We start where we left off, with Hannah making her way through the crowd, looking for the shooter. She pulls out her gun, someone yells "gun," there is sudden, general chaos, Hanna fires at the window. Her bullet hits the window frame and the sniper is still able to fire his own bullet. Secret Service agents take Hannah down. Tom pushes Alex down to safety. He looks at her and notices that there is blood on her shirt. He tells her she's been shot, but the blood isn't hers. It's his. Tom looks at his shoulder and he's like, "oh shit."
New guardian means new credits! This time we're told that this guardian is wracked with fear and panic and they end up on a boat that might as well be the Titanic. (S: Meanwhile I overthink where a Titanic reference puts us in time.) So, you know, look away, look away!
We start at an old-timey looking news station for Lachrymose News, "where things keep happening until they stop happening." I know this "it keeps happening" feeling because it encapsulates all of my feelings about the current administration.
We start at an old-timey looking news station for Lachrymose News, "where things keep happening until they stop happening." I know this "it keeps happening" feeling because it encapsulates all of my feelings about the current administration.
We open to the car crash, where Agent Hannah Wells is either dead or unconscious. Some dude comes to check on her, and he seems really kind, talking to her all calmly and telling her not to move her neck. Then he strangles her. Um… what? Why spend all that time comforting her if he’s an assassin who’s supposed to kill her? Maybe the show thought using misdirection here would add tension, but it just ends up making this guy look like the most incompetent assassin ever. I bet I know where he buys his assassin-gear.
We begin at night, in some random office building. A middle-aged guy sits in his cubicle, looking around furtively as he copies something onto his laptop. Then we get an aerial shot of him sitting in a bathroom stall, opening said laptop with a screwdriver, and then removing a tiny storage chip from the hard drive inside it. Not sure that’s a thing, but let’s go with it. (S: The only way to survive SnarkTV, really.) He places the chip into a tricked-out quarter that opens to reveal a cavity that perfectly fits a tiny storage drive. Cool!
Credits, which now allude to the fact that the Baudelaires are with Dr. Montgomery. The song tells us up front that this adult is also going to be bad at adulting, so cool. On the bright side, I didn't know I could love these credits more, but they are CUSTOMIZED. I already know I want to rewatch all the credits once I finish the series and my memory is more fresh on what all the little tidbits are. (S: Agreed, this is a very exciting development.) (A: They were a little spoilery, but it brings me joy, so.)
Look away, look away, look away.
Didn't? Okay.
Samantha: This theme song gets stuck in my head in a big way.
Annie: This song has been keeping me up at night, stuck in my head.
Dani: As a child of the 80's, the "look away" lyrics just give me nasty Chicago 19 flashbacks.
Didn't? Okay.
Samantha: This theme song gets stuck in my head in a big way.
Annie: This song has been keeping me up at night, stuck in my head.
Dani: As a child of the 80's, the "look away" lyrics just give me nasty Chicago 19 flashbacks.
The title seems particularly apt know that we know 1) CBS did not renew BrainDead, and 2) a Twitter troll won the election.
Marines: And he keeps on trolling.
Dani: As always, we begin with our singing recapper — only this time he’s performing live for us, right next to the brownstone where Laurel, Rochelle, and Gustav are gathered. The show starts right where the last one left off, with Laurel telling the Scoobs that she knows what the space bugs want, and she knows how to stop them.
Marines: And he keeps on trolling.
Dani: As always, we begin with our singing recapper — only this time he’s performing live for us, right next to the brownstone where Laurel, Rochelle, and Gustav are gathered. The show starts right where the last one left off, with Laurel telling the Scoobs that she knows what the space bugs want, and she knows how to stop them.
I take full responsibility for getting us behind on this show. Between the December blues and life, this fell to the bottom of my list. The good news is that there are no new episodes until March so we have time to play catch up! Also, the still of this episode on the ABC app is Leo looking as whiny as Conor from Angel.
Dani: That alone would have derailed my motivation.
Marines: I already watched this episode but that description makes me wish I could unwatch it.
Dani: That alone would have derailed my motivation.
Marines: I already watched this episode but that description makes me wish I could unwatch it.
Our singing recapper (aka THE BEST THING EVER) (M: I'm gonna miss it so much) tells us what happened last week:
We begin with Luke telling Laurel about the bug briefing he got from Bob Isenstadt, the grandfatherly “Director’s Director” of the CIA. Laurel is rightfully suspicious, but Luke thinks she should be happy because this means she was right all along, and now the professionals will handle the crisis. He tells her she has to back off and let the CIA do their job.
We begin with Luke telling Laurel about the bug briefing he got from Bob Isenstadt, the grandfatherly “Director’s Director” of the CIA. Laurel is rightfully suspicious, but Luke thinks she should be happy because this means she was right all along, and now the professionals will handle the crisis. He tells her she has to back off and let the CIA do their job.
We pick up right where we left off, with the FBI examining Nassar's dead body. Atwood instructs some soldiers to bring him the names of anyone who handled his food, DNA, fingerprints and camera footage. Atwood then walks to Hannah and very shiftily comments that now no one knows the truth about Nassar. Hannah's like, "uh, we do...?" But they don't have proof. Hannah says they need to follow-up with the one lead they have: Catalan. Atwood is scared, though, because if they are the only two who know about Catalan, that means they'll be targeted next.
After the previouslies, we’re taken to a prison filled with heavily armed soldiers. An orange-clad prisoner, his limbs shackled and a black sack over his head, is escorted down many, many hallways in slow motion. Eventually the dude is put in a cell and the bag is removed from his head, but even then the cameraman is weirdly coy about showing us the prisoner’s face. We know from both the previouslies and the cheater-y newscaster voiceover that the prisoner is Majid Nassar, so the super-suspenseful music and dramatic buildup to reveal his face, like everything else on this show, makes zero sense. But, hey — at least it’s consistent!
The episode begins with Tom lying awake in bed at 5 am. He receives a phone call that it's time.
In the Oval, the Admiral is going over plans to bomb the compound where Nassar is. He assures Tom that they only hit what they target so a nearby village should be safe. Seth comes in because he was summoned, but only so that they don't tell him anything so that he's not lying to the press. Seth mentions that it would be weird if the President wasn't at the medal ceremony for the first responders, especially as there's no VP to fill in.
In the Oval, the Admiral is going over plans to bomb the compound where Nassar is. He assures Tom that they only hit what they target so a nearby village should be safe. Seth comes in because he was summoned, but only so that they don't tell him anything so that he's not lying to the press. Seth mentions that it would be weird if the President wasn't at the medal ceremony for the first responders, especially as there's no VP to fill in.
Telegraphed Middle Eastern Location. Things are dusty. A man runs up a narrow staircase into a dusty room where he grabs a laptop and a phone and uses them to securely connect. He nervously types as quickly as he can, as more men are now running up the narrow staircase. We see that part of Nervous Man's message is that Nassar's, the guy who sent America the IT WAS ME message last episode, location has been confirmed.
Our dear recapper just can’t even with this show anymore, so this week’s “previously on” song has him switching it up and giving us a recap of Gunsmoke.
I hear ya, recapper guy. Extremist alien-baby was tough to stomach.
Marines: Do we say that each new recap song is our favorite, because no really. THIS ONE is my favorite. 1- because of the way he starts off trying to recap in uncertain terms, 2- because I AM THAT STRESSED OUT TOO, 3- lol Gunsmoke, and 4- the doctor taking a pulse and shaking his head. Amazing.
I hear ya, recapper guy. Extremist alien-baby was tough to stomach.
Marines: Do we say that each new recap song is our favorite, because no really. THIS ONE is my favorite. 1- because of the way he starts off trying to recap in uncertain terms, 2- because I AM THAT STRESSED OUT TOO, 3- lol Gunsmoke, and 4- the doctor taking a pulse and shaking his head. Amazing.
Dani: We begin at the site of the Capitol explosion, where a survivor has been found in the rubble. Hannah (Maggie Q) rushes over, obviously hoping it’s the guy she’s been brooding over for the last two episodes, but it’s not. Poor Maggie Q. I wish the writers would give her something to do other than have reactions to stuff.
Samantha: It's unbelievable wasted potential. I should not keep forgetting that Maggie Q is in this show.
Samantha: It's unbelievable wasted potential. I should not keep forgetting that Maggie Q is in this show.
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