Kirsti: We open on a sunny morning with a girl in a historically inaccurate costume pouring water from a well into a jug. It's 1753, and we're in Galway. Oh, sorry. Galway, IRELAND, because the show needs to clarify such things for stupid people who don't know where Galway is.
Sweeney: This is an American show. Our people don't know shit about maps or other places. They can't even put half the US states on a map, so expecting them to identify foreign cities without clarification is just too much.
K: And yet someone decided America should be in charge of the world. Go figure...
Sweeney: The episode begins with Willow chanting, but we pan out and realize that she's just "praying" for a good card in a poker game with Xander and Anya, who is predictably bad at poker. Xander is bummed about their current lack of money, but he swears that's about to change because he's going to sell some crap that doesn't sound at all appealing.
K: I love Anya's "dirty dirty cheater witch" expression of exasperation. Also her complaining about playing poker with chips. In high school, we used to play poker with M&Ms. Which turned out to be horribly flawed because we'd eat them all in about five minutes and not be able to bet any more...
K: I love Anya's "dirty dirty cheater witch" expression of exasperation. Also her complaining about playing poker with chips. In high school, we used to play poker with M&Ms. Which turned out to be horribly flawed because we'd eat them all in about five minutes and not be able to bet any more...
Kirsti: SURPRISE!!!! Lor didn't get the chance to watch today's episode of Angel before she flew out to California to hang out with Sweeney and DAMMIT WHY AM I ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE WORLD RIGHT NOW. Anyway, Lor and I have done a swap, so you're stuck with me today. Which is absolutely fine by me, because today's episode has a spectacular guest star.
Sweeney: HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Lorraine: Seriously, thank you for doing this so Sweeney and I could hang out on the right side of the world. AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Sweeney: HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Lorraine: Seriously, thank you for doing this so Sweeney and I could hang out on the right side of the world. AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Kirsti: Oh, Whedon. You really do like to deliver us ALL THE FEELS at once, don't you? Sigh.
Lorraine: Thanks for the upfront warning. We should consider giving our own version of TV Parental Guidelines. This episode is rated F for feels. Viewer Discretion is advised.
Sweeney: YES.
K: Other ratings? B for Boring, R for Rage Inducing, and and S for SPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!!!
Lorraine: Thanks for the upfront warning. We should consider giving our own version of TV Parental Guidelines. This episode is rated F for feels. Viewer Discretion is advised.
Sweeney: YES.
K: Other ratings? B for Boring, R for Rage Inducing, and and S for SPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!!!
The moody music starts right away as Angel winds a clock and tests the levelness of his desk. Cordelia and Doyle enter. She gives us the exposition: Angel was in Sunnydale for three days and saw Buffy! Why isn't he brooding more? Cordy's guess is that his lack of brooding actually means that he's brooding more than usual. Cordy sees him take out a stake from his desk, assumes the worst, and rushes into the office telling him it's not worth it! He will meet someone else! Angel explains he just needs the stake to level his desk, which just seems like the most inefficient way to level anything. He is going to trip over that stake. For sure.
Sweeney: It's round! That doesn't even make sense!
Sweeney: It's round! That doesn't even make sense!
K: We open in an alley. A bag drops into frame, followed by a man. He starts to walk away, but there's a short blonde woman standing the shadows. He runs, and she chases him down, eventually delivering a spectacular fly kick when he tries to get in a car. The camera pans out, and the woman is Kate. She roughs him up a little and then arrests him. Cut to the police station. Kate's trying to get Crook Man to spill the beans on where a certain Mob boss type is, but he's not spilling. Eventually she snaps and pins him against the wall with an arm across his throat.
S: A commenter pointed out that Kate is sort of a Buffy-like placeholder.
S: A commenter pointed out that Kate is sort of a Buffy-like placeholder.
Lorraine: I was expecting the credits to roll first, but we get a pre-credits teaser today! Against a black screen we hear some war sounds -metal clanging, screaming and general death-sounds. We stylistically fade into the white misery of north of the wall where Samwell is running through the snow with all the speed and grace of someone who is about to get eaten very soon.
Sweeney: I was totally surprised to find him still alive! I assumed he was dead after that finale. I can't say that I care all that much that either way, but it was unexpected.
Sweeney: I was totally surprised to find him still alive! I assumed he was dead after that finale. I can't say that I care all that much that either way, but it was unexpected.
Lorraine: Cordelia is giving Doyle a little taste of her audition for a commercial. She does as well as you would imagine. The phone rings and he wonders if she's going to pick that up, and Angel wanders in to wonder the same thing. Angel as a boss makes me giggle.
Sweeney: It doesn't suit him particularly well....
K: Truth. Also, the idea of Cordy starring in an advert for garbage bags is rather hilarious.
Lor: Cordelia scurries over, but by that point, the answering machine has it. It's someone named Aura who's calling to check in on Cordy.
Sweeney: It doesn't suit him particularly well....
K: Truth. Also, the idea of Cordy starring in an advert for garbage bags is rather hilarious.
Lor: Cordelia scurries over, but by that point, the answering machine has it. It's someone named Aura who's calling to check in on Cordy.
Previously: Frank was voted into the Midnight Society for his story of following men around the wood and answering riddles. — The Tale of Laughing In the Dark Lorraine: Okay,...