Everything is usually so shiny and bright when a new season starts! I'll admit that I'm more hesitant than normal this time 'round because season four started off on such a prolonged, sour note. However, I still got pretty damn giddy when the credits music started. Here we are again, friends! Ready or not.
Democracy Diva: READY. So ready. I may have been running around my apartment singing the GoT theme song to myself in preparation. Also, hi, Traumateers! I'm so excited to be joining the GoT recaps.
First of all, thanks to the Snark Ladies for adding me to the Orphan Black recapping team. I started watching this show since you recommended it and am now thoroughly pulled in. Also, I am soooo excited for this episode. I've been watching the trailer and I'm curious to see how much having the male clones in the mix will change the game and change the consequences of the world.
Ok. Deep breath. Here we go.
Ok. Deep breath. Here we go.
It’s a stormy night in Gotham. (M: WHAT?! It's usually so bright and cheery.) A random guy with white hair arrives home to his Generic Gotham Apartment and grumbles about the wind blowing through an open window. He goes to shut it, but two guys in hoodies appear and grab him as he screams in terror.
Fish wakes up on the floor in some kind of prison, dashing my hopes that her leaving Gotham the city for a while also meant she would be leaving Gotham the show. Sigh. She asks the friendly-looking guy nearby if she’s dreaming, and he replies that he hopes so. Two scary-looking thugs saunter over, chuckling to themselves.
Fish wakes up on the floor in some kind of prison, dashing my hopes that her leaving Gotham the city for a while also meant she would be leaving Gotham the show. Sigh. She asks the friendly-looking guy nearby if she’s dreaming, and he replies that he hopes so. Two scary-looking thugs saunter over, chuckling to themselves.
It's another night at the hippest place in SF, P^3. There's a heat wave and Phoebe's so hot, she's rubbing ice all over her body and attracting the male patrons. Piper shoos the onlookers off and notes that Phoebe’s burning up. Phoebe says she doesn't feel sick, she feels hot and aroused. Nope. I don't want this episode.
Marines: Meanwhile, after I saw that opening? I did a little NOT MINE! dance.
Marines: Meanwhile, after I saw that opening? I did a little NOT MINE! dance.
The finale kicks us off right where we left off, feeling solidly sick to our stomachs as Aaron Echolls leaves the courthouse a free man with adoring fans. Veronica Voice Over sums it up for us: "So this is how it is: the innocent suffer, the guilty go free, and truth and fiction are pretty much interchangeable. There is neither a Santa Clause, nor an Easter Bunny, and there are no angels watching over us. Things just happen for no reason and nothing makes any sense."
After Aaron finishes smarming it up for the cameras, we cut to Mars Investigations where Keith takes the newspaper away from a very upset Veronica, telling her that however unjust things are, they cannot allow themselves to wallow in it.
After Aaron finishes smarming it up for the cameras, we cut to Mars Investigations where Keith takes the newspaper away from a very upset Veronica, telling her that however unjust things are, they cannot allow themselves to wallow in it.
Previously: Dean ended up in his fantasy world after being captured by a djinn. — All Hell Breaks Loose Part 1 Kirsti: Carry on my wayword soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooon!! That’s right, friends. It’s...
In the previouslies, we're treated to a bunch of clips of Mary and Jessica to let us know that this episode is going to be suuuuuuper fun. When we're done with previouslies, Dean's in the Bromobile, which now has new plates. Because that TOTALLY makes it less obvious. Sam phones to say that there's a cop car outside their motel. He heaves a sigh of relief when it leaves. Sam asks if Dean's got anything, but LOL NOPE because Sam's got him searching a massive area. Sam - books and Filofax of Shadows open to relevant entries - reveals that they're hunting a djinn. Dean gushes about how hot Barbara Eden was, and Sam eyerolls before saying that djinns like to hole up in ruins.
Shrine O'Spielberg. The whole gang is there, hanging out together, and it makes me really happy. Until Dawson says the same thing, and then I get upset that me and Dawson had a mind-meld. (K: Legit.) Anyway, Pacey calls them a clique and they're all, DUDE, NO. Jen helpfully informs the audience that she's now living at the Leerys' house, since Grams kicked her out. Pacey insists that they're one step away from the Peach Pit. Then everyone attacks Pacey with pillows until SO MANY FEATHERS start flying all over the room.
Like, that is way too many feathers for any of these pillows to still appear intact, which they do. My headcanon says the ghost of Abby Morgan is hiding in the ceiling, dumping feathers on all these idiots.
Like, that is way too many feathers for any of these pillows to still appear intact, which they do. My headcanon says the ghost of Abby Morgan is hiding in the ceiling, dumping feathers on all these idiots.
In what I thought was a flashback but is definitely a dream, Veronica envisions herself on the bus, with the bus crash victims. She's crying, and there's a girl in a tee shirt that says "I <3 DICK," so, um, yeah. I have absolutely no idea what's going on, and that's a feeling that will continue throughout this episode. Back in reality, someone wakes Veronica up and sends her to the school counselor. Veronica defends her bad behavior to the guidance counselor (namely, wearing headphones and sleeping in class, ripping down other students' posters, etc.) and jokes that she's being haunted by the bus crash victims. Except she's really not joking - she's seeing them every time she tries to fall asleep.
We open, predictably, in the Shrine o' Spielberg. Joey's crying her way through the first cut of Dawson's autobiographical shitfest. As it finishes, he asks for her opinion. "In my whole life, I've never been so unequivocally moved by words and moving images on screen!" she says before continuing that this movie will change people's lives. Dawson's thrilled. Joey says that there's no doubt that Jack McPhee will be one of the great filmmakers of our generation. Dawson's all "Skrrrrt, WHAT". He grabs the tape from the VCR and finds that it says it was directed by Jack.
He's confused. Jack climbs in the window, and he and Joey gush over each other for a minute before Jack says that he bumped into Spielberg and has been offered a job.
He's confused. Jack climbs in the window, and he and Joey gush over each other for a minute before Jack says that he bumped into Spielberg and has been offered a job.
Prue and Phoebe are going through old pictures and Phoebe is complaining about a lack of HER in all of them. Prue finds a couple of Baby Phoebe, including one with their mom. Phoebe catches some feels but before they can explore them too much, Piper rushes in looking for pen and paper. There's a knock on the door and on the way there, Piper exposits to her sisters that every year this man shows up on the same day with flowers for their grandmother from a secret admirer, when clearly he's the admirer.
Piper opens the door and it's Blatant Admirer with flowers for "Penny Halliwell."
Piper opens the door and it's Blatant Admirer with flowers for "Penny Halliwell."
Psychiatrist's office. A creepy guy in his early 20s tells the psychiatrist that a year or so ago, he started getting migraines. Then he found out he could electrocute things with his brain. He tried it out on the neighbour's cat. The psychiatrist frowns and makes notes that probably say "DO NOT SHAKE HANDS WITH THIS DUDE OMG." Electro-creeper says that he didn't want to kill the neighbour's cat, but the yellow-eyed man comes to him in his dreams and asks him to do things, that he has plans for him. Cut to Electro-creeper walking towards his car at night. When he reaches his car, there's a dark figure reflected in the window. Electro-creeper turns and promptly gets stabbed twice.
FLAME ON!
FLAME ON!
Dean pulls out a gun and walks into a room where a young blond guy is tied to a chair. The guy pleads for his life as a nurse and a tough looking guy suggest that maybe this isn't the best idea ever. Dean cocks his gun and says he has no choice. Blond Guy cries that it's not in him, but Dean has no fucks to give.
He shoots twice. The screen flashes white and fades into Sam lying on the floor of a motel. He sits up, panting, as Dean rushes to his side.
FLAME ON!
He shoots twice. The screen flashes white and fades into Sam lying on the floor of a motel. He sits up, panting, as Dean rushes to his side.
FLAME ON!
The Halliwell Manor shakes. The P's come running down the stairs and Phoebe helpfully announces, "oh no! Not another after shock!" Thanks, Phoebe. I was almost there but now I really know what's going on! Phoebs says Prue is the only who who likes earthquakes.
The girls are tidying up in the kitchen when Prue gets a whiff of something foul. Piper has already smelled this smell and thinks it's coming from the basement. She called someone to check it out, all without ever discussing this with her sisters because exposition needed to happen now. In fact, the gasman has just arrived.
Prue freaks out because they are hosting some auction-house-related dinner at the Manor. Phoebe assures her that everything will be okay.
The girls are tidying up in the kitchen when Prue gets a whiff of something foul. Piper has already smelled this smell and thinks it's coming from the basement. She called someone to check it out, all without ever discussing this with her sisters because exposition needed to happen now. In fact, the gasman has just arrived.
Prue freaks out because they are hosting some auction-house-related dinner at the Manor. Phoebe assures her that everything will be okay.
A police station in Baltimore. A detective grabs a fax off the machine, reads it, and tells the person he's talking to that he'll call them back. Cut to a SWAT team at the Motel of the Week. Cut back to Detective Cheap Suit [DCS] talking to a suspect in an interrogation room. He thought the suspect had just upped his game on the petty stuff, then they got a fax from St. Louis about Mystery Suspect killing someone. "So now we know Karen Giles wasn't the first person you murdered," he says. He pronouces Giles as Guylz, and I want to punch him in the face.
Across town, LINDA FREAKING BLAIR (better known as Regan from The Exorcist) and the SWAT team break down a motel room door. "Going somewhere, Sam?" she says.
Across town, LINDA FREAKING BLAIR (better known as Regan from The Exorcist) and the SWAT team break down a motel room door. "Going somewhere, Sam?" she says.