We start with bright blue sky, cheery music, a banner proclaiming the 2012 London Olympics and even some houses with little Union flags in the windows. It reminds me of when Kirsti was last in the US and astounded by the number of flags we fly. #Merica
K: TRUE. Y'all need to back off on the flags. It's RIDICULOUS. I have yet to see any private residence in Australia flying the Australian flag. Wait. Maybe the posh place with a freaking turret near my cousin's old high school that usually flies a pirate flag puts up the Australian flag for Australia Day? IDK IDK.
As with many episodes, we start off in the Cohen’s kitchen, because why else would we need to see other parts of their humongous house. Although, it’s a shnazzy looking kitchen.
Marines: If past episodes are to be believed they only have one guest bedroom. I think this house is just a kitchen, a pool house and like 2.5 other rooms. IT'S ALL A RUSE.
Lily: Seth and Ryan discuss potential Spring Break plans.
Marines: If past episodes are to be believed they only have one guest bedroom. I think this house is just a kitchen, a pool house and like 2.5 other rooms. IT'S ALL A RUSE.
Lily: Seth and Ryan discuss potential Spring Break plans.
A young woman runs along an abandoned dock at night in tiny shorts and a sports bra. I roll my eyes so hard they nearly fall out of their sockets because no woman on earth would go running alone at night dressed like that. (A: +1.) She stops to get a drink at a water fountain, then looks up when there's a crack of thunder. She sees a ghostly sailing ship float past, then vanish. She runs off, looking freaked out.
Cut to her house, where she's showering. Segue: does anybody actually do a shampoo advert style hair flip in the shower? Because I call bullshit. It just makes the ceiling wet and drippy.
Cut to her house, where she's showering. Segue: does anybody actually do a shampoo advert style hair flip in the shower? Because I call bullshit. It just makes the ceiling wet and drippy.
Shrine O’Spielberg. Dawson is watching his Really Dumb Witch Island Movie. Joey climbs in the window just to make us all aggravated when the episode has barely begun. Dawson is nervous about an upcoming screening of his Laughably Terrible Witch Island Movie, but Joey reassures him that it's great and will help him make his dreams come true or some bullshit like that. (K: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. Sure it will, Joey. Sure it will.)
Joey also helpfully exposits that she has acontrivance college tour this weekend where she’s staying with a random student.
Joey also helpfully exposits that she has a
Maple Springs, New York. The tinkly orchestra tinkles as we pan across a billboard for a housing estate that starts "Once upon a time". You know, just in case you couldn't tell this was going to be fairy tale themed. We pan down further to the construction site where three somewhat chubby brothers are talking. There's a growly sound and one looks around. His brother pooh-poohs the noise, and the trio go back to arguing about whether they should be using cinder blocks or bricks rather than timber in the construction, because "One gust of wind and the whole place is gonna blow over!". Do you get who they are yet, or should the writers hit us with the obvious anvil a few more times?
We open at a prison. A dude I know from One Episode of Everything Ever heads into the visiting area where he's visiting Gordon. UGH, GORDON. (A: I second this ugh.) He fills Gordon in on what happened in Wyoming, and Gordon's all "SAM WINCHESTER WAS THERE". Our random visitor, Kubrick, confirms it, but says he's heard the Winchesters were there to help. Gordon refuses to believe it, and says "Sam Winchester must die". He hangs up the phone (without saying goodbye) and we fade to black.