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Category: TV

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Doctor Who S04 E12 – #squadgoals

  • Posted byby K
  • August 3, 2016
  • 11 Comments
The TARDIS lands, and the Doctor rushes out in a panic into suburban London, Donna behind him. He's surprised to see that everything's perfectly normal. Donna's too busy being all, "so that was Rose Tyler, huh?" (M: Kinda fair given all the Doctor's moping over her...) The Doctor says that if Rose is back, it means the walls between parallel universes are breaking down, and they'll take all the dimensions down with them. He rushes back into the TARDIS. Across the street from the TARDIS, a milk van starts to shake, and the tiles fall off a house roof. The milkman stares up at the sky in shock.
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The OC S04 E08 – Pizza Prostitution

  • Posted byby Catherine
  • August 3, 2016
  • 3 Comments
Seth and Ryan are at a gas station while Seth is simultaneously washing bugs off his windshield and being interrogated by Ryan.
Ryan is asking what's going on and Seth snarks that it's New Year's Eve and they're on their way to Las Vegas. Ryan's all like, "I know," but I'm like silly Ryan, that wasn't for you! That was for us, your loyal viewers. Good exposition, show!
Apparently what Ryan was really asking was why the girls are acting so strange. Seth kinda verbally shrugs and Ryan says he thinks that he's lying.
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Supergirl S01 E15 – Cute little robot guy.

  • Posted byby Samantha
  • August 2, 2016
  • 6 Comments
We open this episode in the Phantom Zone, 13 years ago. Child Kara is sleeping in her pod when it starts to shake and jerk around. Child Kara makes some interesting acting choices and it passes through a space arch metal thing. I think it's supposed to be ominous. Also, Kara was asleep for the entirety of her stay in the pod right? Since it was years?
Catherine: I guess not? She was supposed to be in stasis. I guess it's like that thing where you wake up but realize you still have a couple more hours to sleep and roll over in your spaceship. 
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The OC S04 E07 – Chrismu-COMA.

  • Posted byby Marines
  • August 1, 2016
  • 5 Comments
Alright, guys. I feel like we're in the home stretch here and I'm going to try and crank out these last 9 recaps as quickly as possible because it's time. It's time to finish The OC and say goodbye.
So, here we go.
Ryan is in the kitchen enjoying his morning coffee, when Kirsten comes in and tries to casually ask if he's going to invite anyone to Christmas Eve dinner. Ryan isn't sure because if he invites Taylor, that seems pretty serious. Kirsten lightly laughs at him and says they make their own rules at Christmukkah.
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Doctor Who S04 E11 – Past and Future Feelings

  • Posted byby K
  • July 31, 2016
  • 5 Comments
Future, at an unidentified Asian locale. (K: Hooray! Not!White places are always exciting to me.) Donna and the Doctor are walking through a market and generally being so damn happy and adorable that it hurts me. We know that the Doctor has all of these adventures with his companions and we, as the audience, seem to stop in on them when things go wrong. They reference, though, and there is this sense that there are other, generally "normal" adventures. I know everything is about to go to shit in one moment, but this brief moment of pure travel adventure gave me feelings.
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The OC S04 E06 – Pretty Little OC

  • Posted byby Ryan
  • July 30, 2016
  • 1 Comment
The last OC episode I recapped for Snark Squad had a lot of future Twilight actors and according to IMDB, this episode has a mini Pretty Little Liars get-together. Crossover magic is a thing I attract, apparently.
We open to Ryan staring at a fantasy of Taylor sexily dancing on the Cohen's kitchen counter with some very big hair.
We go to Ryan's POV and see Sandy offering him pre-smeared bagels, which he vacantly accepts. Ryan asks about Seth who appears to announce he's leaving for Rhode Island. Again.
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The OC S04 E05 – Shut up and give me Pancakes

  • Posted byby Annie
  • July 19, 2016
  • 3 Comments
Ahhhh! I am so excited to be recapping this episode because it introduces my favourite OC character EVER. I'm so excited.
SO EXCITED. Okay. Let's get to it.
We open at Casa Cohen, Ryan is trying to battle his insomnia by watching Bollywood films. Seth joins him, and whines a bit, but then promises to stay up with him in solidarity. Cue montage of Seth sleeping on the couch next to Ryan while he stays up all night. Kirsten find Seth asleep on the couch the next morning and wakes him up.
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Dawson’s Creek S04 E06 – This is a terrible idea.

  • Posted byby K
  • July 15, 2016
  • 1 Comment
Capeside High library. Andie tells Jen that she knows applying for college is overwhelming, and suggests she start by looking at schools in New York, seeing as she lived there before and has been talking about going back. Jen's all "I've been saying WHAT?" Yeah, turns out Drue's been spreading rumours again. Asshole.
"'According to him' would be the key phrase. He's the Dark Prince of Revisionist History..." Jen snaps. Best. Jack rushes in, totally out of breath. Andie asks what's going on and he totally downplays it, being all "Oh, you got something in post. Totally not a big deal.
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Pretty Little Liars S05 E12 – Thanksgiving murder

  • Posted byby Marines
  • July 14, 2016
  • 3 Comments
It's Thanksgiving Day and Aria, Hanna and Emily are sadly standing outside of a house. There are police cars everywhere and some police tape is blocking off the entrance to the house. Ezra is there too, but I try to ignore him as much as possible.
Jessica: A good piece of advice for all of us.
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Game of Thrones S06 E09 – It’s basically Woodstock.

Ladies and gentlemen, you could've been anywhere in the world tonight, but you're here with us in Winterfell. Are you ready for a BastardBowl?
Catherine: Get hype! We're probably gonna be in tears before this is over. 
Diva: We're probably gonna be in tears before this starts.
The previouslies remind us that the battle for Winterfell is imminent, Shireen Baratheon loved the toy stag that Davos gave her (see - I'm already crying!), the Greyjoys are en route to Meereen, and the slavers are trying to blow up Dany's pyramid just as she deboards her dragon.
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Dawson’s Creek S04 E05 – It’s Always All About Sex

  • Posted byby Chelsea
  • July 8, 2016
  • 6 Comments
Hello, Snarkers of the internet. I am so, so happy to be revisiting my absolute favorite show of the 90’s. My love for Joshua Jackson runs, to this day, as deep as it  ever has. As does my hatred of Katie Holmes' acting abilities.
Kirsti: Shocker that the rest of the main quartet are now famous for their acting abilities while she's famous for having been married to a lunatic.
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The OC S04 E04 – Suck it, Starlord

  • Posted byby Reem
  • July 7, 2016
  • 5 Comments
Hello! I am so very excited and honored to be writing for Snark Squad! Seriously thank you, Mari for letting me do this. And now I am so sorry for the endless parade of stupid you're all about to read. Blame it on my youth y'all! Also blame it on the fact that I have never seen the OC ever in my life. When the OC was in its prime, I was still singing along happily to Hannah Montana. (M: That makes me feel a wee bit old, in that strange, almost 30 kind of way...)(R: You're not old! I'm young!) On with the recap!
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Supernatural S05 E22 – I’m your density!

  • Posted byby K
  • July 6, 2016
  • 22 Comments
CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!! (S: THERE'LL BE PEACE WHEN YOU ARE DOOONE.)
That's right, friends. It's the final episode of the season, and that means it's time for the previouslies to take us right back to the beginning and remind us of all the major plot points from the past five seasons that may prove relevant here. But mostly it means a full minute of jamming to Kansas because I have not so secretly terrible taste in music.
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Game of Thrones S06 E08 – Milk toast

The previouslies show Tommen agreeing to be in the Cult Miltant, Cersei telling Jaime that he doesn't need to stick around because she's gonna have a trial by combat and she's already got a FrankenMountain for that, The Blackfish sassing Jaime, Sexy Septon getting killed and the Hound getting angry, and Arya getting stabbed a bunch.
Credits take us through King's Landing, Riverrun (woooo!), Winterfaux, Braavos and Meereen.
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Game of Thrones S06 E07 – Long Live Princess Bearboss

Thanks for your patience, Snark Nation! Mari is traveling around the world, recruiting soldiers for the Great War to come, so Catherine and I are going to finish this season up on our own and probably hold each other while we sob. Right? Right.
Catherine: It's so likely that I'm upgrading it from a probably to a definitely. Get ready to emotionally suffer!