It's finally here!! The episode that every Dawson's Creek viewer - casual or devoted - remembers from season 1. NGL, I *may* have bribed Diva to let me do the first recap solely so that this episode fell to me...
Democracy Diva: And I may have agreed begrudgingly because THIS EPISODE, YOU GUYS. IT IS THE BEST/WORST/EVERYTHING-EST.
We open in Havana, Cuba. Funnily enough, it looks a lot like Neptune, except with horses. Duncan is spending some time there to grow an ugly beard hide out for awhile.
Lorraine: That beard definitely looks like it's trying too hard.
Diva: Keith has managed to track him down, while wearing a hat that makes me fully unable to take him seriously. Duncan wants to know if Keith also thinks he's a murderer. He tells Duncan that he doesn't know who killed Lilly, but he knows it wasn't Abel Koontz. Duncan is all, yeah, but it also wasn't ME, so let me grow my chin-pubes in peace
Lorraine: That beard definitely looks like it's trying too hard.
Diva: Keith has managed to track him down, while wearing a hat that makes me fully unable to take him seriously. Duncan wants to know if Keith also thinks he's a murderer. He tells Duncan that he doesn't know who killed Lilly, but he knows it wasn't Abel Koontz. Duncan is all, yeah, but it also wasn't ME, so let me grow my chin-pubes in peace
Joss Whedon got his feature length film, and we're going to recap it, but fair warning that this post will be long.
The Universal Pictures logo becomes Earth. A voice over gives us the set-up, but it is not Mal, as we were accustomed to. It's a woman (S: Tamara Taylor from Bones!) with a slightly different version of events: Earth-That-Was could no longer sustain the ever growing population. People found a new solar system, terraformed the planets and moons to form new Earths. The central planets formed the Alliance. The savage, outer planets refused Alliance control, resulting in a devastating war. But the Alliance won and now everyone is happy!
The Universal Pictures logo becomes Earth. A voice over gives us the set-up, but it is not Mal, as we were accustomed to. It's a woman (S: Tamara Taylor from Bones!) with a slightly different version of events: Earth-That-Was could no longer sustain the ever growing population. People found a new solar system, terraformed the planets and moons to form new Earths. The central planets formed the Alliance. The savage, outer planets refused Alliance control, resulting in a devastating war. But the Alliance won and now everyone is happy!
Pushing the Limits by Katie McGarry Release Date: 1 August 2012 Source: Purchased Order: Amazon || Powell’s In a nutshell: Two messed up teenagers – one a foster kid trying to...
I both cannot believe it's been a year and feel like I've been waiting for this forever. Welcome back, dear friends and comrades in misery! It's time for Game of Thrones, season four.
We open with an extended previously sequence that is much better than what I was able to come up with at the start of this post, but does boil down to a lot of death and bad luck. I mean, I counted: they showed us 8 outright deaths plus the Unsullied attacking a whole bunch of people. The last thing we see is the bloodied sword used to chop Ned Stark's head off. It is because of these previouslies that I realize that Ned was beheaded by his own sword. It's like retroactive trauma. NO SERIOUSLY. WELCOME BACK!
Sweeney: I don't think I could handle watching this show without you guys. I need this weekly therapy session to process all my emotions.
We open with an extended previously sequence that is much better than what I was able to come up with at the start of this post, but does boil down to a lot of death and bad luck. I mean, I counted: they showed us 8 outright deaths plus the Unsullied attacking a whole bunch of people. The last thing we see is the bloodied sword used to chop Ned Stark's head off. It is because of these previouslies that I realize that Ned was beheaded by his own sword. It's like retroactive trauma. NO SERIOUSLY. WELCOME BACK!
Sweeney: I don't think I could handle watching this show without you guys. I need this weekly therapy session to process all my emotions.
After some previouslies, we start at the Roosevelt Asylum in Rockford, Illinois, which sounds like exactly the place I never want to be. (The asylum part, not the Illinois part.) The creepy cameraman shows some anonymous hands (A?!) cutting through a chain on the door and sneaking in.
Cut to outside, and two cops are pulling up outside of the asylum. One of the cops says that they can't seem to keep kids out of this place and the other cop asks what it is. Exposity Cop is like, "Oh, I forgot you're new in town and don't know the plot of this episode, so let me fill you and the viewers in real quick about the legend of this asylum." Supposedly the asylum is haunted with the ghosts of the patients, and if you spend the night, they'll drive you insane. That's cool and all, but I'm pretty sure the majority of what's happening in that place (if it's anything like my small Louisiana town) is lots of pot smoking and sex.
Cut to outside, and two cops are pulling up outside of the asylum. One of the cops says that they can't seem to keep kids out of this place and the other cop asks what it is. Exposity Cop is like, "Oh, I forgot you're new in town and don't know the plot of this episode, so let me fill you and the viewers in real quick about the legend of this asylum." Supposedly the asylum is haunted with the ghosts of the patients, and if you spend the night, they'll drive you insane. That's cool and all, but I'm pretty sure the majority of what's happening in that place (if it's anything like my small Louisiana town) is lots of pot smoking and sex.
Construction Zone. Some construction guys are building new, ritzy houses in a classy subdivision. Beardy Construction Guy complains about mosquitoes right as another guy falls through a weird hole and breaks his ankle. As Beardy Construction Guy runs to get a rope to pull him out, the guy in the hole gets COVERED in bugs, and this is like the third Supernatural recap I've gotten that involves something that legitimately terrifies me. UGH. By the time Beardy Construction Guy gets back, the guy in the hole is laying at the bottom (with no bugs on him) and bleeding from the eyes, nose, and ears.
Kirsti: Hello, nightmare.
Kirsti: Hello, nightmare.
St. Louis, MO. We open this episode with a girl tied to a chair and covered in blood. A man is in the room with her, holding a knife. Cops enter the house and follow the blood stains to find the girl still alive. As they untie her, the girl motions to the room behind them and the cops find the guy standing at the door, with the bloody knife still in his hand. They instruct him to turn around, and when he does, it's Dean.
Kirsti: The entire thing is done to the strains of Iron Butterfly's In-a-Gadda-da-Vida, which would probably be a lot spookier if it didn't immediately conjure up memories of Bart Simpson selling his soul to Milhouse for $5...
Kirsti: The entire thing is done to the strains of Iron Butterfly's In-a-Gadda-da-Vida, which would probably be a lot spookier if it didn't immediately conjure up memories of Bart Simpson selling his soul to Milhouse for $5...
Gina Torres gushes about how wonderful the gross warehouse is while Connor - still covered in blood - and Angel fawn over her. She kneels next to a comatose Cordy and thanks her for having her free will taken away so that she could exist protecting her. She tells her to be at peace, then gushes some more about how perfect everything is. There's one thing that's not perfect, Angel interjects. And that's the fact that he came there to kill her. He hands her his sword and says that he deserves to be punished. She takes it and says that she can feel his suffering, but that the suffering ends now. He drops his head, bracing himself for the blow, but it never comes. He looks up to find her gone. Cue Electric Cellos.
After the credits, Fred's scurrying around the office, cleaning up fallen books as Lorne watches and sips a cocktail because he's the only sane character in this show. He tells her to stop because she's making him twitchy.
After the credits, Fred's scurrying around the office, cleaning up fallen books as Lorne watches and sips a cocktail because he's the only sane character in this show. He tells her to stop because she's making him twitchy.
I was pretty devastated when I discovered that I had to cover this episode, because - as you guys should know by now - I have eyeball phobia. The unfortunate thing is that I only have myself to blame for this - way back in the day, I was all "YAAAAAAY SPIKE!!!!" and insisted on the Sweeney, Lor, Kirsti recapping order because it meant that I could cover School Hard. Oh, Past Kirsti. You stupid, stupid girl.
Sweeney: To be fair, that was actually just the logical order based on when I joined the recaps -- it's more that you were excited about the way it worked out than that you actually moved for it to be that way. You know, for whatever consolation that affords you.
Sweeney: To be fair, that was actually just the logical order based on when I joined the recaps -- it's more that you were excited about the way it worked out than that you actually moved for it to be that way. You know, for whatever consolation that affords you.
We open at an airport where some guy is looking super anxious. He heads to the bathroom and is splashing water on his face, and a random other guy says not to worry because your odds of dying in a plane crash are 20,000 to 1. YEAH, NOT WHAT I WANNA HEAR, MAN. Let me just go ahead and tell you that flying is my absolute biggest fear and the majority of my nightmares center around plane crashes, so I'm pretty sure this episode is going to ruin me.
Kirsti: I'm not afraid of flying on account of I've been doing it on the regular since I was like nine months old (also because I live in Australia and it's really fucking time consuming to get ANYWHERE if you don't fly), but bathroom guy is a total asshat for listing that hugely unhelpful statistic.
Kirsti: I'm not afraid of flying on account of I've been doing it on the regular since I was like nine months old (also because I live in Australia and it's really fucking time consuming to get ANYWHERE if you don't fly), but bathroom guy is a total asshat for listing that hugely unhelpful statistic.
We open in the kitchen / common area, where Inara & Kaylee are playing a game, Simon is trying to get River to eat something, and Jayne is sitting off by himself. Simon tries to convince River that the food is good, but Jayne says it smells like crotch, which is the funniest description I've ever heard. Zoe and Wash enter, playfully arguing about taking a vacation. Wash wants to take a vacation on Ariel, but Zoe knows that Ariel is a hot spot for the Feds.
Wash begs someone to help him convince Zoe, and Inara chimes in that Ariel is a beautiful planet with lots of romantic things to do. Even Simon helps try to sell it, and Wash eagerly bounces up and down and it's the cutest. Zoe is adamant, though: "I don't care if it's got sunsets 24 hours a day, I ain't settin' foot on that planet." Mal enternounces that ain't nobody settin' foot on that planet.
Wash begs someone to help him convince Zoe, and Inara chimes in that Ariel is a beautiful planet with lots of romantic things to do. Even Simon helps try to sell it, and Wash eagerly bounces up and down and it's the cutest. Zoe is adamant, though: "I don't care if it's got sunsets 24 hours a day, I ain't settin' foot on that planet." Mal enternounces that ain't nobody settin' foot on that planet.
This is my second episode this season and it is again an episode a few of you have claimed to love. We know how well that worked out for me and Beneath You. Here's hoping I can love this one. The previouslies are Anya heavy, which is a good sign.
Sweeney: No pressure or anything, Anya, but our happiness for the week rests on you.
Lor: We open at Chez Summers, where Dawn is helping Willow arrange some things while giving her advice that consists of, "do what everyone else does," "nod and smile," and generally, "fake it 'till you make it." "Do what everyone else does," seems like a good way to get dead in Sunnydale, even if we are just talking about Willow going back to college.
Sweeney: No pressure or anything, Anya, but our happiness for the week rests on you.
Lor: We open at Chez Summers, where Dawn is helping Willow arrange some things while giving her advice that consists of, "do what everyone else does," "nod and smile," and generally, "fake it 'till you make it." "Do what everyone else does," seems like a good way to get dead in Sunnydale, even if we are just talking about Willow going back to college.
Blackwater Ridge. Lost Creek, Colorado. Something is growling outside of a tent in the middle of the woods. Three guys inside are playing video games on handheld devices, and HEY. One of them is Cory Monteith! Aw, feels.
Kirsti: Especially seeing as this was one of his few chances to play an age appropriate character. Sniff, tear, sob.
Sara: Another guy is recording a message on his phone for someone named Haley, telling her that he's fine and will talk to her tomorrow. Probably not if that growly thing has anything to say about it. Also, that's some sweet cell service!
Kirsti: Especially seeing as this was one of his few chances to play an age appropriate character. Sniff, tear, sob.
Sara: Another guy is recording a message on his phone for someone named Haley, telling her that he's fine and will talk to her tomorrow. Probably not if that growly thing has anything to say about it. Also, that's some sweet cell service!
What's that? You've been wanting us to cover Supernatural? You ask, we deliver. This one's going to be a little different, because Sweeney is firmly on the Nope Train as far as Supernatural is concerned, and Lor's got enough on her plate. So y'all are stuck with Sara and me instead. SORRY NOT SORRY.
Sara: SO NOT SORRY BECAUSE: CUTE BOYS AND MONSTERS.
K: Truth. I've been a salt gunner from day one, although I must admit that I took a little break somewhere around season 6 when things got really shitty. But I marathonned my way through season 6, season 7 and season 8 earlier this year, and was firmly back on board in time for season 9.
Sara: SO NOT SORRY BECAUSE: CUTE BOYS AND MONSTERS.
K: Truth. I've been a salt gunner from day one, although I must admit that I took a little break somewhere around season 6 when things got really shitty. But I marathonned my way through season 6, season 7 and season 8 earlier this year, and was firmly back on board in time for season 9.