What's this? A TMYK post? MADNESS. Right, so, for those of you who are new around here, this is a thing we used to do but randomly stopped doing for no reason other than time/laziness a few months ago.
Lorraine: I'm gonna go ahead and defend us and say it was more a time issue. No one who reads this site can accuse us of being lazy. I mean, we are sometimes, but you guys wouldn't know it.
Sweeney: That's totally true. I was doing the whole self-deprecating thing, but now that you mention it, yeah, we put an insane amount of time into this blog.
We start at lunch time, with Emily finding Aria to shake up our usual episode-beginning routine. It's only the two of them as they recap last episode: New Jason and Aria kissed, and it was a mistake; New Jason had creepy pictures of Aria as his barn decor. Spencer shows up just in time to lay on a big I TOLD YOU SO on Aria. Emily lets slip that Jason and Aria kissed and Spencer's shocked. Aria is not happy, and only responds to the, "this guy has stalker pictures of you," with a "fine, fine. I gotta go."
What else did we expect?
What else did we expect?
Buffy gets home with a bucket of fried chicken, only to find that Willow, Tara, Giles and Dawn are already having dinner. It's says a lot about how not-okay things are that this makes everyone super uncomfortable. Giles even says they haven't eaten, even though we can totally see the food. Buffy assures everyone that it's okay, but they all make a big show of really wanting Buffy's chicken.
Kirsti: Oh, Giles. Don't ever change. Also, this scene made me realise that we're only just at the beginning of Buffy's attempts at bringing things home for dinner, and now I has the sads.
Sweeney: THANKS, KIRSTI. NOW I DO TOO.
Kirsti: Oh, Giles. Don't ever change. Also, this scene made me realise that we're only just at the beginning of Buffy's attempts at bringing things home for dinner, and now I has the sads.
Sweeney: THANKS, KIRSTI. NOW I DO TOO.
We open at Lorne's bar with Angel apologising sincerely to someone off camera - he used them and he feels really bad about it. Said off camera person turns out to be Merl the snitch, who doesn't believe Angel's apology on account of he's reading it from a piece of paper.Merl doesn't feel like it's sincere enough, and Angel eye-rolls at the Fang Gang who are still sporting completely terrible hair. Cordy pulls Merl aside for a pep talk while Wes does the same for Angel. Angel eventually offers Merl a free shot at him, and then taunts him until he throws a bottle. At which point Merl gets hurled back by some kind of force field. Angel tries to keep a straight face while Lorne makes the sarcastic excuse that Angel must have "forgotten" that demon violence is impossible in his bar.
EL James only ever starts chapters one second after the previous or with Ana waking up.
Ana wakes up, and it's her birthday. I'm pretty sure enough has been said about how loathsome it is that her birthday is near or around mine (and so many of you in the comments!) but I'm saying it again, because the Number Gods have deemed that I am to cover her actual birthday on top of it all.
Ana takes full moments to "orientate" herself, and it comes with a sense of deja vu over being at the Heathman again. She "gasps out loud," and look if these jokes are recycled, file a complaint with EL James who after three books, didn't learn that a gasp is an audible thing.
Ana wakes up, and it's her birthday. I'm pretty sure enough has been said about how loathsome it is that her birthday is near or around mine (and so many of you in the comments!) but I'm saying it again, because the Number Gods have deemed that I am to cover her actual birthday on top of it all.
Ana takes full moments to "orientate" herself, and it comes with a sense of deja vu over being at the Heathman again. She "gasps out loud," and look if these jokes are recycled, file a complaint with EL James who after three books, didn't learn that a gasp is an audible thing.
A seizure cut introduces the episode as Cordelia, Wesley and Gunn leave the Brooding Hotel with their possessions in white boxes. Cordelia echoes our feelings at the end of last episode with a, "what just happened?"
Sweeney: The end of the last episode was a reminder of how fun being a new watcher of a show can be. I'm surprisingly spoiled on this show, BUT I STILL CAN'T STOP ASKING THIS QUESTION, CORDELIA. Good job show. But also, PLEASE EXPLAIN YOURSELF.
K: Agreed. Also, A+ gif selection, Lor.
Sweeney: The end of the last episode was a reminder of how fun being a new watcher of a show can be. I'm surprisingly spoiled on this show, BUT I STILL CAN'T STOP ASKING THIS QUESTION, CORDELIA. Good job show. But also, PLEASE EXPLAIN YOURSELF.
K: Agreed. Also, A+ gif selection, Lor.
There were split opinions on the whole randomly throwing out the fact Buffy has a sister thing. It was strange to me, but I also know that I'm not the exact audience it was written for. I only mean that I had 10 years of pop culture to tell me Dawn would show up eventually and a bit of foreshadowing last season told me she was probably Buffy's sister. That's a ton of build-up all leading to about 10 seconds last episode where it was all, "AND BUFFY HAS A SISTER LOLOL."
Sweeney: When I first watched last summer I sent our group of bloggy friends a series of DAFUQ? emails.
Sweeney: When I first watched last summer I sent our group of bloggy friends a series of DAFUQ? emails.
Lorraine: I was expecting the credits to roll first, but we get a pre-credits teaser today! Against a black screen we hear some war sounds -metal clanging, screaming and general death-sounds. We stylistically fade into the white misery of north of the wall where Samwell is running through the snow with all the speed and grace of someone who is about to get eaten very soon.
Sweeney: I was totally surprised to find him still alive! I assumed he was dead after that finale. I can't say that I care all that much that either way, but it was unexpected.
Sweeney: I was totally surprised to find him still alive! I assumed he was dead after that finale. I can't say that I care all that much that either way, but it was unexpected.
Sweeney: Ana sits in front of Grey's fireplace emotionless and lost in internal monologue, even though there are at least a dozen people there with her, because Ana can't be bothered to interact with people who aren't Christian, and he has gone missing.
Lorraine: In an early reminder that Ana sucks, is not a real human being, and doesn't know how to interact with human beings, she tells us that she "blinks dispassionately" at Grace and Mia. DISPASSIONATELY. They've just lost a son/brother respectively, but this bitch who has known him for less than two months is so wrapped up in her own damn emotions describes herself as completely unaffected by their emotions.
What a stand-up character you've created, James. Truly.
Lorraine: In an early reminder that Ana sucks, is not a real human being, and doesn't know how to interact with human beings, she tells us that she "blinks dispassionately" at Grace and Mia. DISPASSIONATELY. They've just lost a son/brother respectively, but this bitch who has known him for less than two months is so wrapped up in her own damn emotions describes herself as completely unaffected by their emotions.
What a stand-up character you've created, James. Truly.
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