Previously: A no-good, very bad double date. — Concert Interruptus Samantha: This episode begins with Rory laying on Lorelai’s bed while she rummages through the closet. Lor insists that there is...
Previously: Eleven saved Mike from falling off a cliff. — The Bathtub Marines: Mike cleans Eleven’s face and tells her that’s much better. She looks at her reflection in the mirror...
Summer is in bed staring at her ugly engagement ring. Taylor walks in, asking for help with her resolutions. So far she's got "get a job and stop mooching off of other people's families" and "take calcium supplements." That's basically it.
Samantha: Taylor, if you're gonna take calcium you might as well take iron, too. Get a well rounded supplement system going.
Mari: After a beat, Summer suggests she add one more thing: plan Summer's wedding.
Samantha: Taylor, if you're gonna take calcium you might as well take iron, too. Get a well rounded supplement system going.
Mari: After a beat, Summer suggests she add one more thing: plan Summer's wedding.
Hello! I am so very excited and honored to be writing for Snark Squad! Seriously thank you, Mari for letting me do this. And now I am so sorry for the endless parade of stupid you're all about to read. Blame it on my youth y'all! Also blame it on the fact that I have never seen the OC ever in my life. When the OC was in its prime, I was still singing along happily to Hannah Montana. (M: That makes me feel a wee bit old, in that strange, almost 30 kind of way...)(R: You're not old! I'm young!) On with the recap!
Orange County is pretty! That's how we open before settling in on the Cohen home, where Kirsten exposits that Ryan hasn’t spoken to them in days. Sandy says he’s not worried about Ryan not talking to the two of them, but he is concerned that Ryan’s still ignoring Seth.
Meanwhile, Ryan’s on the phone with Julie, who’s pouting about Sandy and Kirsten uninviting her from Thanksgiving. Kirsten and Sandy are discussing this as well, and Sandy says sending their kids on a murder mission knocks you off the guest list.
Meanwhile, Ryan’s on the phone with Julie, who’s pouting about Sandy and Kirsten uninviting her from Thanksgiving. Kirsten and Sandy are discussing this as well, and Sandy says sending their kids on a murder mission knocks you off the guest list.
Ryan broodily channel surfs. Kirsten sadly folds laundry. It's a difficult day at the Cohen house.
Kirsten hears a door. Seth goes directly to the pool house and Sandy meets Kirsten in the main house. We cut between Seth and Sandy telling the story that Seth denied all fire-setting charges. Sandy isn't sure he believes that, especially since he saw the confession napkin. Seth tells Ryan that it was totally a mistake. Ryan tells him to tell The Eyebrows the truth, but lol, no. Meanwhile, the Cohen parents worry about what would happen if they accuse Seth of lying and he isn't.
Kirsten hears a door. Seth goes directly to the pool house and Sandy meets Kirsten in the main house. We cut between Seth and Sandy telling the story that Seth denied all fire-setting charges. Sandy isn't sure he believes that, especially since he saw the confession napkin. Seth tells Ryan that it was totally a mistake. Ryan tells him to tell The Eyebrows the truth, but lol, no. Meanwhile, the Cohen parents worry about what would happen if they accuse Seth of lying and he isn't.
We open on a video game match between the boys. Summer is bored, while Seth is certain that he doesn’t need to prep for his interview with Brown. Seeing as this is TV, and he’s one of the main characters, he’s probably right. New Girl (aka Sadie) comes in and challenges Seth to a video game off, which is CRAZY because she is a girl! But she does it anyway.
Ryan and Summer grab drinks in the other room and discuss how it’s totally not awkward that Ryan isn’t dating Marissa anymore.
Ryan and Summer grab drinks in the other room and discuss how it’s totally not awkward that Ryan isn’t dating Marissa anymore.
I should confess right now that I haven’t been keeping up with the OC recaps at all, so I have absolutely no idea what’s happening on the show at the moment. I thought I had watched all of Season 3 when it first aired, but there were people in the previouslies that I didn’t recognise at all, so I’m going to have to just wing it.
From the title I know that this is a Chrismukkah episode, but we open with a bunch of shots of a very sunny OC which just seems wrong to me, typing this just after Christmas while wrapped in a blanket watching the snow fall outside.
From the title I know that this is a Chrismukkah episode, but we open with a bunch of shots of a very sunny OC which just seems wrong to me, typing this just after Christmas while wrapped in a blanket watching the snow fall outside.
Do you see us being all timely with these topics? Check out last week's Segue Magic, in which we discussed or favorite (and a few least favorite) fictional fathers:
The previouslies take us all the way back to Season 1, with King Robert asking Ned why he had to bury his sister/Robert's betrothed Lyanna in Winterfell and placing a feather in Lyanna's statue's hands. We see Littlefinger telling Sansa about her worst marriage prospect yet (M: We remember this part, show.) (S: But would it really be Game of Thrones without a little twisting of the knife?), the Margaery vs. Cersei battle for Tommen's affections, Loras being gay and beautiful (M: We remember this part for sure.), Cersei teaming up with the High Sparrow, Ellaria Sand trying to convince the Dornish Prince Doran to avenge his brother Oberyn, the Sons of the Harpy murdering everyone in Meereen, and oh yeah, Ser Jorah kidnapped Tyrion and is taking him to "the queen." Ah, but which queen?
Happy (belated) Mother's Day, Traumateers.
We celebrated by being super proud of ourselves for actually being timely with one of these topics:
We celebrated by being super proud of ourselves for actually being timely with one of these topics:
I really wanted to pretend that I have totally been keeping up with the show since recapping The Telanovela, but there is literally nothing happening before my mind is already blown. It wasn't THAT long ago that Kirsten was bragging about her specialty of taking food out of take out containers and now she's apparently cooked a full gourmet breakfast!? Was the drinking really that bad?
Wait, Seth and Ryan are looking very confused by this exuberant breakfast before school (they're all still so awake in the morning, it's weird) so it must not be a regular thing. In typical teenage-boy fashion, they just want their cereal and bagels.
Wait, Seth and Ryan are looking very confused by this exuberant breakfast before school (they're all still so awake in the morning, it's weird) so it must not be a regular thing. In typical teenage-boy fashion, they just want their cereal and bagels.
The Core Four are sitting in the diner, with Summer lamenting Ryan and Marissa’s expulsions from Harbor. Ryan and Marissa try to tell her it won’t be that bad, but Summer says it will be for Seth, seeing how before Ryan, he was bullied by people who called him “Death Breath Seth,” and Marissa’s like, uh, YOU called him that. Summer ignores that and says this was supposed to be the best year ever. All Ryan and Marissa want is to go back to school, but Summer tells them it’ll be okay as long as they stick together.
We start in the Cohen kitchen, where it looks like rabid raccoons have just finished having a banquet. Haha, nope. The kitchen is filthy because the lady of the house has been away, and we all know only women know how to keep a kitchen clean. (M: It's coded in that extra X chromosome. #science)
Sandy Eyebrows Cohen is expressing how important it is for them all to still eat together as a family because it’s a special day for Seth and Ryan; the first day of their senior year.
Sandy Eyebrows Cohen is expressing how important it is for them all to still eat together as a family because it’s a special day for Seth and Ryan; the first day of their senior year.
rom the previouslies, I can see that shit is going DOWN here at the O.C. Everyone is varying degrees of upset and angry and there was even a dramatic pool dive. And now it’s finale time.
Sandy talks to someone on the phone while looking over brochures for a swanky rehab place. He says he’ll meet them soon, right after this funeral he has to attend, which I take is that of Caleb. Ah Caleb, we knew ye too well to mourn ye.
Seth walks somberly downstairs and greets Kirsten. They make awkward small talk about Caleb that isn’t entirely true. Seth is looking for a cell phone charger and goes into Sandy’s office and rifles through drawers to find one.
Sandy talks to someone on the phone while looking over brochures for a swanky rehab place. He says he’ll meet them soon, right after this funeral he has to attend, which I take is that of Caleb. Ah Caleb, we knew ye too well to mourn ye.
Seth walks somberly downstairs and greets Kirsten. They make awkward small talk about Caleb that isn’t entirely true. Seth is looking for a cell phone charger and goes into Sandy’s office and rifles through drawers to find one.