Spencer and Emily are returning to Spencer's house from school when MariskaMom arrives to deliver very bad news. The police have issued a warrant and will now be going through the entire Hastings house, including Spencer's room. She runs up there to stop them, but they're boxing up all of her shit - diaries, laptop, notebooks. Can someone with a criminal justice degree please tell me if this would EVER happen based on the evidence they have on Spencer? Which is, none.
Spencer wants her mom to make them stop, but MariskaMom says they're just doing their jobs. Ian shows up just in time to do a long, creepy stare into the room, while drinking a glass of milk. Wtf.
Buffy appraises a bunch of coffins. Spooky music plays while she opens one up, but it's all a bit of misdirection. There is nothing in the coffin. Buffy is here to pick one for Joyce.
Misdirection dictated that Buffy was doing all of this in the dark, in a room away from Giles, Dawn and the salesman. They enter the room now, and Buffy points out her selection. The salesman makes a skeevy comment about he can tell how much she care for the deceased based on her selection. It must be expensive. (S: Clearly. Such a skeevy and inappropriate comment and this guy needs a new line of work.) (K: Agreed. Creepy coffin salesman is creepy.)
Misdirection dictated that Buffy was doing all of this in the dark, in a room away from Giles, Dawn and the salesman. They enter the room now, and Buffy points out her selection. The salesman makes a skeevy comment about he can tell how much she care for the deceased based on her selection. It must be expensive. (S: Clearly. Such a skeevy and inappropriate comment and this guy needs a new line of work.) (K: Agreed. Creepy coffin salesman is creepy.)
Kirsti: After the previouslies, we're at the hospital where Dawn's eating the jelly (L: JELL-O.) off Joyce's hospital tray with her fingers (EW). Joyce says she won't be offended if the girls go out for real people food. Buffy poo-poos her, and I can't help but notice that she's wearing a hoodie and tracksuit pants, which is the 2000s version of the Overalls of Overall Sadness. Poor Buff.
Kirsti: We open in the Bigger on the Inside Dorm Room which is what I'm gonna go ahead and insist on calling Willow and Tara's room. (L: Another nickname for the Nickname Graveyard then. I'd pour out wine in its honor, but LOL. I'm not wasting wine.) (Fair) Tara's telling Willow a story while Miss Kitty Fantastico plays on the floor. Willow gets sleepy, and Tara asks if she can keep the light on to look up some spells. Willow makes an Eyebrows of Innuendo comment about how she doesn't need to be snuggled, and then asks why Tara's been studying spells so much. Tara says that she a) needs to keep up with Willow, and b) likes to be useful to the Scoobies. It's pretty much adorable.
Hanna is in lots of trouble with her mom partly for wrecking her boyfriend's car, but mostly for the fact that there are cops at her house again and she can't sex her way out of this one for Hanna. Poor Mama Marin. It seems like this is the first time she found a problem her vagina couldn't solve.
The PLL's are talking about the exciting new memorial bench the town is putting in and the flowers they'll plant and BFF tiles they will all make for Alison. Hanna still has Alison's bracelet and she is not happy about it. The other girls hesitate, but Spencer takes it and tells the girls to grow the fuck up.
The PLL's are talking about the exciting new memorial bench the town is putting in and the flowers they'll plant and BFF tiles they will all make for Alison. Hanna still has Alison's bracelet and she is not happy about it. The other girls hesitate, but Spencer takes it and tells the girls to grow the fuck up.
Kirsti: We open on a sunny morning with a girl in a historically inaccurate costume pouring water from a well into a jug. It's 1753, and we're in Galway. Oh, sorry. Galway, IRELAND, because the show needs to clarify such things for stupid people who don't know where Galway is.
Sweeney: This is an American show. Our people don't know shit about maps or other places. They can't even put half the US states on a map, so expecting them to identify foreign cities without clarification is just too much.
K: And yet someone decided America should be in charge of the world. Go figure...
Sweeney: This is an American show. Our people don't know shit about maps or other places. They can't even put half the US states on a map, so expecting them to identify foreign cities without clarification is just too much.
K: And yet someone decided America should be in charge of the world. Go figure...
I think the credits like me better than Sweeney. I get a new place today! Off we go to King's Landing, Harrenhal, Riverrun, Winterfell on Fire, The Wall, and Yunkai!
Sweeney: OH. COOL. -_-
Lor: We start at the Brotherhood Without Banners and they are praying to the Lord of Light, to give them wisdom and to let The Hound die if he's guilty, "for the night is dark and full of terrors." I feel really bad stereotyping an entire group of fictional characters based solely on their religion, but maybe now that they've all chanted "the night is dark" thing, I can stereotype them based on their motto? No? I'M SORRY. They are just creeping me out now.
Sweeney: OH. COOL. -_-
Lor: We start at the Brotherhood Without Banners and they are praying to the Lord of Light, to give them wisdom and to let The Hound die if he's guilty, "for the night is dark and full of terrors." I feel really bad stereotyping an entire group of fictional characters based solely on their religion, but maybe now that they've all chanted "the night is dark" thing, I can stereotype them based on their motto? No? I'M SORRY. They are just creeping me out now.
Sweeney: Christian Grey's MAGICAL birthday continues. I'm drafting this early because the actual post date is too close to my own birthday and I don't intend to celebrate with Christian Grey's butt plug.
Speaking of, someone mentioned last week that Ana's failures now extend to gift giving, as Grey's presents were mostly his own stuff. Good job, Ana!
Lorraine: I was going to make a joke about giving you your own stuff for your birthday, but butt plugs are too close to this joke and I don't want to make it awkward. Maybe I just did.
Speaking of, someone mentioned last week that Ana's failures now extend to gift giving, as Grey's presents were mostly his own stuff. Good job, Ana!
Lorraine: I was going to make a joke about giving you your own stuff for your birthday, but butt plugs are too close to this joke and I don't want to make it awkward. Maybe I just did.
I'm going to start out by saying that this is one of my all time favourite BtVS episodes. I love it so freaking much. Everything about it is phenomenal, and nothing you say can convince me otherwise.
We open in the cemetery at night. Buffy sits on a picnic blanket as Giles reads from a book: "'And on that day, an era came to its inevitable end'. That's all there is." Just when you're thinking big apocalypse-y prophecy, NOPE. SAT prep.
Lorraine: Same, same but different!
We open in the cemetery at night. Buffy sits on a picnic blanket as Giles reads from a book: "'And on that day, an era came to its inevitable end'. That's all there is." Just when you're thinking big apocalypse-y prophecy, NOPE. SAT prep.
Lorraine: Same, same but different!
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