Previously: Mated for sure now. — Episode 6 Marines: We start the episode by seeing that Diana has been kidnapped by Satu, who is flying them, much to Diana’s shock and...
We start at Quake. The name of the restaurant is stylized on a piece of reinforced concrete that is cracked down the middle. GET IT?
Phoebe finds Piper at the bar. As per usual (or based on 2 episodes...) Piper is freaking out. Seems the chef that hired her promptly quit and left her to run things alone. This is clearly not the restaurant Piper auditioned at in the pilot, so perhaps she had to do a full rebrand too. Phew! She must be exhausted. Not too exhausted to notice that Phoebe is wearing her dress., though. I have sisters too. I can spot my dress on one of them from an admirable distance away.
Phoebe finds Piper at the bar. As per usual (or based on 2 episodes...) Piper is freaking out. Seems the chef that hired her promptly quit and left her to run things alone. This is clearly not the restaurant Piper auditioned at in the pilot, so perhaps she had to do a full rebrand too. Phew! She must be exhausted. Not too exhausted to notice that Phoebe is wearing her dress., though. I have sisters too. I can spot my dress on one of them from an admirable distance away.
I've tried to mini-recap several shows and nothing ever panned out. If you are reading this post, SUCCESS. If your name is Sweeney, and you are reading this post in our Trash, at least I tried. Tell no one about my failures.
San Francisco under a full moon and lots of rain. A lady feeds her cat, then chants a spell for protection. All the while we see someone sneaking up behind her. She startles, but then relaxes when she sees who it is. Probably she should've stayed on her guard or maybe worked a little harder on that protection spell because the cloaked figure stabs Witchy Cat Lady.
San Francisco under a full moon and lots of rain. A lady feeds her cat, then chants a spell for protection. All the while we see someone sneaking up behind her. She startles, but then relaxes when she sees who it is. Probably she should've stayed on her guard or maybe worked a little harder on that protection spell because the cloaked figure stabs Witchy Cat Lady.
We start exactly where we left off, because this aired as a two hour finale. Buffy and Anya both pull themselves upright, equal parts thrilled and confused to see Giles. Willow on the other hand says, "Uh oh. Daddy's home." He tells her calmly but coldly that she needs to stop what she's doing, but she replies that she's not done yet. She starts to stand, but Giles says "Stay down" and gestures with his fingers. She falls back to the floor, and informs us that no, Giles didn't go back to England become a crazy powerful warlock. He's using borrowed power.
Giles says that he's there to help, but she has no fucks to give. She uses magic to hover herself into the air. Giles makes his "stay down" gesture again, but Willow makes a gesture of her own, and remains unaffected. Giles looks worried.
Giles says that he's there to help, but she has no fucks to give. She uses magic to hover herself into the air. Giles makes his "stay down" gesture again, but Willow makes a gesture of her own, and remains unaffected. Giles looks worried.
We get an entire season worth of previouslies which, much like the Scoobies, almost entirely ignores Dawn. Poor Dawnie. Once that's over with, Buffy's running through the woods followed by Anya and Xander. Xander stops running to possibly throw up, because OH GOD WILLOW JUST FLAYED A GUY. Buffy says that they can't afford to stop because of Willow's "one down..." line. Anya completes the phrase and earns herself a gold star.
Sweeney: Congrats Anya! I don't think she's received many of these!
Lorraine: Xander mentions the smell and sound of the flaying, which is something I hadn't previously given thought to. THANKS XANDER.
Sweeney: Congrats Anya! I don't think she's received many of these!
Lorraine: Xander mentions the smell and sound of the flaying, which is something I hadn't previously given thought to. THANKS XANDER.
We open at the Doublemeat Palace. Buffy is scraping a disgusting amount of brown sludge off the grill while another employee tells her that the key to working at the DMP is politics. He talks about Machiavelli, and when she thinks that's a guy who works day shift, he's all "OH RIGHT. COLLEGE DROPOUT." Buffy says that she's reapplying, and he's a condescending asshat. He leaves to head to night school - after mentioning that he's studying for an MBA so he doesn't have to work at the DMP forever - and tells her to scrape the gum under the tables before she leaves.
Cut to the cemetery. Buffy wanders through the gravestones singing the DMP jingle and wondering why she can't get it out of her head.
Cut to the cemetery. Buffy wanders through the gravestones singing the DMP jingle and wondering why she can't get it out of her head.
After a whopping one minute and twenty three seconds of previouslies (seriously?!), a middle aged couple are being cornered by some guys in an alley. Buffy puns her way into the picture and goes in for the fight, only to discover that the guys doing the cornering are human and she's just interrupted a run of the mill mugging. She hands the lady back her handbag and ushers the couple away.
The muggers, meanwhile, are complete idiots and decide to attack Buffy. She pins one and is heading for the other when a shape jumps out of the darkness and hits the second mugger. Buffy yells "NO!" but it's too late - Spike grabs his head in pain and the muggers get away.
The muggers, meanwhile, are complete idiots and decide to attack Buffy. She pins one and is heading for the other when a shape jumps out of the darkness and hits the second mugger. Buffy yells "NO!" but it's too late - Spike grabs his head in pain and the muggers get away.
Lorraine: Last recap got fun, didn't it? After all that, I just wanted to say that we love hearing all of your feedback. The 3,000 plus words we spend recapping an episode are nothing, if not for the comments section underneath. So, thank you for keeping it interesting. Thank you for being imaginative, insightful, but most, most of all, respectful. Thank you for understanding that you may not change my mind, and I might not change yours but that's okay because there are no right answers.
Well, perhaps there is ONE right answer: potatoes > Riley Finn.
Well, perhaps there is ONE right answer: potatoes > Riley Finn.
We open in the Bigger on the Inside Dorm Room where Buffy and Riley are making out on her bed and the background music suggests that the show has been relocated to Capeside. I fully expect Joey Potter to climb in the window any minute (#TeamPacey). (L: #duh) Riley asks if she's expecting anyone (yes, Joey Potter. We just established that, dude), and she says that Willow's going to be at the library all night. He starts to pull her shirt up and Willow, cockblocker extraordinaire, bursts through the door to rescue us all from the need for brain bleach (which is an excellent thing, because I know what's coming in episode 18, and we'll need to hoard that shit like it's gold).
Two things before we start: (1) The last few episodes have been stressing me out big time. (2) I'M SO EXCITED.
I know these seem like contradicting emotions and they pretty much are, because it's hard being me. But mostly, I'm stressed out for the finale and wars and people dying and shit, but excited because these posts have become a countdown for me and I can't wait to start watching/posting real time. I bet you guys are going to be the best TV watching buddies ever.
Sweeney: We blog because we want TV watching buddies.
Lor: Obviously.
Nothing new to report in the opening credits as we will be in or around King's Landing, Harrenhal, Pyke, Winterfell, The Wall, and Qarth.
Sweeney: We blog because we want TV watching buddies.
Lor: Obviously.
Nothing new to report in the opening credits as we will be in or around King's Landing, Harrenhal, Pyke, Winterfell, The Wall, and Qarth.