livetweeting for the two new fall shows – make sure you’re following us on Twitter for all the details!)
Welcome Questionable New Friends:
This month we got a hit from someone searching, “apologetic stalker.” This isn’t really enough information to go on. I want to know, is this person the apologetic stalker? Do they have an apologetic stalker in their life? Either way, I’d like to go on record and say that the truly apologetic stalker would immediately stop being a stalker. You’re welcome, new friend!
♥
The Snark Squad
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
Nicole is the co-captain of Snark Squad and these days she spends most of her time editing podcasts. She spends too much time on Twitter and very occasionally vlogs and blogs. In her day job she's a producer, editor, director, and sometimes host of educational YouTube channels. She loves travel, maps, panda gifs, and semicolons. Writing biographies stresses her out; she crowd sourced this one years ago and has been using a version of it ever since. She would like to thank Twitter for their help.
