This book is absolutely taking over bookish communities right now. I read it, in good faith, because I heard good reviews even before it was published. I hated it. It is in fact so bad that it can be snarked, chapter by chapter. Hello, welcome.
Previously: Geralt just wanted a genie nap and everyone was trying to steal his genie. — Rare Species Marines: Jaskier is working on a song while two men stand by, very...
Previously: We found the real worst school for magic. Content warnings: Violence, nudity, gore, ableism, incest, infertility, and a hysterectomy. — Betrayer Moon Marines: A very dirty boy is on a bed....
I know you guys have all been waiting to find out what question Edward is going to ask Bella, right? It must be BIG because Stephenie Meyer decided to end her previous chapter and start a whole new one!
Here we go!
"Can I ask just one more?" I pleaded as Edward accelerated much too quickly down the quiet street."
Aw, man! Stephenie! You cheated!
Edward allows Bella one more question but his lips are "pressed together in a cautious line." Is this like his "careful eyes"? Are all of my features reckless? Are they bad to the bone?
Here we go!
"Can I ask just one more?" I pleaded as Edward accelerated much too quickly down the quiet street."
Aw, man! Stephenie! You cheated!
Edward allows Bella one more question but his lips are "pressed together in a cautious line." Is this like his "careful eyes"? Are all of my features reckless? Are they bad to the bone?
Previously: Surprise heir and another house on the Thames. — Marines: Max is in a cab, on his way back to the office. He gets a call from someone named...
On the girly roadtrip to Port Angeles, Jessica wibbles about boys and dates while forcing them to listen to "whiny rock songs". Despite this, Bella informs us that "the estrogen rush was invigorating". I…don't know what the fuck that means. I think she's trying to say that it was nice to hang out with other teenage girls, but she's also told us multiple times that she gives zero fucks about Jessica and Angela, so…yeah.
Marines: I died laughing. I've been a girl all of my life and I've never experienced an invigorating estrogen rush. Should I be asking for my money back?
Marines: I died laughing. I've been a girl all of my life and I've never experienced an invigorating estrogen rush. Should I be asking for my money back?
To start, we did indeed hear the news of the gender-flipped Twilight reimagining. I've already started skimming through it, mostly to decide what to do with it. I think recaps are firmly off the table, only because it's like 90% copy/paste/find/replace pronouns. It doesn't make sense to recap the same stuff all over again (a lesson we're kind of learning over on the Grey recaps, which at least has the "benefit" of a POV switch...). I do think it's worth pointing out some things about the reimagining, namely all the stupid little changes Meyer made because of gender norms and sexism, I guess.
Previously: Damon’s got some plans but dot dot dot. Content Warnings: Rape, murder, mind control. — Friday Night Bites Emmy: We start the episode off with Caroline tiptoeing around the room to...
Previously: Edward saves Bella from a van and regrets it a lot. — Marines: Edward starts by telling us that high school is no longer purgatory, but actual hell– torment, fire...
Previously: Max-a-something Treve-whatever has a flat overlooking the Thames (yay!) and inherited responsibility (boo!). — Marines: It appears we will be switching perspectives to some extent as we are now...
Previously: Supergirl was kind of bad at her job, but then Maggie was also kind of bad at her job. — City of Lost Children Catherine: This week, we open...
The chapter opens with the line "The next day was better... and worse," and I'm already pissed off.
The day was better for Bella because it wasn't raining yet and she knew what to expect on her second day of school, but worse, because she was tired. Bella complains about the rain, the people she has to attend school with, but she internal-monologues about how she is starting to remember some of her fellow students' names. This is the short list of complaints explaining how her day was better. Girl. Just. Lighten up.
Catherine: Honestly, she should just be glad that any of her 'fellow students' are willing to be friends with her. It's a sacrifice.
The day was better for Bella because it wasn't raining yet and she knew what to expect on her second day of school, but worse, because she was tired. Bella complains about the rain, the people she has to attend school with, but she internal-monologues about how she is starting to remember some of her fellow students' names. This is the short list of complaints explaining how her day was better. Girl. Just. Lighten up.
Catherine: Honestly, she should just be glad that any of her 'fellow students' are willing to be friends with her. It's a sacrifice.
We sure do like starting things and vampires around here. — Pilot Emmy: The Vampire Diaries was a series of novels written in 1991, and I read them sometime during the...
It starts with a Bible verse.
Sorry, sorry, I just feel like this book is already taking itself too seriously, but okay.
Kirsti: Technically, it starts with a dedication to her sister Emily, "without whose enthusiasm this story might still be unfinished." DAMMIT, EMILY. THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.
Mari: Perhaps when we get particularly frustrated with the story, we can just yell, "EMILY."
Onward to the preface. An unidentified someone says she has never given much thought to how she would die, but had she thought about it, she wouldn't have imagined this. Let's just call this unidentified person Bella, okay?
Sorry, sorry, I just feel like this book is already taking itself too seriously, but okay.
Kirsti: Technically, it starts with a dedication to her sister Emily, "without whose enthusiasm this story might still be unfinished." DAMMIT, EMILY. THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.
Mari: Perhaps when we get particularly frustrated with the story, we can just yell, "EMILY."
Onward to the preface. An unidentified someone says she has never given much thought to how she would die, but had she thought about it, she wouldn't have imagined this. Let's just call this unidentified person Bella, okay?
EL James published a new book so here we are again. Bets in the comments on if this one will be better or worse. — Marines: A few months ago, Nicole and...