Regardless of what you were when you first watched this episode (book reader, spoiled show watcher, or unspoiled show watcher), I think we all sat down to this episode with the anxiety only the best content can create. It's episode 9, friends, also known as the episode that brought us the beheading of Ned Stark, the Battle of the Blackwater and now this.
Sweeney: I told Lor this already, but in our on-going game of, "Haha, see what shit the other can get stuck with!" -- usually played out on Fifty Shades, and occasionally Buffy -- this was probably the worst draw yet.
Previously: Angel broke into Wolfram & Hart to steal files that would rescue some kids, and The Powers That Be Contriving encouraged him to grab an ancient prophecy about himself...
Sweeney: This finale is a weird one because we had our showdown with the big bad in the last episode, and yet, here we are, with another episode to go. Whedon has a whole. freaking. lot. of megaweird crazypants foreshadowing to do, and that's probably a big part of why opinions are split on this episode. I'm stoked to experience it with the gift of hindsight for the first time. Granted, it makes for a hard episode to recap because of all the epic DAFUQery. Let's see how this works out for us.
Lorraine: As the resident know-nothing-er, this will be interesting for me as I know that it's full of foreshadowing but I still have no foresight. I'll be over here putting around the episode!
Lorraine: As the resident know-nothing-er, this will be interesting for me as I know that it's full of foreshadowing but I still have no foresight. I'll be over here putting around the episode!
Thank you so much for being patient with us this month, specifically in this last week or two. Settling back down into life post the Snark Lady trip to California has been rather tricky for me. Mostly, though, my RL job was basically all, "welcome back from a week of vacation. Here's everything you missed with interest." Hooray, gainful employment.
Sweeney: I still don't entirely know what's going on. Just when I thought I'd developed a solid understanding of how to manage a self-structured schedule, I went to Coachella and then had all sorts of family stuff (which seriously just. keeps. coming.)
Sweeney: I still don't entirely know what's going on. Just when I thought I'd developed a solid understanding of how to manage a self-structured schedule, I went to Coachella and then had all sorts of family stuff (which seriously just. keeps. coming.)
Sara: The PLLs are all at Spencer's house, where parents don't exist, talking about the note A sent to Aria's mother. I would much rather have seen A send a note about Aria dry humping her teacher. Does A have a request line?
Lorraine: Or perhaps she's hiring? CALL ME A! I have references!
Sweeney: Pages and pages of your qualifications for the job, in fact. She need only visit this blog for proof of all the training you've received.
Lorraine: Or perhaps she's hiring? CALL ME A! I have references!
Sweeney: Pages and pages of your qualifications for the job, in fact. She need only visit this blog for proof of all the training you've received.
Kirsti: We open in a dark street, where a shady looking guy is selling a couple of way-too-young-to-be-out-alone-after-dark kids some crappy looking toys. A young blind woman in a VERY unflattering outfit is walking down the street with a cane. (L: K, girl, she's blind.) The shady guy stops her so that he can move his crappy looking toys out of her way. This scene apparently serves almost no purpose because we seizure cut - LESS THAN A MINUTE IN - to Angel fighting some vampires.
Lorraine: I'm pretty sure the point of the scene was to bash us over the head with how completely blind this woman is.
Lorraine: I'm pretty sure the point of the scene was to bash us over the head with how completely blind this woman is.
We open at Crispydale High and Buffy searching for Riley. LOL, NICE TRY. He's hanging out in Adam's cave, being called 'brother' and being given a pep talk. "What have you done to me?" Riley asks, and Adam replies that the Evil Bitch Monster [Professor Walsh] gave Riley a behavioural modification chip, just like Spike's. Except that instead of being in his brain, it's in his chest and is tied into his central nervous system. LOL, OKAY SHOW. WHATEVER.
Sweeney: Since I've already ranked this episode really high on the strength of, quite frankly, one scene, I feel obligated to make it clear how much bullshit I am willing to put up with for certain things. Epic bullshit break #1!
Sweeney: Since I've already ranked this episode really high on the strength of, quite frankly, one scene, I feel obligated to make it clear how much bullshit I am willing to put up with for certain things. Epic bullshit break #1!
Sweeney and I have developed a sort of unofficial game when it comes to handing off chapters. Mostly it involves pointing and laughing at whatever atrocities the other person has to endure. I mean, we're totally friends and everything, but you can't deny the little bit of satisfaction that comes when your chapter fades on sex and you think, "YES. I AM SPARED." That all said, Sweeney is currently winning this game because her chapter ended riiight before our two main idiots decide to head back into the Red Womb of Domestic Violence.
Considering that we could barely get the other posts up last week, I assume nobody was surprised that we decided to skip this. This week we are supposedly discussing music,...
If fighting in a cemetery is Buffy's go-to opening (with dream sequences being a not-too-far second place) a woman worriedly walking down a street at night is Angel's go-to. That's how we start our episode today. Worried Walking Woman is being followed by three nefarious looking guys and she soon breaks out into a worried jog. She reaches a dead end, and we see the nefarious guys are in fact vampires. She looks pretty SOL until we hear footsteps approaching. One vamp is all, "YOU!" and the music swells and the lying camera zooms in on the YOU!'s feet, so we know it isn't who we expect it to be, despite the black and billowy coat. It is not Angel. It's a black male wearing a bandana. He asks if the vamp was expecting someone else, just as a jeep full of back-up rolls into the shot.
Roll credits.
Roll credits.
We've complained plenty about season four. I mean, nitpicking is what we're all about, because it's funny, but season 4 has been tough to get through so I know the straight complaining may have increased lately. That all said, I can't believe that we're in fact almost done with the season. Someone mentioned in the comments a bit ago that we've passed the half way point for the entire series. CRAZY, YOU GUYS.
Sweeney: Halfway. As in, like, we'll finish it one day? Does not compute. O_o
Lor: I KNOW.
Sweeney: Halfway. As in, like, we'll finish it one day? Does not compute. O_o
Lor: I KNOW.
Hanna is in lots of trouble with her mom partly for wrecking her boyfriend's car, but mostly for the fact that there are cops at her house again and she can't sex her way out of this one for Hanna. Poor Mama Marin. It seems like this is the first time she found a problem her vagina couldn't solve.
The PLL's are talking about the exciting new memorial bench the town is putting in and the flowers they'll plant and BFF tiles they will all make for Alison. Hanna still has Alison's bracelet and she is not happy about it. The other girls hesitate, but Spencer takes it and tells the girls to grow the fuck up.
The PLL's are talking about the exciting new memorial bench the town is putting in and the flowers they'll plant and BFF tiles they will all make for Alison. Hanna still has Alison's bracelet and she is not happy about it. The other girls hesitate, but Spencer takes it and tells the girls to grow the fuck up.
The episode begins more or less right after the last, as it's a two-parter. Angel is returning to the Brooding Basement with a very beat up Faith. He gives her a towel and puts her to bed. She says nothing until he starts to walk away. She says his name and we see her beating him up, but it was just in her head. He asks her what she wants. "Nothing," she says. Roll electric cellos.
Lorraine: Dude, if she has those murdery scenes playing in her head all the time, it's a wonder she doesn't kill more people.
K: A+
Lorraine: Dude, if she has those murdery scenes playing in her head all the time, it's a wonder she doesn't kill more people.
K: A+
It's necessary to warn everyone that this is a get-the-tissues-ready episode.
Lorraine: I was gonna put it on here if you didn't. Team Feels unanimously agrees.
K: Damn. We missed a prime episode to vote the last episode V for Vomit-worthy. Also, Team Heartless Cow agrees that this episode is full of feels. Brace yourselves.
Sweeney: The episode begins with Tara and Willow being adorable.
Lorraine: I was gonna put it on here if you didn't. Team Feels unanimously agrees.
K: Damn. We missed a prime episode to vote the last episode V for Vomit-worthy. Also, Team Heartless Cow agrees that this episode is full of feels. Brace yourselves.
Sweeney: The episode begins with Tara and Willow being adorable.
The lying liar title credits give us King’s Landing, Harrenhal, Riverrun, Winterfellstillonfire, The Wall, and Yunkai.
We start with our favorite direboss waking up and deciding to smash a sleeping Hound’s head in with a large stone. He tells her that if she fails to kill him, he’ll break both of her hands. Later, they’re riding on a horse, and he’s trying to insist that men far worse than him would have found her. When he mentions that he’s saved her sister, Arya’s interest piques, as does my feels, with this additional mention of how long the Starks have been separated and HOW THEY’LL NEVER HAVE A COMPLETE REUNION. But! The Hound has decided to facilitate that because Robb and Cat will probs pay him for her safe return.
We start with our favorite direboss waking up and deciding to smash a sleeping Hound’s head in with a large stone. He tells her that if she fails to kill him, he’ll break both of her hands. Later, they’re riding on a horse, and he’s trying to insist that men far worse than him would have found her. When he mentions that he’s saved her sister, Arya’s interest piques, as does my feels, with this additional mention of how long the Starks have been separated and HOW THEY’LL NEVER HAVE A COMPLETE REUNION. But! The Hound has decided to facilitate that because Robb and Cat will probs pay him for her safe return.
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